Here, Where Nothing Is Left
by EninasSmile
Summary: Barry hates Eobard Thawne. Eobard needs Barry Allen.
1. Chapter 1

Barry shudders and desperately tries to adjust his hips so that the thrusts wouldn't be this intense but with no avail. The other man's hand is still around his throat, not really suffocating him but holding him in place.

It isn't a painful touch, which makes the whole situation so much worse.

Thawne grunts and changes his rhythm which catches Barry off-guard. He hisses softly and digs his fingers deeper into the mattress he is lying on.

Having the other man in him doesn't exactly hurt, not with the amount of lube and preparation he used on him, but it is such a horrible intimate feeling. It is similar to the way it felt when he was raped before - aside from the pain - as it is an utterly humiliating and mortifying experience. Maybe even worse now.

Barry tenses up when Thawne stops and, despite not wanting to, he opens his eyes slightly and squints up to him. The man frowns down at him, his expression is not angry but rather concerned and he hates him so much for this.

"Am I hurting you?"

This asinine questions causes another couple of tears to pass his eyelids and slid down the sides of his face in sheer frustration and desperation. He wants to scream yes, so badly. Not that it would make any difference.

"Shhh," shushes Thawne in a low and warm voice and moves the hand that has been on his throat so that it is covering his right cheek:" I have got carried away again, hm?"

Barry hates him, he hates the way he looks at him, the way he talks to him. As if he was actually concerned about him, as if this wasn't rape.

"It needs time," goes Thawne on, in this nearly tender voice and starts to caress his cheek with his thumb:" It always takes time before it becomes enjoyable but that doesn't mean that it has to hurt."

He adjusts his position again, so that he is actually kneeing, partly slipping out of Barry, which is such a damn relief, even if it is just momentarily, and reaches for a pillow. Carefully, he urges him to lift his hips so that he can push it under him. Barry really doesn't want to, he really, really doesn't, because he knows what now follows.

Still, disobeying would only mean pain and he is tired of this, of all of this.

After Thawne is satisfied with his new position, he sits back again and pushes inside him once more, which causes Barry to shudder in horror and disgust.

"Shhh," hushes the other man softly and briefly rubs his right thigh:" I will take care of you."

Barry feels how more tears start to run down his face and he presses his eyes shut as he feels a warm and big hand close around his limp penis.

"You will like this."

Barry just wants this to end.


	2. Breaking Pebbles

Eobard knows that it doesn't really matter if you change the past as long as you are able to do so again. This isn't necessarily as helpful as one would think, though. The notion evokes a grim smile and he briefly wonders how many failures he has had to deal with so far.

It doesn't matter. Not anymore.

The world is quiet around him. It nearly always is these days. It doesn't bother him, he hardly even notices it. Slowing down and joining other people again, on the other hand, is an experience he hardly finds interesting or enjoyable enough to actually put the effort to do so in anymore.

He wouldn't be able to do a lot of things otherwise, anyway. Like watching the little crying blond child in front of him who is huddled up next to his bed on the cool floor.

Time travelling is such a fucking messy thing. He tried it, many times. Every time as disappointing as the one before. It was like an unspoken law that he could change Barry Allen's life just so much before it ended into a total clusterfuck. This was an endless source of frustration for him back then.

These days, he smiles when he remembers how unimaginative he has been.

Eobard steps closer to the small boy who can hardly be older than six. His eyes stay fixed on him.

The Speed Force is a fickle thing, Eobard has studied it for a very long time by now and he knows that, if he was honest with himself – and he is because if he had any faults it certainly isn't lying to himself – he is no closer to understand it than he was when he first laid an eye on the Flash.

The little kid's expression is frozen in an expression of fear, pain and utter confusion. Eobard has been studying him for a while now. His face is pale and his cheek are wet with tears. They shine in the pale light of the moon that falls through the window above the bed.

The Speed Force isn't just like a linear stream, they all know it, all of them who are connected to it. Every time you decide to run against it, go back somewhere you don't have any place to be, you create a new branch, some with catastrophic ramifications and others not so much.

It can be used for so much more than that, though.

Eobard breaths the air of the small bedroom in deeply, the taste of sweat and fear is thick in it and causes his cock to twitch slightly. His can't but keep on studying the small child with the blond hairs and wide blue eyes.

This night is special. He has to attend it, he needs to. He always does. It is the passing of the crossroad on which everything starts to really change. No matter how much he has influenced the little boy's life before that, this always makes the actual difference.

Eobard crouches down in front of the small child, his eyes wander down over his curled up body and he marvels over how fragile and tiny Barry Allen once was. How easy it would be to simply snatch him away from here and keep him.

A familiar hunger rears its head deep inside him and he feels the urge to touch. He ignores it.

There is no rule that says that going back in time to change something will have horrible consequences. At least not as long as you follow a couple of simple rules. Time is a fickle thing but it is not cruel and it holds no grudges.

Eobard needed a while to find out what made it impossible to act on his plan. Afterwards, he tried to bend those unwritten rules but to no avail. It nearly drove him crazy to be able to change Barry's life but only so much before the Speed Force itself came after him like an antibody trying to eradicate a virus.

He smiles at that notion. It is fitting, after all. He doesn't kid himself about who or what he is. Not that it matters, not in a world he creates to his liking, not when he finally gets the Barry Allen he has been working towards to for so long. After all those failures, he knows – he just knows – that it will work this time.

Studying the little broken child in front of him, he can't but feel elated about what promises he holds.

Everything starts with the Flash. At least what matters to him and he has come to understand this by now.

Then, despite intending to ignore it, Eobard notices the blood and, while he doesn't want to, he gazes briefly over to the rumpled bedding. An annoyed frown follows and he turns towards the door, behind which the other man has just vanished.

He never liked the fact that he needs others for his plan. Having others put their ugly hands on what is his, what would be his in just a few years, in a blink of an eye for someone like him, is disgusting and upsetting.

At times, it angers him that Barry forces him to do this. It is unsettling to think that he isn't enough to get him where he needs him to be.

It are moments like this that he enjoys the thought of all the pain and tragedy the boy is going to face. Always just for a second, though, before another feeling overcomes him, one of shame and disgust.

Eobard, despite what anybody would say or think, doesn't want to hurt or break Barry Allen, but he has to. There is no other way, he has certainly tried everything before.

Barry would understand, in the end. Maybe it would take a long time but Eobard knows that while time can't heal all wounds it can help to make peace with anything.

He turns back to the child, who looks still as scared and confused as before, and something moves uneasily in his stomach. Suddenly, watching the young boy doesn't offer anything mesmerizing anymore.

Eobard decides that he has been here for long enough.


	3. Unlikely Company

Barry slowly limps over to the swings.

The old trailer park is completely vacant and a rather creepy sight this late at night with how rundown it has become over the last couple years.

Barry doesn't mind. To him it is a familiar and safe place. He usually comes here when it becomes too much to be around Jacob.

Grinding his teeth, he lets himself drop onto one of the swings with a stifled groan. His back hurts, as does his right hip. The older man really hasn't pulled his punches tonight and he used that damn baton of his again.

Jacob is not a mellow drunk, he has never been and his bad temper has only gotten worse with time. Barry knew the moment he entered their home this evening that it would end like this again. Sometimes, he really hates his host father.

Tired, and not really in the mood to wallow over what he couldn't change anyway, he turns his attention up to the darkening sky where he can make out the faint shine of few stars through the thickening layer of clouds. The moon is up there as well, pale and big, and he studies it while he listens to the wind and other slight noises around him. His mind starts to drift off as it usually does when he comes here and a welcome calm settles over him.

Due to the throbbing pain in his back, he know that it would be wise not to move too much and when then with caution. Experience has taught him that it is always better to be careful. Tonight he doesn't feel like being careful or doing the sensible thing, though, and he can't resist the urge to lightly push himself away from the ground with his feet so that he starts to swing.

It is a nice feeling, freeing in a way, and he wonders how many times hie has fount his way here over the years after he ended up like this, beaten and hurt and fed up with taking what that old mean man dishes out so easily. He is no longer scared, not really, he stopped to be afraid of Jacob a couple of years ago. Now, the abuse is mostly just exhausting and, at times, makes him feel much older than he really is.

"J-just another year," he murmurs and it is hard to believe that this could really be the case.

Despite everything, he is very good at school, the best in his class, not that it matters to Jacob or really anybody else, but it would be his ticket out of here. He knows that he could get a scholarship after graduation should he be able to keep his grades up, he has informed himself about this as soon as he learned that something like that exists. He isn't sure yet about what he wants to do then, which subject he should choose and such, but it doesn't really matter as long as he would be able to get away from here. He is so tired of it all.

"You found yourself a cosy spot, beanpole."

The voice cuts through his thoughts like a knife and startles Barry bad enough that he actually jumps off the swing, nearly tripping while doing so.

This causes his unexpected but not unfamiliar companion to laugh, clearly amused by his reaction, which in turn causes his face to warm up uncomfortably.

"D-don't s-sneak up o-on me l-like th-that, L-Lisa!"

"Don't be such a chicken all the time, Allen," chuckles the blond girl and gives him a smile that is all teeth. Barry frowns but stays quiet. He has noticed the shiner she is carrying around and decides that they both probably had enough fighting for tonight.

Lisa returns his look unabashed before she lifts an eyebrow and smirks.

"Like what you see, Allen?"

Deciding to ignore her, he shrugs and steps back to the swing. He doesn't mind her around as long as she wouldn't start something but it is late and he is pretty sure that she is just as tired as he is.

His reaction clearly isn't what she has been hoping for, judging by the annoyed huff he hears when he starts to swing again.

"You are an arse," she states bluntly and despite everything he has to smile.

"You c-can join me," Barry offers and nods at the swing next to his.

She studies him with a slightly disgruntled expression which he return with a neutral one. Finally, she shrugs and takes him up on his offer.

"Don't flatter yourself," Lisa grabs a loose hold on both of the chains and starts to pull and push herself slightly back and forth but without her feet losing contact to the ground yet:" You are still a skinny nerd, you are just better company than the piece of shit at home."

Barry doesn't reply and instead pushes himself off the ground with enough force that a sharp pain flashes through his back. He ignores it and instead concentrates on the exhilarating feeling in his stomach.

Lisa snorts very unladylike as she watches him before she too joins in and both of them end up trying to outdo each other by how high they swing. It doesn't last long, maybe a bit more than five minutes before they slow down again and swing at a more moderate pace. He is breathing a bit hard now, which may be due to his injury, lack of sleep or simply because he has next to no stamina.

Gym has never been Barry's favourite subject in school and he knows that most of his peers think of him as a gangly wuss, which probably isn't as far from the truth as he would like it to be.

The air around them has turned a bit cooler and Barry notices the faint smell of rain, which means that the thick blanket of clouds above them would likely not only pass by. He looks up and tries to gauge how much time he still has before he would need to look for another place to stay for the next couple of hours before he could go back.

"Fucking shit weather," grumbles Lisa next to him and she is also looking up to the sky when he glances to her:" It is already April, shouldn't it finally start to get a bit warmer?"

It is then that Barry notices that she has just a short-sleeved t-shirt on. She probably left her home in a hurry as well.

"A-are you c-cold?"

"What do you thing, dimwit?"

The look she gives him is both, slightly amused and quite irritated.

Barry's face grows warm again and he turns back to ground in front of him for a second before he glances to her again.

"Y-you w-want m-my s-sweater?"

Lisa doesn't seem surprised about his offer and she gives him a smile, an actual friendly one.

"You know, you shouldn't be so damn nice all the time, beanpole. People will eventually take advantage of that."

"You a-are w-worried about m-me?"

"Dream on, nerdster."

Barry chuckles as he unzips his sweater and slips out of it.

"It is c-clean, I d-did laundry j-just the other d-day."

"Why am I not surprised?" asks Lisa snarkily as she accepts the clothing. She swiftly puts the sweater on and pulls it close before she lets out an audible shudder:" Fucking hell, why has it to be so ungodly cold?"

It isn't really that cold, at least to Barry, but he keeps this little piece of mind to himself. Instead, he turns back to look in front of him. They fall quiet again, which suits him just fine as the exhaustion he feels slowly but surely makes it difficult to just keep his eyes from closing.

The wind picks up and causes the rustling of the leaves fill the air when it blows through the treetops of the trees surrounding the park. A low rumbling follows and they both look up again.

"Perfect," Lisa sounds annoyed and he really can't hold it against her. He may not be cold now but getting drenched out here could change this very quickly.

"W-we should leave," he remarks quietly and expects the dark looks he gets from the blond pretty girl.

"You can go home to your fucking host-daddy to let him go another round with you but I am certainly not going back to that wasted bastard as long as he hasn't drunk himself into a stupor."

She doesn't want to show it but she is scared. Barry understands that all too well. His back screams when he gets up from the swing, which causes him to wince slightly. Lisa watches him grimly and he isn't sure why but she looks a bit like she feels betrayed by this. He wonders what she is expecting him to do. They aren't exactly friends, just two poor bastards with shitty homes.

A sharp pain turns his attention back to his back and he carefully reaches for the spot below his right shoulder blade, where Jacob scored an especially painful hit. He prods tentatively at it only to nearly grow sick by the sharp pain it causes to shoots through his whole right upper half. Right, he is not going to do that again anytime soon.

"You alright?"

Lisa's glare has been replaced by a still grim but also slightly concerned expression.

"F-fine," Barry decides to keep his right arm close to his body and not to move it too much. He really hopes that nothing but maybe a few of his ribs have been hurt.

"You don't look fine," points Lisa out and gets up:" You look like you are going to make out with the ground any moment now."

"I-I a-am f-f-fine," he huffs and hates how his stammer is starting to act up. It makes him feels so damn stupid.

"Suit yourself," Lisa shrugs and looks up to the sky again. She purses her lips and pulls the thick material of his sweater even closer before she glances over to him.

"You wouldn't mind borrowing me this till tomorrow?"

Barry really isn't keen on the idea to be in the rain with only a shirt on but while he wants to point this out to the girl it doesn't feel right to let her run around in just one either. He sighs lowly and wonders what to do.

A thought comes to his mind and while he isn't too sure about whether it is a good idea or not, it is still better than getting sick in the cold rain. He turns back to the other teenager, who is still glowering at the clouds in a way that makes him thing that she is trying to will them away.

"Lisa, I-I th-think I know a-a p-place to s-stay."

This catches her attention.

"Yeah? Where?" she gives him an appraising look as if she was trying to decide whether she could trust him or not:" And I will kick you in the face if you say in your bed or something similar as stupid."

This takes Barry aback and he just stares at her, not sure how to reply. Lisa snorts once again and shakes her head with a smirk on her lips.

"You sure you are a teenager, beanpole, or am I supposed to be insulted?"

Barry decides that he is going to ignore this question. It makes him uncomfortable and he really doesn't want to end up stammering like a complete fool again, like he does in school more often than not.

"I-it i-is th-the house of m-my n-n-neighb-bour," he explains and tries to ignore the blush that creeps over his cheeks again in embarrassment over how ridiculous he is starting to sound.

Lisa is nice enough to not comment on it and instead turns her attention to what he has said.

"They are on vacation or something?"

Barry's flush deepens, this time more due to nervousness, though, and he averts his eyes.

"N-no," he concedes and shifts his weight from his right foot to his left one:" Sh-she d-died a-about t-two w-weeks a-ago a-and h-her h-house i-is s-still v-vacant."

Silence meets his words and when he nervously glances over at the girl. She is studying him with a mixture of disbelief and horrified amusement. He is just about to apologize and make a quick departure, his sweater be damned, when she barks a brief laugh.

"You are not just a nerd, you a fucking creep too, aren't you, Allen?"

This question causes him to bristle, which isn't lost on Lisa as she quickly adds.

"Which is totally fine by me. At least you aren't as boring as I have thought so far."

She grins and steps closer to him before she links arms with him.

"Let's go to the dead lady's house and see whether her ghost is still around."

Barry can't stop himself from freezing up due to the unexpected contact. Lisa doesn't miss it and let's go of him again.

"No touching?"

Barry shudders slightly and doesn't trust his voice enough to work so that he only shakes his head. Lisa takes it in stride to his surprise and relief and doesn't pry. Instead, she turns towards where the entrance of the park is.

"Let's get on an adventure," she declares and Barry suddenly isn't so sure anymore whether it has been a good idea to offer her to tag along. Seeing that it is too late now to do much about it, he decides to follow the girl that is slowly fading into the darkness.

He probably wouldn't get much sleep tonight.


	4. Annoying Company Is Annoying

A bang causes Barry to startle up from his nap. He quickly pushes himself up to look over to the entrance of the small apartment, his vision still bleary.

His heart slows down when he recognizes the unexpected visitor and he groans unhappily due to be awoken in such an alarming way just because someone isn't able to close a damn door without slamming it.

He lets himself drop back down on the couch which saggy cushions are much too comfortable for him to bother and sit up.

"Hey," he mumbles in an attempt of a greeting before he yawns. The only reply he gets is an amused snort before Mick makes his way over to the small kitchen next door. Barry listens to him opening the fridge to undoubtedly grab one of the beers. Len would get pissed again.

"Len w-will kick your ass," he reminds the other man tiredly and wonders why he even bothers. Mick knows it, of course he does and it is probably exactly the reason why he's taken one in the first place.

"He can try," chuckles Mick as enters the small living room again. Barry listens how he stops next to the couch and glances over to him with an uneasy frown.

"Ye ditched school today, stretch?"

The unloved nickname causes Barry to make a face and glare at him.

"N-no and it i-is c-college."

"Who cares," smirks Mick and takes a pull from the bottle. His expression turns slightly warily then:" You aren't sick, are you? I don't wanna catch anything."

Barry huffs quietly and utters that he is fine, just tired.

"You do look like crap," agrees Mick readily and isn't the least bit fazed by the dark look he gets in return.

"Go aw-way," Barry grumbles sourly and isn't surprised that he is completely ignored.

"Does Snart know you are here?"

"You th-think I've p-picked the lock?" he asks drily but has to smile when the other man chuckles at that.

"Breaking and entering wouldn't make itself too good in a future cop's resume, would it?"

There is slight bite to how Mick says it and Barry frowns unhappily up to him.

"F-forensic s-scientist," he corrects.

Mick only shrugs but doesn't seem like he really wants to start anything again. Instead he walks back to the kitchen. Barry can hear him pull a chair from the small eating table that is crammed between the oven and the wall and wonders whether it would be a good idea to scram now. Len and Mick haven't been on the best of terms since their last job didn't go over so well due to the later man's temper.

The worry slips away when another thought crosses his mind and he looks over to the door.

Slowly, as his body still doesn't want to move, he presses himself in an upright position so that he can see over the backrest of the couch to the kitchen.

"How did you g-get in here?"

Aside from Len, only Lisa has a set of keys to the small apartment and he is pretty sure that the door has been locked.

"Breaking and entering," replies Mick from somewhere behind the entrance to the other room.

Barry frown deepens.

"Y-you p-picked his lock?" he asks incredulously. Mick could be an idiot at times but he has thought so far that the other man has a keener sense of self-preservation for it to allow him to break into Len's flat. He would have his head for it.

"Low-life, remember?"

"You are l-lying."

A chuckles comes from the next room and Barry decides to get up. His mind is too awake for him to be able to fall back asleep now anyway.

He finds Mick sitting at the small table, his gun partly dismantled in front of him. It seems that he decided to clean it, which isn't unusual but Barry doesn't get why he would do it here.

The other man only glances over to him with a smirk before he turns back to his task.

"H-how did you g-get in here, M-Mick?"

"Why are you so concerned about it, stretch?"

Barry purses his lips and crosses his arms in front of his chest.

"Len w-wil get p-pissed and I w-was hoping to c-crash on his c-couch t-tonight."

"And you think he will kick you out because of me?" asks Mick and rises an eyebrow at that.

"N-no, b-but he w-will end up in a n-nasty mood and you know how it is t-to be around him w-when he is l-like that."

"You are pretty picky with the people who are charitable towards you, aren't you, you little shit?" grins the criminal and reaches for his beer to take another pull.

"Y-you are here t-to start something ag-gain?"

The exasperation is clearly audible in his voice but Barry doesn't really care. He knows that Mick wouldn't hurt him, the other man punched him once and Lisa had been livid, which in turn caused Len to make sure that the other criminal is aware that this is a no go.

Mick doesn't seemed annoyed by his inquiry, though. Instead, he smirks once more and shoots him a slightly taunting glance.

"You worried you will end up in the middle of it if I am?"

"S-stop being such an irritating arse," huffs Barry and fights the urge to roll his eyes. He really doesn't get why this man has to be so damn complicated at times.

"Stop pestering me, then."

Deciding that standing here and getting his feathers ruffled wouldn't get him anywhere, Barry gives Mick one last not too friendly look before he returns to the living room.

For the next thirty minutes, the apartment is only filled with the noise of the other man taking care of his weapon and once to move back to the fridge to most likely grab another beer. Barry, who took a seat on the couch again, has returned to the book he had been reading before he decided to rest for a bit. It is a calm but not entirely comfortable atmosphere that has settled in.

The low rumbling noise of thunder catches Barry's attention and he turns towards the window as a familiar dread starts to settle into his stomach. It is already dark outside but he can still make out the raindrops that starts to hit the glass.

"Great," he mumbles quietly and gets up to lower the window shade.

"It is just rain," provides Mick and barks a laugh when he is able to startle Barry badly enough that he actually jumps:" You are such a damn wuss, kid."

Barry glares over to the doorway of the kitchen where the other man has appeared and is now watching him with an amused and slightly taunting grin. He decides to ignore him and instead turns back to the window and, as his luck has it, it is just then when the first lightening finds its way across the sky and briefly bathes everything in a nearly painful brightness. Barry flinches back and his cheeks nearly burn in embarrassment when Mick guffaws again at his expenses.

"Sh-shut up!" hisses Barry angrily as he quickly closes the shade and thus blocks out the storm a little bit at least. He gives the other man a dirty look before he returns to the couch.

"We are inside, no matter what kind of rundown shithole this is, it will prevent you from being hit by lightening," reminds Mick unhelpfully. Barry proceeds ignoring him, at least he intend so, because his unwanted company suddenly makes his way over to him so that he comes to a stop behind just behind him. He warily glances up at him.

"Your boyfriend released another book?"

The questions is about as nonsensical and uncomfortable as Barry has expected. He fights the urge to grab the book that is now resting on the couch table in front of him and hide it from the other man's sight. Mick may have around eight years on him but he is still such an annoying brat at times.

"I l-like to read," he states and inwardly grimaces at how very defensive he sounds.

"Yeah, especially everything from professor four-eyes," agrees Mick and nods towards the book cover. Barry gives him an icy look.

"H-he is a b-brilliant man," he replies curtly but knows that Mick doesn't get it. Lisa doesn't either but Len does, in a way, and this is actually the other man's copy. Barry is pretty sure that he has no intend to read it, though, and mostly bought it for him. While Len is interested in science, it usually is the more practical and already proven kind and not the theoretical partof it that is mostly still just completely out there.

"Yeah, and rich."

"B-because he is s-such a b-brilliant m-man," points Barry out and glances back at the book:" He is a p-pioneer whose w-work w-will change the world."

The other man barks another laugh and eyes him tauntingly.

"For fuck's sake, you are such a pansy, Allen."

Barry doesn't reply. He has had enough of Mick and being called names. He grabs the book while getting up and decides he would spend the rest of the time in Len's bedroom.

The other man doesn't like anybody to go in there but he will gladly take his ire over having to spend another minute in this jackass' company.


	5. Nightly Meetings

The Keys are the part of Keystone City no decent resident would want to be at night. It is a dangerous place where even cops don't like to linger too long after it has gotten dark. Everybody in the Twins knows that.

Barry knows that too, he also knows how reckless it is to walk through a deserted side road this late at night – or early, depending on how you want to look at it – but he is livid enough to don't give a damn. Thus, the small worried voice in the back of his head who persistently tells him to turn around, go back to the party and ask one of the other late teens for their phones so that he could make a call, falls on deaf ears.

He is pretty sure that Len and the others are too smashed by now anyway. They are at the Saloon, which is a bar not too far from where he actually is right now, and he really doesn't need Lisa or anybody else make some snarky comments about how he is nearly a cop now and still seeks out their help.

If things just weren't always so damn complicated…

He doesn't need their help anyway. He knows how to find his way around here, he has so more times than he cares to count, and he definitely doesn't fit into the demographic that gangs and other low-life usually tends to go after.

With his likely broken nose and bloody shirt, he looks probably nothing like a potential victim who has anything to offer. A good thing, really, as he doesn't want to get stabbed or beaten to a pulp for money he doesn't own.

At least the weather is nice, still cool but not cold anymore and, most of all, it isn't raining. This would be just the icing of the damn cake.

The sound of his steps echo off the walls of the building around him and while he is pretty certain that most criminals wouldn't bat an eye on him, he is still wary enough to keep his ears open and listen for any odd noises. The night is quiet, though, apart from the sound of a few cars passing by at the main road nearby every once and again.

It is oddly soothing, just listen to the low hum of the city around him that usually brims with life. It seems that even the Gems calm down around half past two in the morning.

The pain of his nose has lost most of its edge by now. It still hurts, even just breathing, but he is familiar with it and doesn't pay it too much attention. What has him worried, though, is his right cheekbone. Pierce is a huge hulking arsehole and it wouldn't surprise him in the least if that damn bastard has broken it.

If words get out of what has happened tonight, it would definitely turn him into even more of an oddball to the other students. Not that this is something-

Barry picks up on voices close-by. He frowns and slows down as he tilts his head a bit to the right while he listens.

There are definitely two girls, maybe more, which is unusual and concerning for this place and time. The other voices belong to men, probably three, which doesn't necessarily mean anything but Barry knows that it probably does and he can just imagine what is about to happen there. He frowns and hesitates for a moment to consider his options.

Walking away would be the easy way out and sounds alluring but he can't do it, he could never walk away from a situation like this. Calling for help would likely be the most sensible thing to do but he owns no mobile phone and there is nobody else around he could ask for doing the call or to use their phone at this time.

Perfect…

With a low huff, he speeds his steps up again and walks towards the direction where the girls and their probably unwanted suitors are. He still hopes that it turns out as nothing more than a group of friends or acquaintances, something harmless.

Barry isn't surprised when he comes closer that he is able to pick up on the audible forced calm tone with which one of the girls speaks and the underlying fear. It is just his luck. Getting one beating is probably not enough for tonight, he thinks bitterly. His self-pity is quickly pushed into the back of his mind and he starts to scan the ground for anything he could use as a weapon.

There is a lot of garbage but nothing like a rod or something he would have liked to find. Instead, he picks up a solid looking glass bottle and shoves it under his wide sweater so that he wouldn't cause those guys to get aggressive by accident in the first place.

The voices have picked up by now, one of the girls, not the one from before, is asking the guys to let them go. She sounds a tipsy and clearly scared.

"But baby-girl, we just want to play a little bit," replies one of the men and another one agrees.

"You passed through our place, cupcake, the least you could do compensate for it is to spend a bit time with me and my buddies."

"We don't want any trouble," states the other girl firmly, the one who he has heard speaking before.

"Are you telling me, we are trouble?"

Barry, who has reached the corner behind which trouble is waiting, feels the urge to scoff and roll his eyes. He hates arseholes like that and the fact that they are probably getting off by scaring to young women. Bastards.

"N-no, Iris didn't mean it like that," assures the other girl frightened and drunkenly and yelps a second later, which causes the other one to order one of the men to let go of her friend. Barry glances around the corner and sees that there are indeed three men, probably early twenties, who are cornering two young women. The smaller blond one has been grabbed by her hips by a guy with a crimson hoody and a baseball cap with the CC Stars logo on it. His loose clothes make it hard to estimate his weight but he seems to be on the leaner site, like Barry, and smaller than him.

That man also has a triangle tattooed on his right cheekbone, which means gang members. Barry's night is really getting better and better, it seems. He can use this to his advantage, though, if he plays it right. He knows of this gang.

The other woman, who has to be Iris, is African-American and he can immediately tell that she is not nearly as drunk as her friend. She also very visibly tries not to appear intimidated by the tall guy who is currently standing in front of her, so close that he could easily grab her if he wanted to.

"We can be trouble, Cacao, to both, you and your white little friend."

"Touch her and-"

"And what? What are you going to do, Cacao?"

The guy is enjoying goading her and Barry is impressed when she doesn't back off.

"I will make sure that you are going to regret it."

Howling laugher cuts through the otherwise silence of the night and makes it clear that these men doesn't take her words any more serious than was to be expected.

"I think this little black doll needs to learn a lesson regarding respecting her men."

Barry sneers at that bull at the same time as the young woman does. He really doesn't want to listen to any more of this garbage. It is time to interfere now, anyway, as those idiots are clearly keen on having some fun and they seem to have run thin on patience.

"H-hey," he steps around the corner and tries to keep his voice as levelled and calm as possible:" Here you are, Iris, I h-have been looking for you t-two for n-nearly twenty minutes now."

He gives the clearly confused and wary woman a meaningful look and is glad that her friend only stares at him as if she was trying to remember who he is. Then, he turns to the other men and frowns.

"You f-found yourself quite some c-company it seems."

"Who the fuck are you, retard? Piss off if you don't wanna end up with a knife in your guts," hisses the man closes to Iris and actually bares his teeth at him.

"You clearly don't know wh-who those t-two lovely l-ladies are, d-do you?"

"You can go fuck yourself, you little faggot-"

Barry has been called a faggot more than enough for one night and brusque cuts him off.

"Y-you and your friends are m-members of the Sunny Yee. Your l-leader is M-Mike Vang wh-who is also quite a good friend of Leonard Snart and his l-little gang of misfits and now t-take two g-guesses whose g-girlfriends y-you are just about to rape?"

A taken aback silence follows. The three guys stare at him in a mixture of incredulity and wariness and Barry knows that Len would have his head if he got him somehow mixed up in this should those idiots mention any of this to their colleagues. Len and the others are currently starting to make a name for themselves, they are well-known enough that people in their circles can recognize them by now but they are still far away to be anything close to a big fish in the pond that are the Gems and trouble with one of KC's bigger gangs could get dangerous for them.

Still, Barry hasn't been lying. Len knows Vang in an "I scratch your back, you scratch my back" kind of way. They aren't exactly friends, Len doesn't do friends, at least that is what he likes to tell others, but they have gotten wasted together often enough that people know that they don't hate each other either.

Barry hopes that those three in front of him do so as well and actually believe him.

"Jake," the guy, who has been holding the blond woman and has let go of her by now and taken a small step back, gives the other man who has been talking to Barry a worried look:" I don't wanna get in trouble with the boss over some stupid chicks."

"Shut the fuck up, you coward," hisses Jack back and shoots his friend or whatever a warning glare before he turns back to Barry with a sneer:" And why should we believe you little sissy boy? I don't know your scrawny little arse and I don't trust people I don't know."

Jack makes a threatening step in his direction and gives him a nasty grin that is all teeth.

"And I think you are lying, you little shit. It's in your eyes, you look nervous and scared and I don't think a motherfucker like Snart would even waste any time on a wuss like you," he sneers again:" But you aren't stupid, aren't you? You know that we are dangerous and you really should be pissing your pants by now because nobody fucks with me, especially not if it's about me getting some pussy."

Barry feels his stomach drop. It is obvious that those guys wouldn't simply heed his words and leave. Well, it would have been too good to be true, considering the likelihood of such a scheme to work.

He adjusts his stance a bit and readies himself for the gang member to attack. His hand has closed firmly around the neck of the bottle and he briefly has to think of Mark, who showed him where to aim with a blunt object like this in case you face someone who is superior to your strength. He has taken some self-defence courses for college to get electives but they are never as practical or brutal and thus as effective as what he has picked up from the likes of Mark or Mick. Of course not, the instructors clearly don't want him to end up in jail for killing someone while attempting to protect himself.

Right now, he tries not to bother too much about the consequences this could have for him. Right now, his problems are not to get stabbed and beaten to a bloody pulp or to let those girl get hurt.

Barry can nearly hear Len sneer in his ear about what a fucking idiot he is for getting himself in trouble for two bimbos who are stupid enough to get themselves into this situation in the first place. He gives his head a slight shake and turns him out.

The important thing is to stay calm. Staying calm and to watch because he can't allow himself to miss anything his opponent is doing.

The girl, Iris, says something, she sounds urgent and worried and he is pretty sure it is on his behalf. He feels bad for her. She certainly didn't start this night out with the expectation to end up in this situation.

Jake suddenly jumps at him, one hand clenched into a fist – he has the word "F-U-C-K" tattooed onto his knuckles and Barry nearly has to snort about how corny it is – and the other one holding a knife.

His initial idea to smash the bottle into the other man's temple is replaced by deflecting the knife with it and thus probably breaking some of the bones in his attacker's hands, judging by how he is howling in pain for a second before he lets out a furious scream and is onto him again.

The knife is gone, which is an incredible improvement of Barry's chance to not die here, but the guy still has his good fist and he certainly can pack a punch.

The right side of his face bursts up in white-hot flames of pain and Barry has no doubt about his cheekbone being broken anymore. The momentum of the punch is strong enough for him to stumble backwards and then Jake is onto him, ripping him to the ground, which causes him to see starts for a couple of seconds when the back of his head connects with the cement hard.

"-ucking worm think you can hurt me!? I will smash your fucking teeth out for this!"

Barry tries to shield his face as good as possible but the guy is strong and knows how to angle his punches. A whistling in his ears picks up and he can faintly make out the young woman, Iris, scream for the man to stop.

Great hero he turns out to be, he probably made the whole affair much more horrible for the poor girls because now they would also witness someone being beaten to death in front of their eyes. God, why couldn't he be a bit stronger? Why is he so absurdly bad at fighting? He can nearly hear Mick laughing at him for how quickly he has gone down.

The pain in his skull has started to lose some of its edge, which probably is not a good sign, seeing that Jake is still beating the living daylight out of him.

Barry thinks of the presentation he still hasn't finished for one of his courses, of the exam he would have had the day after tomorrow, of Lisa and her snarky quips about him trying to be a hero and how this would cost him his head one of these days. He thinks of Len and how he sometimes takes hold of his wrist, just ever so lightly and briefly, and how these moments seem to be the only ones where he is really uncertain about something.

He thinks of the man in yellow and how thickly humid the air that late afternoon has been out there at the vacant playground. He thinks of his parents who he has never gotten to known…

"Stop! You are killing him! Please!"

It is the girl, Iris, and she sounds really scared now. It is like he is under water, her voice sounds oddly far away and faint, even though he is certain that she has to be screaming.

Then the punches stop and for a moment there is nothing but a deafening and shocked silence before someone starts to scream in horror and agony.

Barry tries to move but his first attempt tells him that it probably would not come to this anytime soon. His head feels like it is made out of lead and it is about the same with the rest of his body. Even prying his eyes open turns out to be a nearly monumental task and it takes him a second to realize that it has to be at least partly due to them having starting to swell shut.

Slowly, agonizingly so, he lifts a hand and flinches as soon as his fingertips touch his cheek. It is as if a spell is lifted and suddenly everything hurts like hell again. He groans in pain and squeezes his eyes shut again. His head seems to have been close to be cracked and he knows how fucking lucky he is that he is still alive. Maybe in a horrible lot of pain, but still breathing.

"-u hear me?"

A voice reaches his heavier getting mind and the notion of being under water gets stronger. Barry is still able to recognize it. It is the girl, Iris, and he is grateful that it is not her who is still screaming in the background.

"Iris, we have to go!"

The other girl, seemingly also alright by the sound of it.

"Don't be stupid, Amy," huffs Iris and Barry is pretty sure if he were able to crack on eye open again, he would have seen her glare at her friend:" He helped us and he is hurt, we can't just leave him here and I've already called the police."

"But I don't wanna stay here!" the other girl, Amy, protests angrily before she starts to sob:" Wh-what if it comes back and will kill us too?"

Barry has no idea what she is talking about. Then, he remembers Jake and the other two guys and frowns briefly, which causes a sharp pain to flash through his head so that he immediately regrets to have moved at all.

"Don't move, you are hurt," Iris tells him before she seems to turn to her friend again:" They aren't dead, Amy, and… let's just wait for the police, okay?"

"Your dad will be so angry and he will totally tell mine and then Josh will learn about this," Amy cries and her sobs start to get worse:" I will be in so much trouble."

Barry listens how Iris sighs heavily and it hits him how outstandingly collected and calm she seems despite what has just happened. She does sound scared but nowhere near as much as such a situation would have called for.

With some effort, he pries his left eye open again – his right has probably swollen shut by now – and glances up at the woman to see that she is looking at something else with a clearly unsettled expression.

"Fucking shit! Help me get that damn knife out, you damn bitches!"

Barry isn't able to move enough to see who is screaming at them. He bets that it is Jake, though. The pain is thick in his voice and distorts it in an odd way that makes it sound alien to how he has sounded before, but Barry is sure that it is the other man. There is still the familiar anger to it.

Iris glares at the unseen person and Barry thinks that she mutters that it should have been his groin and not his hand that has gotten stabbed. He wonders what she is talking about and what is actually going on. How is he not dead yet and why are the two young woman still unharmed?

His mind grows heavier and his eye slips close again just as Iris looks down at him. Their gaze meet for a brief second and he thinks that she has a really kind and warm eyes.

"You have to stay with me!" she tells him urgently:" You can't fall asleep… Can you tell me your name?"

She sounds really worried about him and it makes him feel guilty but at the same time it is oddly nice as well. It causes him to crack a smile despite how moving any muscle in his face hurts.

"Barry," he utters quietly and listens to her repeat it.

The sound of police sirens reach them just as he slips off into unconsciousness.


	6. The Burned Man

S.T.A.R. labs is an impressive facility, not just by its sheer size but also all the knowledge and technological and scientific innovation that is flourishing behind its walls.

Its staff consists of over fifty scientists and nearly the double amount of engineers, all of them the best of their fields. Over the last decade the laboratories and everything they stand for have become a popular enough part of Central City that there are now guided tours available through part of the facility's upper layers. All of them are free, every couple of weeks for school classes and once a month for people in general.

Barry has driven both, Iris and Lisa nuts by how many times he convinced – begged – them to accompany him to those over the last couple of years. It has always been an insanely delighting experience for him, a bit like entering a different world he could completely forget about anything else while indulging in his love for science.

Today, kneeing next to the dead body of a man that is hardly older than him, and looking for any evidence that could give them a hint to who has killed him, the spacious and bright entrance area doesn't hold the same appeal or fascination.

"You sure that is not one of your guys?"

Detective Chyre sounds gruff, like he usually does when he is unsettled by a case. The look with which he eyes the female scientist is more a scowl than anything else and Barry glances over to the woman, who tries to appear collected but isn't fooling anybody. It doesn't surprise him, he himself has never seen a corpse with such a mangled face before either.

"We already told you, Detective," interject the young ginger man who has introduced himself as Dr Hartley Rathaway when he joined them just a few minutes ago:" We don't know who this man is. There is nobody missing of our staff."

He sounds terse and annoyed, most likely to how much this situation has interrupted their usually smooth fund of the day. The corpse of a man, whose upper body has nearly burned to cinder, turning up in your entrance hall is probably something nobody is prepared to deal with.

"You are certain of that? There are quite a few people working at this place, after all."

Hartley turns to Detective West with an expression people usually reserve for cockroaches.

"Yes, Detective, indeed there are. What an incredibly acute observations of you, I am certain this skill helped you getting your current position, didn't it?"

"Hartley," says the brunette scientist next to him a low but warning tone. He colleague glares briefly at her but seems somewhat more collected when he addresses Joe again, who takes the younger man's temper with the same calm he usually shows when he deals with people like him.

"We are certain that this man, whoever he may be, is not one of us."

"So, that means someone dropped a corpse in here for no apparent reason at all? There have been no threat or anything like that? " asks Chyre incredulously.

"It seems so, yes," agrees the scientist and clearly struggles to keep the hostility in his voice as low as possible.

They go on like this for a while and Barry stops listening. He has heard this kind of conversations a lot over the one and a half years he has been working for the CCPD now. It is understandable that nobody wants to be involved with something like this and people could get quite defensive in these circumstances even when they had nothing to hide.

Carefully, he takes a sample of the dirt the dead man has under his fingers and tries not to move them too much. It is a silly thing to worry about hurting a dead person but a couple of his have been broken badly enough that two actually show the white of bones and the ring finger of his right hand is completely gone. Barry doesn't even want to imagine how painful this must have been for this man.

"Someone seems to have hold quite a grudge against this guy."

Joe's sudden appearance next to him startles Barry a bit.

"You've got anything from our John Doe so far?"

A brief glance to where the detective has been before, shows that the two scientists have left and that Chyre is gone as well. He turns back to Joe.

"No, there is n-nothing on him that would help t-to identify him."

The clothes their John Doe is wearing are odd but they have no labels and are badly enough burned that it is difficult to say anything without reconstructing them.

"I w-will need to run his fingerprints through the database if th-there is still enough left of them or use his d-dental impression," remarks Barry as he sits back onto his heals.

"Well, he definitely had a thing for red," remarks Joe and nods towards the dead man's legs that are the least burned parts of him.

"L-looks like l-leather," he agrees:" Or an-nother very a sturdy material, anyway."

Joe hums quietly and takes a sip of the paper cup of coffee he has gotten from the coffee vending machine close to the entrance. He considers the dead man for a moment before he looks back to Barry.

"So the obvious cause for death is burning but have you found something that indicates anything else."

"I can tell you th-that he hasn't been sh-shot or stabbed but there are clear signs of violence."

Barry nods to the mutilated hands before he looks back to Joe with an uneasy frown.

"I also th-think that it w-was probably something personal, his murderer w-wanted to hurt him."

The older man hums again before he asks Barry whether he is about finished here.

"Yes, I've got all the evidence there is. Why, you have something else for him?"

"Dr Snow let slip that a colleague of her informed her shortly before our arrival that it seems like a quarrel actually has taken place in some of the laboratories downstairs," explains Joe with a slight smirk:" Dr Rathaway hasn't been all that pleased about it."

"He tried to hide it?"

"No, I think he really hasn't known of it yet but it certainly didn't improve that brat's mood."

Barry puts the last of his collected evidence back into his little portable lab-suitcase and gets up.

"You want me to look at it?"

"If you were so kindly," agrees Joe with a smirk as Barry pulls off his gloves.

"Not that I have a problem with it but w-what is about Anderson and M-Martin?"

He looks around and is surprised when he can't spot either of his colleagues who have still been here just minutes before.

"They are already taking a look."

Barry turns to Joe with a frown and asks somewhat warily:" So, how many are "some of the laboratories downstairs", then?"

"About twelve," tells him the detective with a slight grimace but adds that Melton and Baxter are already on their way.

"They went th-through twelve rooms before ending up here?"

That seems both odd and slightly unbelievable. How could none of the security guards have picked up on the ruckus that had to accompany such a fight?

"It appears so," agrees Joe and starts to make his way over to the elevator as soon as Barry has picked up his suitcase:" And do you want to know what the funny thing about it is?"

"Probably n-not but shoot."

The other man pushes the button to call their lift as he explains to him that this seems to be some kind of locked room puzzle.

"Dr Snow explained to us that the door every laboratory in that section has been locked during last night and, according to their supervision system, not a single one of them has been activated till after the security spotted the dead man."

"Are there any other signs of entry?"

This case seems to get odder by the minutes, decides Barry as he follow Joe into the elevator cab. Not that Dr Snow's statement needs to mean much as their system could just have had a bug or they used some alternative ways of entry, even though this seems rather unlikely if they really went through twelve laboratories. Breaking and entering needs time, after all, especially with such highly secured places like S.T.A.R. laboratories.

"They say no but we both know that someone can't just teleport from one room to the next."

The elevator comes to a halt and they enter a floor that runs long to either side of them, showing plain white walls that hold an entrance to what are probably labs about every ten feet. It has a clean and rather cold atmosphere to it and reminds Barry a little bit of a hospital.

Many people speculate that this scientific facility is much bigger than what is public knowledge and as Barry lets his gaze move down to the right of him, where the floor seems to end far enough away that it probably would take him a few minutes to get there, he decides that they are probably on to something with this suspicion. He would love to learn more about this place, even though he knows how unlikely it is for any of the people who work here to tell him more than they offer on the tours upstairs. A pity, really.

"You can daydream after work, Barry," says Joe and catches his attention. The older cop nods towards where he can spot Chyre not too far from them, about four labs to their left, where the other detective is currently talking to a young man, who can't be more than a couple of years older than Barry, as well as Dr Snow, Dr Rathaway and-

Barry decides that, of course, there could have been no other way for him to meet Dr Wells – THE fricking Dr Wells in person – than on the day he had no fresh laundry left and just grabbed one of the least smelling shirts to put on this morning.

Fantastic…

His steps slow down and he stops a bit behind Joe, hoping that nobody would pay him any attention.

"I am Detective West," introduces Joe himself and shakes hands with Dr Well, who obviously is the person of authority in this little circle.

"Dr Harrison Wells," replies the tall man with a pleasant smile and Barry nearly jumps out of his skin when his eyes suddenly flicker over to him and meet his for a second. Before he has any time to react, the scientist has his attention back to the Detective again, though.

"You partner already informed me that this investigation would probably take up to a couple of hours."

"Yes, with the area that has to be looked at it will take a considerable amount of time," agrees Joe and Barry knows the look he gives the doctor, which causes his heart to sink a bit, because he really doesn't understand what has him mistrust the scientist mere seconds after meeting him for the first time.

"Of course, you can count on my staff's complete support," assures Dr Wells and doesn't sound like he is nervous or trying to hide anything to Barry.

"I am glad to hear that. I am sure we will be out of your hair before noon, then."

"Good," Dr Wells appears clearly pleased by that and nods to his employees:" Just ask one of my colleagues if you need anything."

"We will do that."

"You have anywhere else to be right now, doctor?" interjects Chyre.

"After what has happened last night there are a couple of things for me to take care of," agrees Dr Wells calmly:" It can wait, though, should you need my assistance."

Joe waves him off before Chyre can replay.

"No its fine. I am certain Dr Snow and Dr Rathaway will provide enough help."

"Good, I will leave you to your work then."

Barry feels both, a bit disappointed and quite relieved as he watches Dr Wells leave. A small part of him also has expected him to at least glance at him again, which immediately makes him feels like an idiot, because why would this man find him interesting even in the slightest. He's met his eyes before but it probably was just a coincidence and means nothing.

It is a good thing that Lisa isn't here because he is sure she would have picked up on this and would have proceeded to make fun of him for the fascination he holds for Dr Well till Barry was ready to strangle her.

He jumps slightly when someone touches his arm and quickly turns back to Joe, who is frowning at him now.

"Everything okay?"

"S-sure, just… its nothing, just was i-in m-my own mind for a m-moment," he stammers and his cheeks heat up uncomfortably because he knows that all eyes are on him now.

"Well, then try to stay in the here and now because I have just told Dr Snow that you will take a look at one of the labs."

"Of c-course," agrees Barry quickly and gives the woman an uncertain smile which she returns with a frown.

Yes, that would be him, Barry Allen, a total klutz at making first impressions…

"That is a CSI?" asks Dr Rathaway in audible incredulity:" Is he even out of college yet?"

Right here and now, Barry decides, that he really doesn't like this man, especially because he can hardly be more than a year older than he is.

"Barry may be young but he still is one of our brightest investigators," assures Joe confidently and gives the ginger haired man a look that makes it obvious that he found the comment about Barry's age also quite ridiculous.

The little group disperses after that with Joe and Chyre following Hartley and the other man, whose name he hasn't learned yet, while Barry follows Dr Snow. He is surprised when she leads him back to the elevator.

"Not all of concerning labs are on this floor," she explains when she notices his look.

"Does your surveillance system show w-whether the elevators have been used in this area last night?"

"The security uses them to reach the different floors while they make their rounds," explains Dr Snow as she leads him into another floor white floor:" Your colleagues are still talking to them to find out whether their usage of them fits with the ones that have been recorded."

"What about the footage of the surveillance cameras?"

Dr Snow purses her lips for a moment before she explains that someone seems to have tampered with them.

"All the c-cameras?"

"No, just the ones in and close to the concerning areas."

"I see," he looks around and frowns when he notices that they seem to be the only ones around:" Am I the f-first one to investigate d-down here?"

"It seems so," agrees the brunette woman curtly as she stops next to a lab entrance and Barry wonders whether she is always this standoffish. He regrets the notion a moment later because having a burned corpse turn up at your working place is probably not something any person would take all that well.

The lab they enter is big, much bigger than the ones in college have been or his current one at the CCPD is. It remembers him a bit of the one he once saw during an excursion to a chemical plant but he thinks that even those couldn't have been this spacious. They have been definitely tidier, though, as this one is in an utter disarray. It looks a bit like a hurricane has moved through it and again he wonders how nobody could have picked up on any of this.

"A-are the laboratories soundproofed?"

"No but it would be still hard to hear anything that is happening here in one of the other floors," Dr Snow explains and nods upwards:" The ceilings of the single levels are very thick and sturdy in case of an explosion."

"I see."

Barry briefly wonders whether an explosion is something that happens here more often while he lets his gaze move through the room to take the chaos in.

"Is there anyth-thing t-toxic or otherwise dangerous in here I have to be aware of?"

"No, this has been one of the botanical laboratories," Dr Snow explains and points to some of the scattered plants and heaps of earth and broken pots that are on the ground:" None of them are any more lethal than stinging nettle."

This is kind of a relief as it is always easier to work somewhere he doesn't have to worry about death by some scientific experiment.

He looks back to her.

"Are you going to stay?"

"I will be in the laboratory next doors but you can just come and fetch me if you need something."

He nods in agreement and watches the doctor take her leave before turning back to the big room in front of him.

This is definitely going to take a while.


	7. Meeting You For The First Time

"What do you mean you have to go back there? You promised me you would be here like twenty minutes ago and now you have to do a damn all-nighter again!?"

Lisa's annoyance is thick in her voice and Barry wishes she would not always make this more complicated for him. It isn't as if he wants to sit out their movie night.

"Barry, why can't you tell that stupid Director of yours that he can do his dirty work on his own? Don't let those people always push you around, for Pete's sake!"

He bites down on a sigh and pulls out the appropriate amount of money for the taxi-driver. It is already after six and the sky has started to darken a while ago so that he is able to make out quite a few stars through the window.

"I am s-sorry, Lisa, really. I w-will make it up to you, okay?"

"Great, makes me feel so much better, you know?" grouses his friend and he has to fight the urge to roll his eyes:" I could have gone out and have some fun, Roscoe actually asked me out and I was dumb enough not to accept it because I thought we already had something planned, which, as it seems, is not the case because you are not able to say no to people!"

Barry notices the amused glance the driver gives him via the rear-view mirror and wonders how his ears haven't started to bleed yet with how loud Lisa's voice has been getting over the last couple of minutes. Then he actually picks up on what his friend has just said and frowns.

"You mean Dillon? Roscoe Dillon?" he asks her and lowers his own voice a bit as he does so:" You do know that Len is going to strange him if he ever finds out that he has asked you out, Lisa."

"Pish-posh, my dear brother and his dumb protector complex can go jump off a roof as far as I care," she exclaims flippantly:" I am a grown woman, Bar, it is none of his damn business with whom I go out and whom I actually f-"

"Lisa, I know!" he cuts her off and pinches the bridge of his nose:" I am j-just saying that Len has b-been in a r-rather bad mood for a w-while now and he and D-Dillon t-tend to lock horns. M-maybe you want to t-treat this with some caution, okay?"

"Well, maybe I wouldn't have to consider calling Roscoe if you actually have turned up as you have promised you would."

This time he actually groans and slides a bit lower in the backseat of the cab.

"I have to buy you d-dinner to make up for this, don't I?"

"What do you think, genius?"

He snorts.

"Dinner it is."

"Good, because I am a damn hot and highly coveted bachelorette who really doesn't need to spend her Friday nights at home alone."

"I know, Lisa," he sighs and notices that they have just reached the exit that leads to the S.T.A.R. laboratories.

"And I am not going to make do with some stupid cheap pizza place, I actually want to go somewhere classy like an actual Greek restaurant or where they serve Sushi," goes his friend on.

"Lisa, you d-don't even like S-Sushi."

"I do," she protests indignantly:" I ate it just last time we went to the CCSM."

"That was fried makizushi, which is a contradiction in itself and it doesn't count."

"It does too! You vain sap!"

Barry hands the driver the couple of ten dollar bills and grabs his suitcase before exiting the car.

"Alright, we w-will go somew-where they serve fried Sushi," he says as he watches the taxi drive off and turns to the main entrance of the huge facility:" I have to stop now, Lisa, I am at S.T.A.R. labs and if I don't r-really want to end up doing an a-all-nighter I am b-better going to start r-right away."

"Fine," huffs Lisa:" But I will hold you to your promise."

"Yes, I know you by now Lisa and you sh-should know by now as well that I a-always keep them."

"Well, expect the ones like this one, hm?" asks his friend but cuts him off before he has the opportunity to defend himself:" It is fine, Bar, just don't get yourself blown up there, okay? There is a reason why they put that thing so far away from the rest of the city."

"I will try my best but can't m-make any promises."

"Har-har, dumbass."

"I will call you tomorrow."

"Not before noon, I am not planning on spending tonight at home like a sad little wall-flower just because you have stood me up."

Barry takes the earphones off after ending the call and pushes them and his phone into his right jacket pocket as he makes his way over to the glass entrance.

There aren't many people around and his gaze briefly moves over to where he has collected evidence this morning. Any traces of the murder that has happened approximately a bit more than twelve hours ago are gone and it is a bit odd how ordinary a place like this can look like just after such a short amount of time.

The man at the reception desk frowns as Barry explains to him why he is here. He eyes him for a moment as if he wasn't sure whether this is supposed to be a prank or not. This causes the words of the ginger haired doctor to come back to his mind and how sceptical he seemed about him due to his age.

Great, this again…

Barry can't help but return the rude man's unfriendly expression and show him his identification once again.

"You can c-call the d-department if you must b-but I think you would s-save both of us a lot of time if y-you would just call f-for s-someone to get me to the crime scene so th-that I can get out of your hair and finish here before m-midnight."

The receptionist gives him a dark look before he reaches for the phone and Barry is pretty sure that he doesn't care all that much for the tone he has just used. Too bad, he certainly isn't going to pull overtime just because of some close-minded idiot.

About five minutes later one of the three elevators to the right of the reception desk open and it becomes clear to Barry that whatever deity is up there really doesn't mean well with him today.

"They sent you?"

Barry bites down on a groan and picks his equipment case up.

"Dr R-Rathaway," he says in lieu of an actual greeting and walks up to where the other man has stopped shortly after exiting the elevator.

"No, really. They couldn't send someone about five years your senior?" asks the doctor before he huffs and seems close to throwing his hands up in the air:" Fine, whatever, I just don't see why we even bother to get the police involved in the first place if they clearly don't take any of this serious."

"It w-was reported that there is an-nother room that shows traces of a fight w-we haven't investigated yet," says Barry and stubbornly tries to ignore that jackass' insults. What the hell is that man's problem? They haven't even talked so far! Stupid arse…

He certainly feels for anybody who has to actually work with that prick.

"I know that, believe me, otherwise I would already have suggested to Hans," the ginger haired man nods to the man behind the reception:" To call the security and get you out of here. This is no damn library or Walmart for people to hang out. We do actually science in here."

Wow, Barry has the unfortunate luck to meet quite a number of big-headed people so far but that guy certainly plays in a whole different league.

"Well, seeing that you are wasting both of our times here, I would suggest that we get you to your destination, shall we?"

Barry purses his lips and nods tersely. He follows the redhead into the elevator and watches with a surprised frown how the doctor pulls out a card and flickers it over a scanner below the display next to the door that is used to select the different floors. It causes a number of smaller windows to appear on it.

The young redhead gives him a clearly annoyed glare when he notices that he is paying attention but keeps from commenting. Instead, he starts to choose a number of windows before the display's setup changes again and vertical string of numbers appear. It takes Barry a moment to realize that this actually seem to be extra levels below to the ones you can usually reach with the elevator.

"H-how many levels are there?" he asks without thinking, too surprised by the simple fact that there are more than what he has thought to be the case so far. He feels a bit like in a Mario game where he discovered a secret sub-level for the first time.

Unfortunately, Dr Rathaway doesn't seem to take kind to his question and actually sneers at him this time.

"You can't even read numbers? What does the display show you?"

"There is r-really no r-reason f-for your host-tility," Barry grits out angrily:" I w-want t-to b-be out of here j-just as quick as you w-want to get r-rid of m-me, b-believe m-me."

An odd expression crosses the other man's face that is just too familiar to Barry. He could kick himself for how his damn stammer is always getting worse when he gets upset and how ridiculous this makes him look. The last thing he wants is this schmuck's pity.

They proceed downwards in silence after the doctor has selected one of the numbers – the fourth floor underground – and Barry is quite grateful for it. He knows that he would probably do something stupid if his current companion would open his mouth again right now.

"This way," grumbles the other man after they have exited the elevator and Barry follows him through another brightly lit corridors but notices that the walls are tinted in a very soft blue. He wonders whether this has any actual meaning but decides against asking. He has quite enough of biting remarks or outright insults for tonight.

This time, they walk for nearly five minutes and pass a couple of other scientists in white lab coats from whom every single one eyes Barry in a curious way before the doctors slows down and they stop in front of one of the many laboratory entrances. He opens the door via another flick of his card over a scanning device and they enter.

"Here," says Dr Rathaway with a slightly distasteful expression.

The room is smaller than the one Barry has been working in earlier today. It is also very tidy and there are no signs of a fight so that he isn't sure what he is supposed to look at.

"Over there," huffs the ginger annoyed and nods towards one of the shelves that fill the back of the room. Barry frowns and doesn't understand why the man couldn't just tell him what it is. He decides that standing here isn't going to get him out of here any earlier and makes his way over to the area in question to take a look of his own.

His stomach sinks as he comes to a stop next to the last shelf and realizes why the CCPD has been contacted again. Back there at the wall that has been hidden behind the shelves is a huge dark stain at the wall, high enough that it actually reaches from a bit above Barry's eye-level to nearly all the way down to the ground and close to oval in shape. Around it an odd looking pattern runs across nearly all of the wall that seems to origin from the spot and proceeds to faint out towards it ends. It remembers him a bit of the look of freshly dug out roots and he knows that he has seen this before, even during one investigation on a farm outside CC, where a lightening has struck a metal pole.

Barry studies the familiar coloration of the strain itself and while he can't be sure just yet, he thinks that it is most likely blood. The lack of any metallic smell suddenly hits him and he steps closer but promptly halts again to checking the floor for any evidence he could destroy by accidently stepping on it.

To his surprise, there is no trace of blood whatsoever or anything else that could lead to an explanation to how the strange image at the wall came to be. He frowns in confusion before looking back to the doctor who has followed by now.

"D-did you leave the room j-just as you've found it?"

"Do you really need me to answer that?"

"It i-is important for the investigation t-to be s-sure th-"

"Oh for god's sake, yes, the damn room is just as one of my colleagues found it a couple of hours ago. Nobody came in here, not even the damn cleaning lady."

Barry turns back to the wall and steps closer. He puts his black equipment case down and fetches two of the disposable gloves.

Carefully, he touches the fall with the tips of his index- and middle-finger before looking for any traces of blood or anything else left behind on them. There are none. He reaches for one of the sealable plastic test tubes and a spatula to scratch a bit of the dried substance off. As soon as some of it is in the tube, he picks one of the small chemical bottles and adds three drops of its solution. The liquid turns turquoise and he hums softly to himself. He closes it again and puts it back into the case before he reaches for his thermostat next.

"Is the temperature of the r-room constantly regulated to be 65 °F?"

"Yes," agree Dr Rathaway who has been watching him rather curiously now:" Why?"

"Blood, esp-pecially this amount of it, would not have d-dried within the l-last twenty-four hours at this temperature."

"It is blood?"

There is audible disdain in the other man's voice and Barry thinks about asking what he has expected but keeps it to himself.

"Y-yes. Quite a lot of it judging by how thick the layer seems to be," he agrees instead and starts to movie his gaze up to the ceiling, looking for anything that could indicate how any of this came to be, before he lets his eyes slowly wander through the room.

"Wonderful, fucking wonderful," mutters the scientist but Barry pays him no attention as he makes his way back toward the centre of the room, still searching for a trace of… something.

"And what do you mean that it shouldn't have dried yet? I can assure you that there wasn't any man-sized bloodspot around last night, I have been here myself briefly before midnight yesterday."

Barry shrugs and starts to slowly walk through the lab, looking over the shelves and the vials of chemicals.

"You d-didn't exch-change any of the vials s-since this incident?" he asks and turns back to Dr Rathaway who gives him a dirty look for not answering his question.

"Why the hell would we do that? None of them have been damaged, have they?"

Barry hums quietly and turns back to the chemicals in front of him.

"Have you suddenly become unable to answer questions, Mr Allen?"

He huffs quietly and signs to the wall with the stain.

"This p-pattern you can make out around the blood i-is usually a side-effect of very high electrical voltage, like by lightening. This amount of current should have caused a reaction with the chemicals close to it."

"Lightening," repeats the other man and gives him an incredulous look:" In here?"

"Or any other p-process that causes the n-necessary current flow," returns Barry curtly and can't help but ask:" Are you g-going to s-stay here f-for the rest of m-my investigation? B-because I would ap-preciate it if you c-could let me do m-my w-work in peace."

The doctor is clearly displeased about the obvious dismiss and for a split-second Barry is certain that he is going to grab one of the vials closest to him and throw it at him.

"I clearly have more important things to do than babysit a CSI rookie, so no, I am not going to stay."

The other man's tone is acidly enough that Barry is surprised that his face hasn't started to melt off yet.

"You will only move what is necessary and you will ask before you decide to play around with any of the chemicals in here. The equipment you see here has probably cost twice the money everything you have in your little lab at the CCPD, so treat it accordingly."

Dr Rathaway says the word "lab" with such contemptuousness that Barry wishes Martin was here, his senior would probably have quite a few selected words for this snobby little jackass.

"R-right," he agrees tersely and holds the ginger's glare for a moment before the other man harrumphs disapprovingly and turns around to leave. It is then that Barry remembers that he probably would need someone to assist him to get back to the ground floor again.

"W-wait, how do I get back later? D-don't I need a card or someth-thing for the elevator?"

The doctor halts just as the door has opened and gives him a little smirk that probably doesn't mean anything good.

"I will fetch you after I've finished my work, don't worry," he explains and Barry suddenly is certain that this probably wouldn't be anytime soon as he remembers the man has been still working close to midnight the day before. Before he can protest, the ginger tells him not to break anything with another warning glare and is already out of the room.

"Fucking p-perfect…"

Barry sighs and looks at his watch. Already close to quarter to seven. He should have brought coffee with himself, he decides morosely and walks back over to what is possibly another part of the crime scene from earlier today.

Should the prick not turn up after he has finished, he would simply ask one of the other scientists around here to give him a lift up. He certainly isn't going to spend any loner here than he has to.

Time flies by quickly after the ginger haired doctor has left, as it usually does when Barry immerses himself into one of his investigations and when he bothers to look at his watch again, he is a bit taken aback that it is already close to ten.

Barry goes over the bagged evidence he has collected one more time and looks through the pictures on his digital camera to make sure that he has caught everything important to the case, before he decides that the doctor had more than enough time to turn up again. He puts everything back into his equipment case and, with one last glance to the wall, he makes his way over to the door.

It is when he comes to a halt in front of it and looks at the dark display that he remembers that Dr Rathaway has actually used his ID to activate the opening mechanism. His stomach drops when he realizes what this means. How the hell could he have not picked up on this sooner? Well, not that it would have made much of a difference with how quickly the good doctor has been out of here…

"Oh you have t-to be f-f-fucking kidding me," he hisses under his breath starts to experimentally push on the dark touch screen.

Nothing happens.

Of course.

Barry groans loudly and lets his forehead drop against the cool hard surface of the door.

He would punch that arrogant pick, the consequences be damned. Who the hell would do something like this anyway? What if there was an emergency or if he needed to use the restroom? The heck was wrong with that guy!?

Checking his watch again, he huffs in frustration. He doesn't want to spend the next two hours here till that arse decides to turn up again. It has been a long day already and he is tired and not to mention thirsty. He really should have thought of grabbing a coke or something on his way here...

Checking his phone tells him what he has expected. There is no reception whatsoever.

Despite promising himself little of it, Barry tries to knock at the door and get the attention of anybody who may be close-by. He isn't surprised when nobody answers and after about five minutes of this he decides to take a seat next to the door.

Barry lets his head fall back against the wall and sighs quietly. It is a pity that he can't even call someone to just make the time go by quicker. He is pretty sure Lisa would find this hilarious… or maybe not. She would probably talk Mick into giving Rathaway a beating and Len would get pissed at him for getting himself into such a situation in the first place.

Still, being locked into a room causes unwelcome memories to rise up in his mind and he really wishes he could just hear some familiar voice right now.

He flips through his contacts and halts on Iris' number. Knowing her, she would probably insist on coming her herself right now and get all up into the doctors face for that stupid little prank. He has to smile at that notion because Iris may be one of the nicest people he knows but she could be damn intimidating when she really gets angry.

The smile slips off his lips when the notion of Joe learning about this comes to his mind. The older cop would certainly blow a gasket and drag him to Director Singh about this.

… and wouldn't that be fun?

It would probably be best not to mention this to anybody, Barry decides and lets his hand with his phone drop to his side.

Rathaway may be a prick but he doubts that the man would have locked him in here in case anything could happen to him. He could use the time just as well to catch a small nap, he is pretty sure it still would be a while before the redhead would come to pick him up.

The hissing noise of a mechanical door sliding open causes him to awake with a start and he instinctively scrambles to his legs and backs away from the noise. He blinks rapidly and tries to get his eyes to focus while his heart hammers nearly painfully against his chest.

For a horrible brief moment he has utterly no idea where he is and it is a nearly sickening experience. Then, his mind catches up with his body and he picks up on his surrounding and the man in front of him.

His stomach make an uncomfortable lurch and he makes another step back causing him to slightly collide with one of the shelves.

Dr Wells looks just as he has this morning, the same clothes and all. This time, though, he is watching him with a rather surprised and somewhat curious expression.

"Are you alright?"

There is a slight note of concern in his voice and Barry can only stare back at him for a long moment, too caught off-guard by his sudden and unexpected appearance.

"You are the young man who was with Detective West this morning," tries Dr Wells again:" I think I haven't caught your name, Mister…?"

"A-Allen," he utters and feels himself flush in embarrassment when he realizes how uneven his voice sounds. He coughs slightly and repeats more firmly.

"B-Barry Allen."

Something flickers in the other man's eyes, an expression that passes by too quickly for Barry to catch but his brief worry eases away again when the doctor nods and doesn't appear like he is going to set the security on him.

"You are an investigator?"

"Y-yes, they s-send m-me over th-this evening t-to inv-vestigate th-this r-room," he explains nervously and his face grows uncomfortably hot in embarrassment over how stupid he actually has to sound with his increasingly worsening stammer. He is pretty sure it would go up in flames any moment now.

"I see."

Dr Well is studying him now with a slight frown and Barry worries that he is actually getting in trouble for being caught in one of this man's labs on his own even though it has been Dr Rathaway who locked him in here.

"Who did bring you down here?"

"D-Dr R-R… R-Rathaw-way."

God, why couldn't the damn ground open up and swallow him whole? He is making a complete idiot out of himself…

Dr Wells appears annoyed for a second before he sighs softly and takes his glasses off to rub his eyes.

"I have to apologize for my colleague, he has a brilliant mind but his people skills are rather… lacking."

Barry nearly snorts rudely in response and thinks that this is the understatement of the year.

"When did he bring you down here?"

"A-around s-seven."

Which causes the questions of what time it is actually right now. It must already be close to midnight, he did sleep for at least an hour.

A soft curse escapes him when he checks his watch and it turns out that is already half past three in the morning.

Half past three in the freaking morning!

He has been locked in here for over eight hours!?

As if this thought caused to turn a switch, he sudden realizes the increasingly painful need to use the bathroom. Despite not having had anything to drink for nearly nine hours, his bladder still has made sure to do its job. Speaking of drinking, he realizes as well how dry his mouth actually feels.

"I-is th-there a b-bathr-room s-somew-where around here?"

"Of course," Dr Wells, who is eyeing him once again with slight concern, steps back out of the room and signs him to follow:" There is a restroom close-by you can use."

Barry picks his case up and tries to ignore how uncomfortable walking with such a full bladder is.

Five minutes later, after relieving himself and gulping down some of the water from the sink in the restroom, he feels better and calmer again and actually thinks that this situation is probably a bit amusing. He would bet his right hand that Rathaway has simply honestly forgotten about him.

"I am really very sorry for what has happened, Mr Allen," Dr Wells tells him very seriously as he lead him back to the elevator:" I will make sure that Dr Rathaway realizes that such a petty and childish behaviour has serious consequences."

Despite what the stupid prank the redhead has pulled on him, Barry doesn't like the notion that the guy could actually lose his job because of him. Not that he wouldn't deserve it at least a bit…

"I am s-sure he d-didn't m-mean to l-lock m-me in there th-this l-long."

The doctor gives him an odd look.

"I think the actual problem is that he locked someone in a laboratory with dangerous chemicals and equipment at all, Mr Allen."

Barry looks away and mutters his agreement, feeling stupid all over again.

The rest of their walk to the elevator goes by in an awkward silence and he mostly keeps his eyes on the ground. He can't help but feel disappointed, he really has always hoped that a meeting with Dr Wells would run differently than this.

Well, less embarrassing, at least.

"How old are you, if I may ask, Mr Allen?"

Barry, who has followed the doctor in the cab, turns to him in surprise just as the door in front of him close shut.

"T-twenty-th-three."

"That is quite young for a CSI," remarks Dr Wells and while Barry expects it, there is nothing like scepticism in the way he says it or watches him now. He seems more curious or anything.

"Y-yeah, th-they c-call m-me b-baby-face a-at th-the department," he agrees sourly and could kick himself as soon as he realizes what he has just said. How damn tired is he right now?

He shuts his mouth with a soft click and averts his eyes in embarrassment.

Dr Wells chuckles and Barry glances unhappily at him.

"N-not all of th-them," he tries to clarify but only ends up feeling even more like a dimwit for it.

It is an immense relief when the elevator comes to a stop and the familiar female voice announces their arrival at the ground floor. The security guard at the reception desk gets up, probably thinking that Barry is some kind of trouble, but Dr Wells waves him off and tells him that he is just a guest. The burly man frowns but takes the doctor's word for it and sits back down again.

"S-sorry f-for g-getting s-stuck in y-you l-lab," Barry apologizes and cringles inwardly because they both know that it hasn't been his fault. Why couldn't he just shut up and leave before he left an utterly ridiculous impression of himself.

"Sorry for one of my staff getting you stuck there," replies Dr Wells and meets Barry's wary gaze with a serious but not unkind expression.

It is an odd thing to notice but the other man is really tall, taller even than Barry, who himself has been known as Beanpole among his friends since he was fourteen. This isn't something new for him to pick up on, though, he knows that Dr Wells is tall, he has seen it on photos in newspapers and on the television but it is somehow different now that he is standing in front of him.

Whereas he is tall and skinny, the other man is in a much better physical shape, even with the well-tailored suit – or maybe because of it? – and Barry realizes too late how his gaze briefly moves over the other man body. It is just for a second but he knows that Dr Wells must have noticed and it tops about any embarrassing moment that has come before by far.

"S-sorry a-again, I-I sh-should g-go n-now," he stammers and quickly turns around to make his way to the entrance. His tempo is bordering on a jog but he really doesn't care. He is never ever going to return here, not for any damn case in the world!

… and the door is locked.

Of course it is, why wouldn't it be at nearly four at the morning?

"C-come on," he exasperatedly mutters under his breath, not sure whether it is to the damn door, his miserable luck or himself for behaving like a complete twerp. He tenses up when someone else – undoubtedly Dr Wells – comes up behind him.

"I think it would be easier for you to leave if I unlock the door first," remarks the other man drily but there is a slight amusement below it and Barry can't bring himself to look at him. He only steps aside to let him use his card on the scanner next to the glass door because everything in here seems to be operated by those damn slaps of plastic.

"Th-thanks," mumbles Barry when Dr Wells holds the door open for him and quickly exits the building.

Yes, he would never come back, definitely never. At least Iris and Lisa would be happy to no longer have to go to those tours with him…

"Mr Allen?"

Barry, who has stopped short about six feet from the entrance as he realizes that he still had to call a cab, reluctantly turns back.

"I assume you aren't here with your car?"

Dr Wells walks up to him in a slow pace and Barry has to fight the urge to step back because he has already proven that he is only spouting embarrassing nonsense as soon as he gets too close to him.

"N-no, I-I u-used a c-cab."

The other man hums and studies him for a brief moment, which makes it hard for Barry not to fidget.

"I am on my way home as well," explains Dr Wells:" Seeing that it is due to one of my staff members that you are still here at this time, I think offering you a ride home is the least I can do."

"N-no, th-that is r-really n-not n-n-necessary, I-I w-will j-just c-call a c-c-cab."

As if to proof it he pulls out his mobile phone from his jacket pocket and shows it to him.

"Y-you d-don't n-need t-to b-bother, D-Dr W-Wells."

"It would be no bother," assures him the other man and Barry doesn't miss the slight frown with which he is watching him now. He has to sound so ridiculous.

"At this time the streets are most likely empty anyway and I guess that you do live within the borders of Central?"

"N-no, K-Keys-stone," he explains, a bit relieved seeing that Dr Wells certainly wouldn't want to drive all the way over there.

"But you work for the CCPD?"

Dr Wells seems a bit surprised about this and Barry nods while nervously tapping his phone against this thigh.

"Y-yes, b-but I-I g-grew u-up i-in K-KC."

"I see."

The other man gives him a curious look but seems to decide against asking any more questions right now as he goes on.

"My offer still stands, Mr Allen. It would be no trouble for me and I really would feel better knowing that you don't have to wait for a cab and pay surcharge because of one of my colleague's questionable humour."

He sounds like he really means it and Barry thinks that it would be nice to take him up on this. A cab would be quick as well but it would mean 50% surcharge this early in the morning and this is probably the only time for such an offer to occur anyway.

"I-I d-don't w-want t-to c-cause you a-any hassle," he says again, just to make sure because he really means it. He hates to be a bother to other people.

"As I have said before, you aren't," replies Dr Wells earnestly.

Barry watches him for a moment before he hesitantly agrees.

He is surprised about the faint and pleased smile he gets in return. It causes something deep in his belly to flutter and he can't but return it tentatively.


	8. Watching You Sleep

There is something very calming about watching Barry sleep.

Eobard loves to watch the young man at any time during the day but there is something special to when he is resting, unconscious to the world around him and defenceless.

Over the years he has been in this new timeline he has spent many hours like this, watching. Always watching.

Sometimes he has the feeling that he is doing nothing but these days.

Watching and waiting.

And it is wearing on his patience.

The young man in front of him lays completely still. There is no other sound in the quite room than his deep and slow breaths.

With the usual tension gone from his face and body he looks at peace for once.

Eobard likes nights like this one the best, the calm ones, the few peppered in between.

He knows that it won't last.

Tomorrow it will be back to Barry thrashing around, breathing hard, moaning and pleading for mercy from people that are no longer there.

The young man is lucky tonight. So far there has been no nightmares causing him to startle up in the familiar panic, eyes wide with confused horror and his mouth open in a scream – sometimes silent, sometimes not, his neighbours have gotten used to that by now.

Eobard doesn't like those nights. He doesn't like to see him in this kind of agony – one he himself is quite familiar with, even if it is for different reasons.

Still, he also stays through that.

It causes something in his stomach to curl up nearly painfully tight at times, seeing him like that. Mostly guilt and regret but something much closer to anger as well. At times he feels it again, the old familiar hate for Barry Allen.

Even after all these time he hasn't completely let go of it and it would likely always stay a part of him, no matter how much he tries to ignore it and live a life as if it wasn't constantly present.

It is a paradox, a contradiction in itself, really. Eobard hates those.

He also doesn't like the nightmares, not just because he doesn't want the young man in front of him, who isn't that Barry Allen – not anymore –, have to live through them but because they are a near constant reminder of what he has forced him to do, again and again. Because the man, no matter what age, no matter what timeline, is stubborn to a fault.

It isn't that hard to watch these days anymore, though. Barry has become very good at handling the memories over the years. The older he has gotten, the more apt he has gotten with pushing the nastiness of his past away, bury it somewhere deep into his mind from where it couldn't reach him during the day.

Nights are still difficult but he is bearing it much better nowadays. Eobard is grateful for it, it is exhausting to watch when Barry isn't able to handle those haunting memories. It makes it hard to understand his own emotions at times. A mixture of sympathy, regret and anger fighting for dominance in his chest while he watches him cry and shake so much that he sometimes worries he would break apart.

Eobard makes his way over to Barry's bed, careful to stay silent as he isn't using his speed right now.

He thinks that it is odd how things change. Once, he would have given anything to see the great Barry Allen nearly smothered by the fear, anger and still present pain that are caused by to the ramifications of an ugly abusive past.

Maybe there still a small part of him that does…

Fortunately, tonight seems to be a good night. It is already past three in the morning and Barry would have woken up by now if he was supposed to have another difficult night.

The room is lit well enough by the street lamps down below the window of the small bedroom that Eobard is able to let his gaze slowly travel over the young man, quietly marvelling how much he has grown and how young he still is at the same time. And it is so hard not to touch.

His fingers itch and he has to briefly clench his fists to keep himself from doing so.

Meeting Barry in person two days ago has been… a change from his plan. It has been too early.

All because of that damn mingling idiots, who couldn't just let it rest, and because he has neglected to taken into account that Hartley does very well live up to his reputation of being a brat when it comes to anybody else than Harrison Wells. The young scientist may be very brilliant but he still is just that, young. He has obviously difficulties to keep the pettier traits of his character in check just now.

It is so damn difficult at times to not just move his hand through this annoying and primitive little insects. They are necessary, they all have their part to play but it is still so irritating to have to keep them around, to interact with them. Like they have any meaning at all…

Despite that, Eobard knows that nobody but himself is to blame for that. He shouldn't have left that day, he should have made sure that Barry leaves again and not get locked into one of the underground labs.

Well, what is done is done. In the end he seemed to have been luckier than he would have hoped for.

While he no longer needs to worry about time to run its initial course or something similar to it, it is still a good indication to watch that by now obsolete headline.

Eobard is well aware that he has become quite paranoid over the years but even with everything he has learned he is worried that one small step in the wrong direction could keep Barry from getting his powers. Experience has taught him that it never ends well when he forces them on him any other way after the news article has changed its initial headline.

There are certain markers he has to follow, they can be changed in a certain way but only so much before everything ends in tragedy for everybody else and a lot of frustration for him.

Even with that in mind, Eobard can't deny that he enjoyed their first official meeting in this timeline. He still remembers Barry's shy gaze and how he – obviously unintentionally – let his eyes travel over him for a split-second before he quickly averted them as soon as he realized what he had been doing. It caught Eobard a bit off-guard, he hadn't expected this kind of interest just yet.

It isn't really that usual, though, and nothing that needs him to adjust his plan. Barry always holds some kind of fascination for Harrison Wells, in about every alteration of the initial timeline.

This in itself is quite a funny and curious change seeing that the initial Barry Allen had never even met him there. In the reality with which everything started, Barry had been over thirty when he got his powers, he had been about to be married and a very good but also quite unreliable scientist due to being notoriously late to about anything. His parents had never died, neither of them, nor had his father been locked in prison. They had been a loving and caring couple and Barry had had a happy and normal life till the day he got struck by lightning.

It had been a surprisingly boring life. Eobard always thought so, even when he had still been just a student.

It was always the same, in any world he stumbled over during his journey...

After travelling back for the first time the notion of it had become amusing. He loved the feeling that came with the knowledge that he had the power to change this – after he had learned to hate the Flash, after the first time he had gotten stuck in this damn timeline, he had learned to enjoy the knowledge that he could take it away from him on a whim. That Barry would never even knew about what it was like to live a life where he was growing up with both of his parents, where not some kind of tragedy hit him and the people around him…

The young blond man in front of him huffs softly in his sleep and lifts his arm so that it ends up covering his eyes. He mumbles something unintelligible before a shudder overcomes him. Eobard watches him with a slightly concerned frown but it seems that Barry is settling down again after another small huff.

There is not another person alive left – there has probably never been to begin with – who knows about as much as about the original version of the Flash as Eobard does. He knows by now that his interest in the man turned obsessive towards the end of his academic career, so much so that he wanted to be him, wanted to have his powers, his life.

And more than anything else, he wanted his appreciation.

It had never happened, though.

Fate is a funny thing. It will always make sure you learn sooner than later that it will not give you what you want. At least not freely.

Eobard makes another step towards the bed and the sleeping man. Since he has talked to him two days ago, Barry is constantly on his mind, even more persisting than usual, and it has become a rather tiresome thing. His staff started to notice that he isn't completely there with his thought and Caitlin even asked him about it before leaving this evening. She has been honestly concerned and despite knowing what will inevitably happen to her towards the end, he couldn't but feel a very slight but familiar fondness for the reserved young woman.

In moments like that he realizes how bothersome all of this is. This charade, dealing with other people who he has seen dying so many times already that he has stopped counting a while ago. Dealing with investors, with politicians, with other scientists and people from this backwater time in general.

The worst thing, though, is being someone else, being Harrison Wells.

A disdainful sneer crosses his face.

God, he hates that name. If there was anything he could do without during all of this, then it would be this damn identity theft. It is becoming more and more difficult for him to keep a grip of who he really is and he knows from experience what a slippery slope that can be.

After all those years it is sometimes hard to think of himself as Eobard Thawne from the far future. Sometimes, even in his own mind, he becomes Harrison Wells. It always leaves him furious when he realizes that.

He can't get negligent.

One can wear a mask only so long before it gets stuck and this would ruin everything, it has already once…

Eobard pushes this string of thoughts away. He really doesn't want to think about it right now. Not while he is here in one of those rare nights where he can watch Barry sleep like this, quiet and calm.

His mind goes back to the early morning hours two days ago again and his mood lightens a bit. The drive from the laboratories to Keystone has been awkward at first, at least for the young man. Eobard found it mostly amusing and interesting, especially because Barry kept giving him brief glances with an expression that made it clear that he couldn't believe that he was getting a lift by him. He took pity on the young man rather quickly, though, and he involved him in some small-talk. It helped Barry to relax a bit, even though his stammer stayed pretty bad, which is always a clear indication that he is very nervous.

His interest in him stayed painfully obvious during the whole time. It may be mostly due to Barry's mesmerisation with who he is, who he pretends to be, but he knows that this isn't all of it.

There has always been a very odd kind of connected between the Flash and the Reverse Flash. At first, Eobard didn't pay it too much mind, he thought it was only the sheer hate that chained them both together. His desire to kill that man who has turned out to be nothing but a failure, nothing like the man he has imagined.

Nothing but a disappointment.

Eobard crouches down next to the bed and studies Barry's relaxed face. He is close enough that he could touch it so easily.

Barry's mouth is slightly open, framed by full lips he wants to taste so badly that it actually hurts. It has been so long since he kissed him, another lifetime in all actuality.

The arm is still covering his eyes but Eobard knows all of the younger man's face by heart, he doesn't need to see it to know exactly what it looks like right now.

His lips quirk into a slight smile as his gaze travels up to the shock of blond hair.

It is always a small source of amusement for him. He has never learned why Barry's hair colour tends to change while the rest of his appearances stays the same after each reset of the timeline. It is always just his hair. He has seen him at times with hair that were a light ash blond and other times with ones that got as dark as a light chocolate brown.

It is curious in its utter randomness. So far, Eobard hasn't that spotted anybody else with such a re-occurring change in appearance. People usually stayed the same, other than for changes that happened during their life but nothing they start out with differently.

He has been suspicious of it at first, worried that it could mean something essential, but in time he has realizes that it seems to be just another oddity on the long list of what makes up Barry Allen. These days, he just finds it funny.

Still, if he is honest with himself, then he has to admit that he is quite happy that it has been blond again this time around. The version of Barry Allen he has first gotten to know – the initial version of him – had been blond as well, after all.

Eobard slowly reaches out and takes a flick of his short hair between his thumb and index finger, feeling the softness of it.

The world doesn't really change when he switches into speed mode, at least not when he is someplace nothing or nobody is moving. The only difference is the sudden lack of noise.

Barry's hair smells clean and of the vanilla shampoo he used this evening. It is soft when Eobard presses his lips onto it. He cups the young man's right cheek, the need to touch him nearly too much to bear even as he allows himself this little break of his rules.

Eobard wants him so badly, he needs him so badly. He hates that it still needs time, that he can't just take him here and now. He inhales Barry's smell deeply and feels the erection in his pants become nearly painfully hard.

Then, he is standing next to the bad again, his chest heaving as he tries to get a damn hold on himself.

His hand trembles slightly as he runs his fingers through his hairs and takes another deep and slow breath to calm his agitated body.

"Damn…"

Eobard rubs his face and leaves the speed force, he still moves too fast for any human being able to see him but he is once again connected to the normal pace of time. His little stunt should have happened too quickly for Barry being able to pick up on it. He isn't surprised when he sees that the younger man is starting to stir though.

Barry rolls onto his side and groggily pushes himself up onto his elbows while he is obviously trying to get himself to wake up all the way by shaking his head. His eyes show confusion and fear and Eobard feels the sudden urge to smack him for this before it is quickly replaced by the one to do so with himself.

He doesn't want it to be like this again. He has sworn to himself it wouldn't…

Eobard averts his eyes and takes another deep breath.

This is not going to be another one of those damn failures. All the trials and errors are going to pay off, he has put too much time – all that damn years and years – and effort into it.

He is not going to let it all go to waste, especially not because he can't keep his damn libido in check. There has been too much to pay already, all the mistakes, all the wrong decisions. He has learned, he has adapted and he has evolved accordingly.

This time, he will get Barry Allen as a whole, his body and his affection, all of him.

He is not going to let this become another failed attempt.

Barry gets up from the bed and Eobard follows him out the bedroom.

They end up in the bathroom, where you young man proceeds splashing some cold water onto his face. He looks tired and shaken, like he usually does after a nightmare. His eyes study himself for a moment before they move over to the right, where Eobard would have been visible in the mirror should he haven't moved too quickly for it.

This is nothing unusual and he knows that Barry can't see him. The young man probably has no idea why he is currently watching this spot with an apprehensive look. He doesn't understand that the reason why he feels so uneasy right now is because he unconsciously knows that someone else is here.

After another long moment, Barry averts his eyes again and splashes some more water onto his face. He shudders and gulps a few handful of it down.

"I am f-fine," he mutters to himself and reaches for the towel next to the sink to dry his face.

Eobard watches the dark circles under his eyes and feels a slight guilt for being the cause that Barry is up after just a couple hours of sleep again.

He decides that it is time for him to leave.

"I w-won't be able to f-fall back to sleep," Barry murmurs to himself, a habit of his when he is alone and exhausted and/or upset:" I don't want to r-read… I c-could eat something…"

He glances once more into the mirror where…

With a small sigh he turns around so that he can lean against the sink and lays his head in the neck.

"Damn it…"

Again just about four hours, it is the sixth night in a row and he is really starting to feel the lack of sleep.

Why couldn't he rest for a whole seven hours, just this once?

And this time it hasn't even been a nightmare waking him up but…

Barry groans lowly and rubs both of his hand forcefully over his face. The uneasy feeling that has accompanied since waking up has started to ease away and he is pretty sure that it probably has been a nightmare that is costing him some where necessary hours of rest again, even if he isn't able to remember it.

"No sleep for m-me," he mutters tiredly but considers going back to bed nonetheless for a moment before he dismisses it. He knows that he wouldn't be able to fall back asleep and he would probably just end up with a stiff neck.

Instead of going back to bed, Barry ends up in the kitchen. He sits down on the kitchen table and cuts a small pear in wedged after which he proceeds to munch listlessly on one part while starting absentmindedly into space in front of him for about five minutes.

"Th-this sucks."

He leans back against the backrest of the chair and rubs his eyes, annoyed at himself for waking up and at the world at large just because he feels like it right now.

Seeing that watching his kitchen wall is not a very appealing way to spent time, he reaches for his phone that he has grabbed from his bedside table before heading here. He opens his messenger app and hesitates a moment before selecting one of the names from his favourites.

"_Hey, are you asleep? Can I call you?"_

Again, Barry hesitates before he finally sends the short text. Afterwards he gets up to grab himself a glass of water. The piece of pear has left a much too sweet taste in his mouth.

He is just about to open the water tap when the small beeping notification-sound of his phone cuts through the otherwise quite kitchen. He smiles and checks the reply he has gotten.

"_Yes. No."_

Barry rolls his eyes and leans back against the edge of his kitchen counter.

As expected, another beeping follows soon after the first one.

"_Are you in trouble again,_

_you annoying brat?"_

Barry snorts softly and grins.

"_No, just can't sleep. :o/_

_Does this make you 'sleep-texting',_

_seeing that you are asleep? :D"_

While he waits for a reply, Barry swiftly fills his glass and makes his way over to the living room so that he can sit on his much more comfortable couch.

"_It is goddamn four in the morning,_

_nobody is supposed to have to_

_bear your lame jokes this early."_

Barry chuckles and wraps himself in the comforter that he usually keep folded at one the left armrest. He is a bit cold due to how early it is and how tired he is.

"_Lisa thinks I am funny. ^-^"_

"_No, she really doesn't."_

"_So mean! TT-TT"_

"… _you do realize that you are _

_worse than her with that stupid_

_text-faces, don't you?"_

"_XD XD XD = :-*"_

After about five minute without response, Barry sends another one.

"_Was the kiss too much? Are_

_you angry? Don't be angry, you are_

_the only other person I have right now."_

Another two minutes go by, then.

"_You are so full of shit, kid."_

Barry grins amused.

"_Can I call you?"_

"_Stop asking stupid questions."_

Smiling to himself, Barry lays down so that his head is resting on the armrest of the couch as he selects the call-symbol.

The call is answered just after the first ring.

"You could try hot milk instead of pestering others," Len says in lieu of a greeting. He sounds relaxed and calm, which in turn helps Barry to loose some of his own tension.

"Hot m-milk could n-never keep up with you."

"I am flattered," replies his friend drily and Barry can make out the faint sound of what has to be the television in the background.

"How w-was the night out? You don't sound like you've gotten too much to drink," remarks Barry as he rolls onto his side, into a more comfortable position.

"Got a small buzz but I've called it a night rather early."

"Are you not feeling alright? You've caught a bug or something?" he can't help but sound a bit worried. Len chuckles in return.

"Nah, just too much Dillon."

Barry frowns.

"You s-started a fight with him?"

"I didn't," Len sounds amused by his audible disapproval:" But it did end in a brawl and Charlie kicked us out."

"If you g-go on like this, he is going to end up b-banning you lot from the bar."

Charlie would probably take a baseball bat to their heads at first, as far as he knows the man, and the notion is worrying. Even Mick has quite a healthy respect for the bar owner and that usually is an indication that you better should not mess with that guy.

"He won't, we leave too much money at that crummy place for that," dismisses Len with an audible smirk in his voice.

"He will too, he has already an eye on you lot after wh-what you did with t-the billiard table l-last April," points Barry out and can't but frowns worriedly when he remembers how furious Charlie had gotten back then:" He l-looked like he was going to b-blow a gasket."

"Charles always looks like that. He was probably born with a damn scowl."

Barry has to crack a grin at that.

"You wouldn't know anyth-thing about that kind of thing, w-would you?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" asks Len but sounds very much amused. He really seems to be in a good mood.

"You l-look pensive and frowny like all the t-time, Len," he points out.

"Everybody would look permanently pissed if they had to deal with the people I have to on a daily basis."

"Excluding me."

"No, not excluding you, you overgrown brat."

Barry's smile grows wider and he chuckles. He pulls the cover a bit closer around himself and is glad to realize that the familiar anxiety is gone that has accompanied him since after waking up.

"We've another poker night next Saturday," goes Len on when Barry fails to retort something:" Around six at Sam's place."

It is obviously an invitation. It has been a while since Barry joined them for a game and the notion is alluring but, at the same time, he can feel a familiar uneasy stirring up in his belly.

"W-will M-Mark be th-there?" he asks hesitantly.

"Mardon can go fuck himself if he has a problem," grunts Len, suddenly angry:" If his dipshit of a brother is too stupid to rob a liquor store without leaving enough evidence behind for you to pin it on him, he deserves a cell in the Heights."

Len has never liked Clyde. He thinks that the younger Mardon brother is a liability due to how hot-headed he tends to act and his seemingly inability to listen to orders – and Len is all about orders. The only reason he usually lets him stick around is Mark, because he is a good addition to their little group and gets along well enough with the rest.

"It is his b-brother," Barry points out, not sure why he even bothers because he can't really stand Clyde and is rather glad that he is out of the picture, at least for now.

"Who is a rash idiot," replies Len indifferently and calm once more.

There isn't really much to argue about and it is a bit of relief to hear once again that the other man isn't angry at him because of this ugly business. Working for the CCPD sucks if most of your friends are actual criminals.

"I d-don't w-want to cause t-trouble l-like last t-time."

"There will be no trouble."

Barry wishes he could be so certain about it like his friend seems to be.

"Okay, I w-will pass by for a game or t-two in c-case I am not needed in the lab."

"You are going to let this twerp of a captain work you in the ground," Len sounds annoyed again, like he usually does when it comes to the amount of time Barry spends at work. Lisa and her brother are pretty much on the same page when it comes to that and he suddenly hopes that this topic won't come up next Saturday because he really doesn't need them ganging up on him again.

"Captain S-Singh isn't a twerp," he replies sourly. The man may not like him all that much but he is a good and competent captain.

"He behaves like one."

"He doesn't," huffs Barry before he yawns. He rubs his eyes and changes the phone to his other ear so that he can rest his head more comfortably.

"There is j-just too much to do," he goes on and decides to rest his eyes for a moment:" It isn't his fault th-that Central is b-busy when it comes to c-crimes."

"You aren't the only forensic scientist he has and you still reach about 60 hours a week."

"S-so do the others."

"Maybe he should hire more, in that case."

This causes Barry to laugh.

"Are you s-saying you would like f-for him to h-hire more c-cops?"

"Why not? We would just have to up our game."

"And you call me f-full of shit," huffs Barry and it annoys him a bit that he can't say whether his friend is serious about this or not. He knows Len can take care of himself and the others but he doesn't like the notion of him growing reckless.

"Don't worry your head off. We both know that the city is much too cheap to give the CCDP the money to afford more people when it comes to their scientific staff."

It consoles him a bit to know that Len probably has a point there.

"You sound like you are going to drop off any moment now," his suddenly says and Barry realizes that his eyes are still closed and that he really doesn't want to put the effort into opening them again anytime soon.

"I am tired," he agrees and as if on a cue he has to yawn again, louder and longer than before. I causes Len to snort.

"Go to bed, Barry."

"I am on th-the couch."

"Then stay on the couch and stop bothering me already."

There is nothing harsh to how he says it, he isn't completely joking though.

"Thanks for the t-talk, Len."

"No problem, kiddo."

Barry is gone mere seconds after ending the call.


	9. Dinner for Two

"Why haven't you cut them any smaller?"

Iris frowns down at her salad with a slightly disgusted expression while she proceeds to carefully pick the pieces of raw onion from the green.

"You always do that," she huffs and gives him an annoyed look.

"They are s-small," Barry protests:" If I had cut them any smaller we could just as w-well have taken onion powder."

"Or we could just have left them out to begin with."

"You can't have t-tuna salad w-without onions."

She snorts and mutters something about "health-junky" under her breath which causes Barry to give her a slightly insulted glare.

It is a nice calm evening in the West household. Music is playing quietly in the background and mingles with the sound of rain outside as they sit on the kitchen counter after just finishing preparing dinner.

"Onions are g-good for you," he mutters but his frown quickly vanishes when Iris shoots him an amused look.

"There are a lot of things that are good for you that taste much better than chopped onions."

"Says you."

Iris rolls her eyes but smiles as she proceeds on her fastidious task.

"So," she says after a moment of comfortable silence has passed between them:" Dad mentioned that people from S.T.A.R. labs were at the department again today. They've brought some interesting new gadgets, I have heard."

Barry shrugs and tries not to grimace. He knows where Iris is going with that and he has really hoped that she would led this topic rest.

"It is awfully nice of them, isn't it?" she proceeds and he can feel her gaze on himself even though he is keeping his eyes strictly on his salad.

"Yeah," he agrees half-heartedly.

"I mean, they have been equipping the department with new things for a while now."

"They w-want to h-help the CCPD," Barry keeps shuffling the piece of tuna around on his plate and feels how his appetite slowly but surely ceases away:" They have been quite g-grateful for how discreet the p-police handled the whole situation w-with the murder."

"Right…"

The music stops in the background and a DJ starts to speak about how the Top 100 charts seem to have somehow gotten stuck with how little things have changed over the last couple of weeks. Barry thinks about changing the channel as he picks up a cherry tomato with his fork. He would rather listen to some music than have this conversation…

"Dad told me that Dr Wells was there this time as well," proceeds his friend:" He visited you in your lab, didn't he?"

Barry doesn't understand how she is not getting that he really doesn't want to touch upon this topic.

At all.

"Iris, let's not talk about this, okay?"

Barry gives her a pleading look, which causes the young woman to frown.

"Why? I think it's sweet."

A soft annoyed groan escapes him.

"He w-was just passing by and s-saying hello."

"I know that," laughs Iris and punches his arm lightly:" I am not saying anything else. It is all your dirty little mind if you think I was insinuating anything."

He shoots her a half-hearted glare but can't help but smile a bit as well.

"Seriously, though, I think it is nice of him," Iris goes on as she folds up the napkin that is filled with the picked raw onion pieces and leans over to let it drop into the wastebin next to the counter:" He really seems to like you."

"It isn't l-like that," protests Barry:" He was in the lab to t-talk to Martin and I was just standing near-by. He just came over to exchange a few words after that, that's all."

"If you say so," Iris has this amused and fond little glint in her eyes that tells him she doesn't believe him at all.

They fall quiet again after that, for which Barry is quite glad. He knows that Iris is just poking a bit fun at him but the whole situation with Dr Wells is a bit more complicated than she understands.

Rodriguez, another forensic scientist of the department and a complete and utter jerk, has quickly picked up that the good doctor seems to like him and Barry's initial flustered and nervous reaction whenever he was close to him caused his colleague to come to the conclusion that the older man is something like his sugar-daddy after the S.T.A.R. labs have started to outfit the force with new gadgets. This rumour quickly spread and while the CCPD probably is one of the most comfortable place you can work as a homosexual person – a big part of this is due to the captain – there are still some who used this as an opportunity to make his time there a bit harder.

Barry has tried to simply ignore it so far and if he could help it, he wouldn't change anything with his way of handling it. The last thing he wants to do is to turn this into something bigger than it has to be. He really doesn't need this kind of attention.

Still, he knows that there is probably not a single cop around who hasn't already heard of this rumour and it is embarrassing to say the least.

"Hey, what is with that long face, Bear?"

Iris is watching him with a concerned expression and he forces himself to give her a reassuring smile.

"I am f-fine, just a bit tired. It has b-been a long week."

She hums in understanding.

"Dad told me that you had a pretty ugly case yesterday to look at," she says slowly and studies him closely as if trying to gauge his reaction to her bringing this up:" You want to talk about it?"

Barry shrugs and picks his coke up to take a sip before glances at her.

"It's w-work. I don't like this part of the job but what can you do?"

Barry hates such cases, he absolutely loathes them. A small girl, abused to death, and isn't that something to remember? Just thinking about it causes a nearly sickening anger well up in his chest and he has to push the memory of it away.

He hates those people, he hates them so much. Why do they always have to do such horrible things to others? To the ones they are supposed to protect and care about?

Another silence falls between them, this time less comfortable and Barry knows that Iris isn't sure what to say next.

"Dr W-Wells…" Barry stops and coughs lightly before he goes on:" He wanted t-to g-grab l-lunch w-with me today."

Iris immediately sits up straighter at that and the worried expression lifts of her face and is replaces by a clearly curious and expectant one.

"Like a lunch-date?"

The glare he gives her at that is enough for her to lift her hands in a placating manner.

"Sorry, don't mind me."

"I… look, I d-don't…"

Barry is pretty certain at this point of his life that he initially was meant to be born as a tomato seeing how he proceeds to turn its shade about 90% of the time. He groans softly and rubs his face in frustration.

"I d-don't think so b-but… maybe?"

It is so damn frustrating. Since he has met Dr Wells for the first time about seven months ago they have seen quite a lot of each other and while he tried to write it up to coincident at first, he knows by now that it has been mostly due to the other man.

… which is pretty damn hard to believe and Barry still thinks that he is just imagining things more often than not.

"What did he say?" asks Iris curiously:" I mean, what was his exact wording?"

Barry grimaces unhappily and shrugs.

"J-just whether I w-would want to get l-lunch with him."

"Did he suggest a place?"

"How does that matter?"

Iris huffs and rolls her eyes.

"Well, if he has a place in mind it could tell you a lot about whether it is intended to be just a "friendly" lunch date or a lunch date he would hope to end in some "hanky-panky"."

She wiggles her eyebrows at him as she says so and bursts out laughing at his horrified and very much scandalized expression.

"Iris," he groans unhappily and is so damn glad that Joe is not here because the man would have more than his two cents to say to that.

"So, you've said he "wanted" to invite you? I guess that means there was no lunch date?"

"I had w-work to do," he says and even to his own ears he sounds very defensive as he does so:" And R-Rodriguez w-was right there."

There is no way in hell that he would put himself even more out there for that jackass.

"That scumbag?"

Iris' expression darkens for a moment before it becomes more sympathetic.

"You really should talk to Captain Singh about it, Bear," she tells him seriously:" He has no right to treat you like that just because he is envious that someone ten year his junior is much better at doing his job."

Barry bites his lower lip and averts his gaze from her so that he is looking down at his still hardly touched tuna salad.

"I d-don't want to make a b-big deal out of it," he mutters and like usual when he tells her so, Iris huffs in frustration. She doesn't think much of the way how he has handled this so far and he can't hold it against her because he isn't really all that happy with it either.

"It is already a big deal when that bastard makes you feel miserable enough that you are afraid to be who you are."

Who he is… that is an odd thing to say. More often than not, Barry has no idea who he is himself. Especially when it comes to anything sexually orientated. It makes him just plain uneasy to think about it and he prefers not to.

"I w-will think about it," he tells her and she gives him one of those sad looks that tells him that she knows just as well as he does that he will probably still not act on it.

Iris has come to know him very well over the last couple of years and he feels bad for disappointing her.

"He… do you r-really think he could… l-like me?" he asks hesitantly after studying his plate for a long moment and glances to his friend:" I m-mean, l am not… I d-don't understand why he would be inter-rested in me and he had a girlf-friend before…"

Not to mention that the notion alone that anybody could find Barry interesting in such a way terrifies him quite a bit.

"Oh, Bear," sighs Iris and studies him with an expression that is both, sad and fond:" You are such a sweet guy, why would he not be interested in you? Just because he has loved a woman before doesn't make this impossible."

"B-but I am-"

Barry breaks off because he knows that none of the words that come to his mind at that would go over too well with his friend. Ugly, broken, dirty, used… Nobody wants to hear it and he is never sure whether they really can't see it or whether they just don't want to. He just needs to glance into a mirror to know what he is…

"You are an amazing person," insists Iris firmly and reaches for his hand that is resting on the counter next to his plate to give it a slight squeeze:" And you're lovable and kind and while I don't know about Dr Well's, I can say for sure that I am really glad that you are in my life, okay?"

The words are touching something raw and hurting inside him that he hardly even notices anymore these days and it is so hard to keep the itching in his eyes at bay right now. It still catches him off-guard when Iris is like this, so openly nice and reassuring in a way that is painful and wonderful at the same time.

"Th-thank you," he utters quietly and really means it.

Iris squeezes his hand again and meets his wet eyes with a soft and warm smile.

The sound of the front entrance door being unlocked causes Barry to jumps slightly and they both turn towards its direction.

"Hey, I am home," calls Joe and Barry swiftly wipes his eyes with the end of his sleeve and really hopes that he doesn't look as close to tears as he feels. He grabs a napkin and blows his nose just before the other man enters the kitchen.

"Hi, Dad," greets Iris and gets up to give her father a hug.

Barry gets up as well and awkwardly waves at Joe when the other man turns his gaze upon him and lifts his eyebrows in surprise.

"Hey, Barry, I didn't know that you were going to pass by tonight."

"Yeah, it w-was kind of spontan-neous," he smiles uncertainly:" I hope that's ok-kay?"

"Of course," Joe studies him with a frown:" You know you are always welcome."

For an uncomfortable second Barry is certain that the other man would ask him if everything is alright.

"We made tuna salad," says Iris:" You wanna join us? I have to warn you though, Barry chopped the damn onion in pieces as big as dices."

"I didn't," he huffs:" You just too p-picky."

"I think he has you there," remarks Joe with a smirk that grows bigger when his daughter gives him the evil eye in return.

Later, after the salad is gone and dinner is finished, they move to the living room to watch some thriller that is currently playing and Iris has been curious about. Joe joins them and Barry ends up nodding off next to Iris on the couch.


	10. An Unexpected Visit

It is already past ten when Barry checks the clock above the entrance to his lab again. He keeps staring at it with an annoyed and accusing frown as if it was the clock's fault that he's already this late, and as soon as he realizes what he is doing he decides that he needs a break.

Tiredly, he gets up onto his feet and stretches, relieving some of the tension in his back and neck. Spending hours on the ground is probably not the best thing you can do for yourself, even if you haven't reached the twenty-five year mark yet.

Still, Barry likes to sit on the ground while going through files; it offers more space and he can arrange the papers around him in his own way of categorisation. Martin finds it funny and doesn't mind as long as he isn't bothering the others. Melton writes it up as one of his many odd quirks, but neither he nor Baxter have a problem with it, so Barry usually ends up like this whenever Rodriguez and Carton aren't around.

He rolls his head, trying to relief the pressure in his shoulders and neck a bit more as he studies the multitude of papers arranged around him on the floor.

The Finn's case is from the early nineties and has been put to rest for over two decades. With new evidence coming up and a change in one of the witnesses' statements, it had been reopened about a month ago and handed over to Barry.

He rubs his eyes as he steps out of the ring pf papers and notes, careful not move anything out of its place.

Baxter had left around half past eight, which makes him the only one in the lab right now. There are still enough people around as the PD never really settles down at any given hour of the day. He can see cops pass by about every other minute through the glass window of the slightly ajar entrance door, and he thinks about making a quick trip downstairs to see whether Joe is up for a small coffee break.

Taking a sip of his by-now stale coke resting on the counter next to him, he decides that he will do just that.

At least, that is what he intends to do before a soft knock causes him to look over at the door again.

He freezes and his eyes widen and for a second. He's certain that all the long nights and little sleep from last week are finally taking their toll on him and that he is seeing things now.

"Mr Allen," greets Dr Wells with a nod after Barry has failed to say anything or even move. There is a slight amused glint in his eyes as he pushes the door further open and enters the lab. "I hope I am not disturbing anything important?"

Barry gives himself a shake. "N-no, y-you… n-not at all, I… I w-was…"

His face turns a familiar shade of crimson and so Barry halts for a moment to take a quick calming breath. He coughs lightly, nervously glancing down at the papers of the Finn's case before he looks back to the doctor and goes on once more.

"No, I was just ab-bout to t-take a break anyway."

Why couldn't he talk like this from the beginning? Why does he always have to make a complete idiot out of himself?

"Good, I don't want to bother you while you're busy." Wells watches him with this amused little smile of his that he always seems to get whenever Barry demonstrates how amazing he is at putting his own foot in his mouth. There is nothing taunting about it, though.

The doctor lets his gaze briefly move to the ground next to him and quirks an eyebrow at the papers scattered there.

"It helps m-me th-think," Barry explains, even though Wells hasn't said anything. He knows that it has to look rather weird.

Wells only hums in response, eyeing the papers for a moment longer before turning back to him with a slight smile that quickly becomes a frown when he notices his unease.

"I don't think this is such an unconventional thing to do, Mr Allen," he tells him earnestly. "Different people have different ways of approaching problems, and the only important thing is that they solve them in the end."

It is an oddly reassuring thing to be told. Barry knows that, of course, but he also knows that many of his colleagues think that he is a rather strange fellow for it.

… Well, this and his obsession with spreading post-it-notes all over his workspace.

"I have to say, I am a little surprised to meet you here at this time," Wells goes on after a moment when Barry says nothing in response:" I guess that you are the only one still here in the lab?"

"Yes, th-the others have alr-ready left. Did you need something from Martin?"

"No, I just had a brief talk with your captain and was on my way out when I noticed that the lights were still on up here," explains the other man, shrugging slightly. "I was just curious."

"Oh," Barry nods, not really sure what else to say. He is all too aware of the fact that this is the first time since he's met Dr Wells over half a year ago that they are in a room alone together and it leaves him nervous and unsure what to say. He awkwardly changes his weight from one foot to the other.

"You've said that you are intending to take a break?" Wells meets his slightly wary, slightly hopeful look with a small but very much amused smile. Barry knows that there is no way in hell that the man hasn't picked up on his stupid little crush by now – Was it even really a crush or did he just fancy him? Was there even a difference? Damn, he is behaving like a teenager all over again!

"Y-yes," he affirms. "I w-was just about to see what Joe is doing and w-whether he wants to take one as well. He's having a late shift tonight and he usually gets lost in his work, so it's up to me or Ch-Chyre to make sure he isn't overd-doing it. Iris always …"

_Yes, go on babbling, just make it even more obvious how nervous you are, because this situation isn't awkward enough just yet_, thinks Barry, frustrated, as he forces himself to stop. His face heats up in the very familiar sensation of a blush and he averts his eyes.

A brief but very uncomfortable silence follows and he can feel Dr Wells' eyes on him, which gives him goosebumps.

"I'm starting to understand why Detective West is so fond of you, Mr Allen."

Barry turns back to the other man in surprise. Wells meets his gaze evenly.

"Uh…," he licks his lips and laughs, a bit embarrassed. "H-he is a g-good man, one of th-the best I know."

Something crosses Wells' expression; it is gone too quickly for Barry to be able to pick up on it, though.

"I am not surprised," Wells replies with a smile that seems somewhat off, "and I don't want to keep you from taking your break…"

He suddenly sounds a bit more aloof than just a second ago and Barry gets the absurd notion that the other man could be… envious? Of Joe?

No way…

"You aren't," Barry swallows and tries to ignore the sudden embarrassment that he feels as he goes on. "And y-you are also a g-good man. A g-great m-man, actually."

This causes Wells to lift an eyebrow again and study him curiously for a moment. Barry is suddenly hit by the realization that he could have completely misinterpreted the other man's reaction and that he's made an utter fool of himself. _Again_.

Then, a slow smile takes over Wells' lips and it seems both honest once more and quite pleased.

"Why, thank you, Mr Allen," he jests in good humour, which causes Barry to blush and duck his head in embarrassment.

"J-just saying how it i-is."

"I appreciate your kind words, but I am certain that most people would choose quite a different vocabulary to describe me."

Barry looks back at him with a frown. "You d-do a lot of g-good for the c-city. If people can't ap-preciate it, then that's their p-problem."

"Aren't you just a treat for an old man's ego?" chuckles Wells. Barry feels the urge to point out that he isn't an old man yet but stays quiet because, at least in comparison to himself, it is a rather fitting description. Wells is a bit more than double his age and… well, it _is_ quite an age gap.

That thought is a bit disconcerting.

"I know that you are quite busy with your work," Wells goes on after a brief pause, "but I was wondering whether you would be interested in passing by at S.T.A.R. Labs next Sunday. We are holding a science conference about alternative energy sources there and it offers quite some insight into future technology."

This comes quite unexpectedly. Barry just stares at the other man for a long moment, taken aback by the invitation to what has to be equal to a high-society event when it comes to the science world. He has heard of it of course—or, to be more accurate, read about it in some science journal a while ago. And while it has aroused his curiosity, he has never really wasted any time on even playing with the notion of attending it. The only people who would be there would be the ones who were able to make big names for themselves. Either that, or they would have the necessary money to promise potential funding. Clearly not someone like himself.

At least, he has thought so, so far.

"B-but isn't that l-like a c-closed event? I m-mean, I've r-read th-that n-not even the m-media is al-lowed inside the p-presentation hall."

The military would also be there and, as usual, whenever they came out play, everything would be all hush-hush. Some speculated that CC's S.T.A.R. Labs had been chosen for this event because they were onto the next big thing when it came to alternative and clean energy, and that they were actually already working on something in this direction.

"That is correct," agrees Wells and there is a tightness to his expression as he does so that makes it rather obvious that he isn't really a big fan of the hype surrounding his laboratory, "but you would be my guest, and seeing that I am the host of this event, that shouldn't be a problem." An amused glint returns to his eyes as he studies Barry with a fake frown. "At least as long as you promise me that you won't sell any of what you will learn in there to the highest bidding journalists afterwards, Mr Allen."

Barry laughs, feeling nervous, incredulous, and delighted all at the same time. He can't believe that this is really happening to him.

"N-no, of course not, Dr Wells."

"Good."

Again, Wells appears oddly pleased, and Barry wonders whether he has had this in mind for a while now or whether this invitation had been a rather spontaneous thing. It doesn't really matter. He is going to attend one of the biggest events the scientific society has to offer this year and the notion itself is still nearly blowing his mind.

"Th-thank you-"

Barry breaks off when he notices another person turning up behind Wells through the window on his still slightly ajar door. Joe enters just a second later, a slight frown in place as his gaze falls upon Dr Wells. Barry feels his stomach drop.

"H-hey, J-Joe," he greets and hopes the man would stop giving his '_I know there is something fishy about you_' look to the scientist. For whatever reason, his older friend didn't seem to like Wells all that much. Especially whenever he was around Barry.

"Barry," Joe turns to him with an expression that is both concerned and slightly reproachful, and while Barry knows that he has done nothing wrong, he can't help but feel a familiar sense of guilt well up inside his chest, "I was just passing by to see whether you would like to take a small break but I see you have already company."

"That's alright," interjects Wells before Barry can try to explain the situation. "I have to leave now, anyway, and I think Mr Allen was just about to go and look for you for the exact same reason, Detective West."

He turns back to Barry and gives him a small but warm smile. "I will make sure that you get an invitation within the next couple of days."

"Ok-kay." Barry knows that he probably looks like a small kid whom had just been promised chocolate, but he can't help it.

"Have a nice evening, Mr Allen." Wells looks over to Joe and nods. "Mr West."

Barry utters a goodbye and watches the other man leave as a warm, but not uncomfortably so, feeling settles into his belly.

So, this really just happened…

He notices that Joe is watching him and suddenly realizes that he is grinning, probably like an idiot.

"Uh, so, you w-wanna g-grab some coffee?"

Joe snorts and, to Barry's surprise, gives him a fond look.

"I know that you like him, Barry, and you are probably the last person who needs me to butt into your private life, but be careful, okay?" the older cop tells him, and while he is keeping his tone light the seriousness behind his words is hard to miss. "I have a bad feeling about this man."

"He is a g-good man, Joe," argues Barry, but only half-heartedly, because while his friend's worry may be unfounded – and a bit annoying – he knows that Joe is only trying to look out for him. He really appreciates that.

Joe studies him for moment longer before sighing lowly and shaking his head. "You kids and your inability to take your elder's advice..."

Barry chuckles and crosses his arms. "B-because you were any d-different wh-when you were my age?"

"Of course, I was the picture-perfect definition of an obedient son," agrees his friend easily. Barry rolls his eyes in fake exasperation.

"W-well, in that case I can only hope that, one day, I w-will reach the b-bar you've set for me and the r-rest of us young folks, J-Joe."

"Are you calling me old, Allen?"

"I would n-never," Barry assures with a cheeky grin, which causes Joe to bark out a laugh.

"The youth these days..."

"S-seriously, we are j-just horrible, aren't we?"

Joe chuckles and watches Barry for a moment with a fondness that always makes him feel better, no matter how crappy his day has been up until then.

"I guess you could be worse," amends his friend before he nods to the door. "You still want to grab a cup of coffee? Simmons has just made a fresh pot and you know us cops, as soon as we smell fresh coffee we make short business of it."

"S-sure," agrees Barry, but halts after taking a step when he notices that Joe hasn't moved yet despite his earlier words. Instead, his expression has become more thoughtful again.

"I am serious about Wells, Barry. Just be careful around him, okay?"

It is odd, realizing how concerned Joe actually is about Dr Wells, and a bit upsetting too because a part of Barry wants to tell him to stop, that the scientist is a good man. The truth is, though, he hardly knows anything about Dr Wells other than what he has learned in books or papers, and Joe is usually quite good at judging people.

Nobody is always right, though.

"I will," agrees Barry and he means it.

Joe searches his gaze for a second longer before his demeanour relaxes somewhat and his expression lightens again.

"I know you will, Barry, you are a clever kid."

"I am not a k-kid," he grumbles, but Joe only chuckles and finally turns to leave the room.

Barry follows close behind.


	11. Poker Night

"Damn, just the touch of this paper says money in big capital letters."

Barry glances over his shoulder back to where Lisa is sitting on her brother's rather rundown couch and is curiously eyeing the invitation he has gotten this morning – delivered to work, of all places.

"Do you think you can take someone with you?" the blond woman turns to him with a slightly hopeful look, "Usually invitations from such fancy events extend to a plusone." "It is a s-science conference, Lisa, not some high s-society ball," he points out and turns back to his cards. He doesn't miss that Sam has been leaning back next to him to peek at them.

"S-stop that," hiss Barry and pulls his hand closer to his chest, "No ch-cheating."

"I didn't see shit," amends the other man with a grin, "Not like you are having a Pair or something."

"Seriously?! Keep your d-damn eyes onyour own c-cards, y-you j-jackass!"

Sam's only response to his angry glare is to outright laugh in his face.

"Scudder," Len, who is sitting at the end of the table on Barry's other side, gives the other man a warning look, "I've told you that I will kick your scrawny arse out if I catch you cheating one more time."

"It was just a joke, Snart. I'm not cheating, scouts honour," chuckles the other man, but he lifts his hands in defeat when Len's expressions only darkens. He turns to Barry with an annoyed huff, "Sorry, man, but you didn't make it exactly hard to take a look."

"Still d-doesn't mean you have t-to," grumbles Barry and puts his cards down as this round has very much taken its course for him. He reaches for his beer and takes a sip.

Great, twenty dollars gone for nothing because of some stupid twerp…

"Sam will pay you back the money you've put into the game so far." Barry looks over to Len in surprise, who in turn is studying his cards calmly.

"Like hell, I will," Sam glares at the other criminal.

"You will pay him back for the money you've just cost him, Scudder," Len meets Sam's eyes calmly. There is no question that he is serious about it. Barry can actually feel the air between both man turn tense with sudden hostility and for an uncomfortable moment he fears that a fight might break out.

"It i-is fine, Len," he interjects and leans a bit forward so that he gets into the other man's line of vision. "I sh-should have taken b-better care of my cards. I am playing with y-you lot after all."

"Yeah, because that's usually the reason why you lose your money," snorts Mick as he reaches for the back of salted peanuts to grab a couple. After popping them into his mouth, he grabs the zippo again, which he has briefly put down and opens it. It briefly lights up before he snaps it shut again and repeats the whole thing just a couple of seconds later. A habit Mick indulges in constantly these days and Barry has actually gotten so used to the clicking sound of the thing that he hardly picks up on it anymore – it still annoys Len to no end, though, for many reasons.

"That or because he is just plain awful at it," Lisa agrees readily from her spot on the couch, still studying the invitation. She doesn't pay Barry's dark look any mind and instead pulls the paper close to her nose and takes a sniff, which cause her eyes to grow wide in surprise and amusement.

"Barry, I think they actually put perfume on it. You think they did that with all of them or is yours supposed to be a special case?"

Lisa winks at him and Barry decides that he is definitely not going to bother answering this. He turns his attention back to the other men at the table.

Thankfully, Sam doesn't seem to find the notion to start something with Len any more appealing than Barry himself as it turns out. After having tried to outstare the other man – a task Barry has never been able to succeed at – Sam huffs once more and rolls his eyes in annoyance.

"Fine, whatever, he will get the money," he grumbles. "You jackasses have no sense of humour."

"No, your humour just sucks." Mick's smirk widens into a grin when the other man flips him off in response.

"Are you really surprised, though? You know that Snart plays favourites with his little buddy, Scudder."

Barry glances over to where Mardon is seated next to Mick and his stomach makes an uncomfortable lurch when the other man meets his eyes with a cold and intense gaze.

Barry quickly looks away again.

"You have a problem with how I do things, Mardon?"

The way the other man glares at Len in response says volumes.

"Like allowing a fucking cop to linger around?" Mark drawls and pulls his upper lip back as he does so, showing his teeth in a way that reminds Barry a bit of a dog who is about to bite.

"We had this discussion already." Len has his focus on Mark now, his posture relaxed like he doesn't consider the other man to be any threat he couldn't handle – Barry is pretty sure he does that partly also because he knows how much it annoys Mardon – but there is a slight tension around his eyes that usually means that he's growing thin on his patience.

"No, we haven't," disagrees Mark and sneers, "You just decided that he can stay and didn't give a shit what the rest of us thought about it."

"I don't mind it if the beanpole stays," shrugs Mick as he takes a pull on his bottle. Mark gives him a dirty look for it.

"Yeah, don't make an arse out of yourself, Mardon," Lisa gets up and stretches herself like a cat, the invitation still in her right hand, before she turns to the them and fixes Mark with a frown. "Barry is non-negotiable."

As if to try and get at least someone to agree with him, Mark turns to Sam, who in turn lifts his eyebrows and chuckles.

"Dude, I seriously don't wanna get mixed up in this. I don't have a problem with the kid staying around as long as he doesn't cause me any trouble."

"Barry stays," confirms Len and meets the other criminals glare calmly, "As Lisa has said, it's non-negotiable."

Mark's expression turns so angry for a moment that Barry is certain he's going to do something stupid. It's a good thing that there are no weapons allowed during their poker nights – these people are just too short tempered for their own good.

Finally, after a long and tense minute of silence, Mark barks out a laugh, which sounds angrier than anything else, and shoves his chair back to get up. He throws his cards on the table and sneers at the others.

"Fuck that," he hisses. "You are all goddamn idiots. You think this won't come back to bite you? He's a _fucking cop_!"

Then the other man turns to Barry and the look Mark fixes him with gives him goose bumps all over.

"Fuck you, you miserable little shit."

He wants to say more, Barry can see it in his eyes – a threat, _clearly_ a threat – but he doesn't, because Len is there and it would probably not go over too well for him.

Instead, Mark grabs his jacket off the back of the chair and storms out of the flat.

Barry flinches when he slams the entrance door on his way out with enough force that it should have cracked.

An uncomfortable silence follows and he suddenly feels so ill at ease that he can't bring himself to meet anybody's eyes. He reaches for his beer, not because he wants to take a sip but because he needs something to hold onto, something to busy his hands with.

"Well, that wasn't melodramatic at all," snorts Sam and the tense mood lifts as if on a cue.

"Wouldn't be a poker night otherwise," grins Mick and opens his zippo once more before putting it on the table next to his beer, letting the small flame flicker in the light breeze that comes from the tilted window.

"He is angry b-because of his b-brother," Barry points out quietly and frowns down at the brown bottle in his hands.

"Clyde got himself into this situation, Bar. He was sloppy and that got him into prison."

Lisa has walked over to them by now and is standing next to him. He glances up at her with an unhappy expression.

"I-I am th-the one w-who proved it th-though."

"So what? You did your job and you are good at it," shrugs his friend as she squeezes in between him and Sam so that she can sit down on his lap. "He wasn't, and that is what got him into a cell at the Heights."

It's an odd way to look at it, Barry decides, even if it is more or less true. For Len and most of the other people he works with it sometimes seems to be some sort of a game what they are doing, complete with its own rules to follow, and as long as you play along accordingly there is no problem – no hard feelings, so to speak.

He wonders whether this will also be the case when his occupation gets one of the others in prison one day. It worries him. A lot.

Barry lays an arm around Lisa's back, so that his hand rests on her hip, and isn't bothered when she leans back so that she is resting against his chest.

"You worry too much," she tells him with a soft sigh and grabs the beer from his hand to take a sip.

"When does he not?" asks Mick with a smirk as he picks the cards up Mark has just thrown down onto the table next to him. His amused expression is replaced by a slight frown. "Good thing he left, that bastard had a Straight Flush."

Three hours later and after a second game – both of which Sam won, and there is _no way_ in hell that he didn't somehow cheat to do so – Mick and Sam take their leave to grab another couple of beers in the Saloon. Len declines the invitation to tag along, and so do Lisa and Barry.

The flat is much more quiet afterwards and more comfortable this way.

Barry helps the siblings with cleaning off the table and listens to Lisa's ideas of how Scudder could have cheated despite everybody keeping an eye on him as the man is infamous for it. He feels a bit drowsy and wonders whether Len would mind it if he crashed on the couch the tonight as the thought of making the long journey home at this hour is not very appealing to him.

"You have to make do with the floor next," explains Lisa after he asks her brother about it. "I'm also going to stay and I'm taking the couch."

"Y-you live n-not even two blocks from here."

"So what? I'm tired and it's already after one. You really want me to run into some shady people on my way home just so you can get comfy?"

Barry thinks about pointing out that she does so every other night and usually never has a problem with it but stays quiet when she glares warningly at him. Len has a sleeping bag and it isn't as if he hasn't slept on the floor before. He doesn't really mind.

"Anybody else want to order something to eat?" asks Lisa after their sleeping arrangements are settled. "What about Chinese? I could totally go for Chinese right now."

"I thought you're on a diet?"

The blond woman frowns in annoyance at her brother, who returns it with a smirk and a shrug.

"Sure, Chinese is fine."

"You know, I haven't drunk like 5000 calories in beer tonight, so I am not the one who should be worrying about their figure," grumbles Lisa and walks over to the small pinboard next to the entrance where a number of flyers from different restaurants can be found.

Len watches her for a moment, quite obviously amused, before he turns back to the kitchen table where Lisa has put the invitation for the science congress next week. He picks it up and lets his eyes fly over the printed words.

Barry, who has sat down on the couch by now, watches him a bit nervously. He told Len about this the day after Wells invited him and he immediately picked up on the fact that his friend didn't seem to share his delight over it. His friend could be ridiculously protective at times when it came to Lisa or him.

Contrary to Lisa, it doesn't really bother him all that much. It's nice to have someone looking out for him and Len has filled this role for years now.

"So," starts the other man, putting the invitation back down at the table as he turns his attention over to Barry, "you seem to have yourself quite a fancy admirer." Seeing that there is probably no right way to answer, Barry stays quiet.

Len studies him for a moment before he seems to take pity on his obvious discomfort.

"People like this Wells are usually trouble for men like you and me, Barry. Just keep that in mind."

"He hasn't g-given me any r-reason to th-think so, so f-far," argues Barry, a bit miffed that not only Joe seems to dislike Dr Wells for no real reason but Len seemingly as well.

"They usually don't till they get what they want."

"And what would that be?" he asks, giving into the urge to cross his arms in front of his chest. "I h-hardly am someone w-who can offer anyth-thing to begin w-with to a m-man like that."

"You are a bright young man, who isn't hard on the eyes either. I can think of a few thinks that man could want from you and that you are perfectly capable of offering."

Len walks over to Barry and stops in front of him. His eyes are cool and hard and Barry fights the urge to look away.

"I am not telling you not to go. You are old enough to decide such things on your own and you are probably more careful when it comes to these things than anybody else I know," the other man's frown vanishes and his expression softens a bit. "You are still young, though, and despite how many times fate has pushed you down, you still try to see the best in people, no matter whether they deserve it or not."

"H-he is not a b-bad person, Len, he has d-done so many good things for th-the city."

Having Len looming over him like this is uncomfortable—not really threatening, not like it would be with most other men, but it still causes him to feel slightly uneasy. It seems that his friend notices it, as he takes a step back. Barry relaxes a bit.

"And y-you don't even know him," he adds a bit sourly.

"Do you?"

Barry frowns and finally looks away.

It is a fair question and the honest answer would be no, at least apart from what he learned from books and such.

He knows that Len is about to say something else when Lisa cuts him off.

"I ordered lots and lots of Dim Sum, my dears, we are going to drown in dumplings in about thirty minutes and if it is going to be my end, then I will go with a smile on my lips," she declares happily. Despite his dimmed mood, Barry has to chuckle at her enthusiasm.

Lisa, like usual, quickly picks up that something has happened and glances between them with a lifted eyebrow before her gaze ends up on her brother. She purses her lips.

"You are being an overbearing jackass again, aren't you?"

"I am not," Len replies easily:" I am just telling him to be careful."

"Because the doctor could turn out to be some crazy scientist who wants to turn him into his sexy secretary?"

It is hard to miss the sarcasm in Lisa's voice.

"No, because this Wells is a rich man with powerful friends, and such people usually become rather nasty to deal with when you upset them in some way." Len is looking at Barry as he says this, eyes hard and cold.

"Aren't you a little Debbie Downer, Lenny?" huffs Lisa in annoyance. "Who the fuck has said anything about Barry committing his life to this guy? He's just been invited to some boring science conference, not to some ceremony that will steal his soul. Why do you have to spoil this for him?"

The siblings continue to stare each other down for a minute, and Barry can't help but be impressed once again by how Lisa has nearly no trouble at all doing so.

"I am not spoiling anything," Len – surprisingly enough – looks away first and turns back to Barry with another frown and slightly pursed lips. "I am just telling him to be careful."

"In that totally stifling way of yours," agrees Lisa with a nod and takes a seat next to Barry.

"I w-will be careful."

Experience has taught him that it is always better to be wary of things that seem too good to be true and the other man's words are just what he has been quietly worrying about for the last couple of days now as well. Still, it isn't exactly helping having Len speak them out loud for him, and he suddenly doesn't feel hungry anymore. He also doesn't feel like going to the conference anymore.

Right now, he just wants to go home and go to bed.

"Bar, don't look so crestfallen," Lisa grabs his wrist and gives it a slight squeeze so that he meets her eyes. "This is going to be a totally kickass event and I will be so damn envious of you."

"Y-you would be bored t-to no end, L-Lisa," he points out with a small smile. "There will be just talk about s-sciencey stuff and you d-don't like sciencey stuff."

"Hey, I like sciencey stuff! I watch Mythbusters with you all the time, remember?"

"Yes, b-because they usually blow things up."

"Which is the best kind of science, if you ask me."

Barry has to chuckle at that, which causes Lisa to grin triumphantly and bump their shoulders lightly together.

His smile quickly dims again when he notices that Len is still watching him with that serious expression.

"I will be careful, Len," he says again and cups the back of his neck with his hand while averting his eyes to the ground. "And it isn't as though th-this invitation m-means anything. I d-doubt that someone like Dr W-Wells really wants something from me. He p-probably is j-just trying to be n-nice."

"Oh for fuck's sake, Barry," Lisa hits his shoulder with actual force so that he flinches and shoots her an annoyed glare. "You are not the damn ugly duckling, so stop badmouthing yourself so much."

She then turns to Len and glowers at him.

"And you stop butting into other people's business and being so damn pessimistic all the time. If he wants to get into the pants of some rich scientist then let him."

"Lisa! I d-don-"

"I am just saying," she huffs and crosses her arms, "It's your life. I don't understand why Len always has to get himself involved in things that shouldn't even interest him!"

Barry watches his friend in surprise, pretty sure that she has no longer been speaking just about him, while Len grimaces as if he has just bitten into something really nasty.

Right… Dillon.

"Uh," he nervously rubs his palms on his thighs while alternating his gaze between the siblings. "S-somebody wants something t-to drink? I th-think tea would be g-good. You t-two want t-tea?"

Len cracks a smile and looks over to him while Lisa chuckles and let herself drop back against the back of the couch.

"Tea sucks," she informs him with a smirk. "It's bland and tastes like used dishwater."

Barry, who has been an avid lover of tea for as long as he can remember, frowns at her and is about to point out that the certainly doesn't suck and is very healthy for you at that, when Len cuts him off.

"Tea is fine. Fits the Chinese food we are going to have." "Because you pay attention to something like that," snorts his sister and rolls her eyes. "You think that it is disgusting too, don't deny it. You are just being friendly to Barry because you've made a total arse out of yourself – again."

Len ignores the quip and Barry decides that he is grateful for it because he doesn't want to talk about the upcoming conference or Dr Wells anymore. At least not around the other man. Thus, he gets up and makes his way to the small kitchen the apartment offers. He isn't really surprised when Len follows him while Lisa stays in the living area and turns on the TV.

The sound of the television is, for a while, the only noise in the flat as he fills up the water cooker and gets the cups and tea bags out. Thanks to him, Len has quite a decent stash of different kinds of tea. Green one, back ones, fruit and herbal teas, all of which Barry enjoys to make whenever he is over, and while Lisa has a point that her brother doesn't care particularly about them, Len still humours him and accepts a cup more often than not.

Barry can feel Len's gaze on him, but he busies himself with preparing the beverage. At least until his friend steps up to him, close enough that he can actually feel him next to him.

Barry pauses and hesitates for a moment before looking at him."You've picked chamomile?"

"Yeah, th-thought we could use something to c-calm down."

Len hums and the tension between them starts to cease again.

"You know that I didn't want to ruin your mood before."

It is formulated like a statement, but Barry knows that it is actually meant as a question. Len can be kind of complicated in that way.

"I know," he agrees quietly and picks up the electric kettle to fill the three cups with hot water. "And I will be caref-ful, Len, I am n-not stupid."

"No, you aren't."

Barry frowns down at the last cup, watching how the water gets tinted a very pale yellow.

"He d-doesn't seem like a b-bad person."

He glances over to Len who is still studying him.

"He seems n-nice."

"Okay."

His friend doesn't seem to like his fondness of Dr Wells any more now than he has ten minutes ago, but he doesn't look as frustrated by it anymore. Barry gives him a hesitant smile and chuckles somewhat awkwardly.

"You kn-know that he probably i-is just nice to m-me for a t-totally platonic reason, r-right?"

"I don't think that you put thousands of dollars into police equipment just so you can stay in contact with someone because you want to have a platonic friendship with them," replies Len drily but smirks when Barry grows crimson again.

"Look, Lisa has a point, as long as he doesn't turn out to be some deranged mad scientist, it really is none of my business."

"B-but it is if he d-does?"

Barry feels even more awkward as soon as the words are past his lips.

Len gives him a look like he is an idiot in response and he takes it with as much quiet grace as he can. Still, despite that, a pleasant warmth spreads through his belly and the feeling of apprehensions which has been following him since he has gotten the invitation earlier today abates somewhat.

"Thanks, Len."

It's nice having someone look out for him, even if that someone is quite overbearing at times.

The ringing of the doorbell causes him to jumps slightly and he looks toward the living room, where Lisa has already gotten up to get to the door.

"Seems the food has arrived," points Len out rather unnecessarily before he grabs two of the mugs and adds with a smirk, "Let's get out there before Lisa devours all of those dumplings."

Barry chuckles and follows him out of the kitchen.


	12. The Science Conference Part I

It is pointed out by Hartley that Barry has arrived. Eobard is currently talking to a small group of military-funded scientists who are ridiculously excited to get to know him, and he's relieved that he finally has a reason to excuse himself, at least for a while. They remind him a little too much like puppies that want the approval of their owner. It's outright annoying. He had always been disgusted these kind of people, so weak and desperate to please…

A very small part of him, one he usually tries to smother by sheer will, reminds him that this is most likely due to how similar they are to how he once was such a long time ago, so eager to be recognized for his potential. Pitiful…

"Great," mutters the young S.T.A.R. lab scientist under his breath and Eobard glances over to him. "I can't believe he actually showed up."

The cacophony of people, of voices, and the quiet and discreet music suddenly seem to dim as he immediately understands the cause of Hartley's frustration/agitation. It is difficult to keep a very satisfied smile off his face as Eobard turns to face the entrance, and it becomes even harder when he finally makes out the young blond man who so obviously feels out of place standing there.

Barry Allen lingers just in front of the glass entrance doors, glancing around nervously, clearly uncertain of what to do next. A couple of other guests that are close to him give him confused and curious glances, seeing that he has to be lacking around ten to forty years of assumed experience in comparison to most of the women and men present, with the exception of the few younger S.T.A.R. labs members here this afternoon. He is holding the handle of his closed umbrella with both hands, looking a bit like he is ready to smack anybody who tries to approach him over the head.

Eobard has to smile.

It certainly doesn't help that Barry isn't wearing an expensive dress suit like most, but has instead simply added a dark pair of slacks to the usual coat he wears for work most days. He has peppered it up with a tie and is wearing nicer shoes instead of the usual sneakers he prefers, but that's the extent it.

The young man stand out like a sore thumb.

Eobard thinks that he looks rather handsome.

"He couldn't even rent a suit for this? _Really_?"

Hartley's disdain for the blond is so apparent in his tone of voice that it causes a few of the other surrounding scientists, who have noticed the reason for Dr Wells' sudden lack of attention, to study Barry as well with expressions that range from amused to unimpressed.

"_Hartley_," admonishes Caitlin with a soft huff, but her colleague doesn't even bother to acknowledge her.

The young man's attitude towards Barry, while somewhat entertaining at times, has started to grate on Eobard's nerves by now. Hartley is usually careful not to mention Barry around him, not since the dress down he gave him for this reckless stunt a few months ago, but his mood has been truly abysmal since he learned of Barry's invitation to the conference about a week ago.

"Hartley," Eobard starts in his calmest voice, "why don't you and Caitlin go and tell those gentlemen over there about the progress we've made with adjusting the electromagnetic fields for the second stage period? I think I'll go and greet the newest addition to our group."

He gives Hartley a smile that is friendly and honest enough, but also holds a slight warning in case his young colleague actually considers disagreeing. Hartley frowns and purses his lips in displeasure for a second, holding his gaze with a silent anger that amuses Eobard whenever he grows bold enough to actually do so. Still, after just a moment, he nods and agrees tersely to go along with Caitlin.

When Eobard turns back to Barry, he notices that he has spotted them by now and is watching them. At least, up until he meets Eobard's gaze, which causes him to look away quickly enough to give himself whiplash. A blush starts to creep over his cheeks, intense enough that Eobard can make it out all the way from even over here and it's quite an interesting and oddly endearing thing to see.

A couple of people try to stop and talk to Eobard but he declines them politely as he makes his way over to Barry, who is now attentively studying the floor in front of his feet, shifting his weight nervously from one foot to the other about every other second, obviously lamenting on whether or not to stay there or just turn and run.

Eobard hopes it won't be the latter, as he has really no desire to leave the building just so he can catch up with him, not with how the rain outside seems to be growing worse with every passing minute. He would chase after him, though, if he had to. He doesn't even have to think about it, and this knowledge alone is both frustrating and somewhat amusing at the same time.

His comes to a stop about an arm's length from the young blond man; the sudden pause in Barry's movement tells him that he has very much picked up on Eobard's presence. Hesitantly, Barry looks up with wide eyes. His death grip on the poor umbrella seems to briefly worsen enough that Harrison is sure that it's going to cause the plastic handle to snap any second now.

"I-I am t-totally u-underd-dressed, a-aren't I?"

The blurted question catches Eobard off-guard. It's about the last thing he would have expected Barry to say, and while Barry looks utterly miserable about it, Eobard can't help but chuckle in response.

"Hello, Mr Allen." He smiles and watches how the flush on the younger man's face intensifies. Then he seemingly remembers his manners and says, "I'm glad to see you could make it."

He holds Barry's unhappy and worried gaze for a moment before adding in a softer tone, "And I think you look rather handsome, to be honest."

Barry's eyes widen a fraction and he stares at him in a mixture of disbelief and an emotion Eobard isn't certain how to name before he hastily averts his gaze again.

"Th-thanks," Barry utters as he awkwardly rubs his neck. "Uh, I-I… y-you l-look g-good t-too…"

Barry beaks off, just as he seems to realize what he is actually saying. If Eobard could bet on anything, it would be that the blond is currently wishing for the ground to open up and swallow him whole judging by how embarrassed he seems over the attempted response.

"Why, thank you, Mr Allen." Eobard breaks the uncomfortable moment with a light and subtly playful tone. "It's quite nice for someone to finally notice."

Clearly surprised by the little quip, Barry laughs before he quickly catches himself and nervously glances around the room. Eobard watches him curiously. There is the urge again to step closer and touch him. It is coiling up somewhere deep inside his lower abdomen, close to his loins. It is _so_ _very_ hard not to just give in…

"I am s-sorry f-for being l-late." Barry turns his attention back to him, cheeks still flushed, and starts awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to the other again. "The t-traffic is r-rather b-bad due to th-the w-weather."

"I can imagine," smiles Eobard, and judging by how the sky has turned into a dark greyish thick mass and opened its portals no more than two hours ago he really isn't surprised that Barry has run into a bit of trouble with the public traffic system – the bus connection from Central to the closest stop to S.T.A.R. labs is rather lacking on sunny days as it is.

His reaction seems to calm Barry a bit as the worst of his tension starts to leave his body. Eobard watches how the young man gives him a faint smile in return before Barry quickly looks back down at the ground and restlessly fiddles with the umbrella he is still holding in both of his hands.

Eobard gets goosebumps when Barry briefly licks his lips before biting his lower one nervously, probably not even noticing that he is doing so.

"I… th-thank you f-for the inv-vitation a-and… c-coming o-over t-to greet m-me b-but I d-don't want to k-keep you f-from… you kn-know." Barry shrugs helplessly and his gaze darts behind Eobard, briefly over the mass of people who seem to be doing a good job intimidating him without even noticing him in the first place.

The anxiousness the young man is giving off is hard to miss. Eobard wants to touch him so badly right now, kiss him, pull him close, bury his nose into his neck and take in his scent, feel his lithe body under his hands. It is hard to not give in and make Barry understand that there is nothing he can keep from Eobard, but rather that Eobard is being kept from him – that it has been like this forever and he is really getting fed up with their prolonged separation now.

"You don't, Mr Allen," he says instead, much calmer than he feels. "You are also on the guest list, aren't you? And contrary to about 99% of the other attendees here tonight, I have actually been looking forward to your company."

Barry's eyes widen briefly and his blush intensifies again. He seems at an utter loss how to respond. Eobard takes pity on him. "Let's get your things to the coatroom before I show you around a bit."

For a moment it looks like Barry isn't going to answer. The intense blue eyes keep staring at him in a way that reminds Eobard of someone rattling their brain as they try to figure out a riddle that's gone completely over their head. Although, Barry doesn't just seem curious, but rather also confused and slightly worried.

"If you-"

A loud and booming roll of thunder overhead cuts Eobard off short. It sounds like the sky has been cracked in half, the conversation around them briefly growing faint as everyone present is a bit taken aback by mother nature's display of force.

Eobard doesn't pay the weather any mind. His eyes are on Barry, who has cringed like someone who'd just been hit.

"Are you alright, Mr Allen?"

A stupid question, really, seeing that Barry has had a fear of storms since a very young age. Since that night…

Well, this at least explains why he is so extremely on edge. It is a bit of a relief, really, because Eobard, while expecting Barry to be nervous today, hadn't thought that it would unsettle him this badly.

"Y-yeah, f-fine," Barry mutters, but he looks as white as a sheet as he forces himself to meet his eyes again. "J-just n-not th-the b-biggest f-fan of s-storms." Barry grimaces and while there are quite a number of reasons behind this reaction, Eobard is pretty sure that it is due to his continuingly worsening stutter. It is always a clear and easy indicator of how the younger man is feeling.

"I can assure you—" Eobard steps a bit closer to him, watching with a mix of annoyance and amusement how the young man suddenly freezes up again like a deer in the headlights of a car "— there is no danger of you being hit by lightning while you are in my facility."

"Ok-kay," Barry agrees faintly before he nervously licks his lips and averts his eyes. The grip on his umbrella has gotten so tight that his knuckles have turned white and Eobard decides that he is definitely getting him some of the campaign to drink – if he keeps it up like this, Barry is going to start hyperventilating before any of damn presentations have even started.

"Come, let's get you rid of your coat and umbrella."

Barry jerks his head in agreement. Eobard is a bit relieved by the lack of protest. This is definitely going to be a much more interesting afternoon than he has already anticipated.


	13. The Science Conference Part II

"N-no," Barry shakes his head and awkwardly rubs his sweaty palms on his pants before he realizes what he is doing and forces himself to stop. "I was inv-vestigating the b-basement when the hhostage situation started. I d-didn't really realize what w-was happening until I w-went up to re-join th-the others."

"That had to be quite scary," remarks one of the younger female scientists, Emma Ansel, in a very thick dialect. She belonged to one of the facilities overseas that was currently working together with S.T.A.R. labs, along with two of her colleagues who were also present in the small circle of people Barry has currently joined.

"I think it's scarier to think that our police force is unable to investigate a place without getting themselves into such a mess." Hartley, who is standing opposite to him and who had started to check his phone in an open display of disinterest as soon as the conversation turned to Barry and what he is doing as an occupation, glances up with a frown. "Your people didn't think to check the building before starting your 'investigation'?"

The last word is spoken with distinct mockery. Barry notices Dr Wells shifting his weight slightly next to him. Wells and Hartley had just returned after leaving him with Caitlin for about half an hour as they needed to talk to a couple guys from the military after the presentations had ended, and while Barry was glad that Dr Wells was back again, he couldn't say the same about the young scientist.

"We did." Barry shrugs and returns Hartley's unpleasant stare unflinchingly. "B-but they'd been llucky. They knew of a s-secret panic r-room w-we had no idea e-even e-existed."

"Sloppy," mutters the other, man but he returns his attention to his mobile phone after briefly glancing over to his employer, probably realizing that it was better for him to end his participation in this conversation now lest he be reprimanded by the man again

"I have actually been in a couple of hostage situations myself."

The sudden statement seems to catch everybody by surprise and so they collectively turn their attention to the tall brunette man in the very smart and very expensive looking business suit. The man in question had introduced himself to Barry earlier as Ray Palmer – THE freaking billionaire, Ray Palmer.

"Each individual occasion had been a truly interesting experience, to be honest."

Barry has no idea what to think about Ray's almost chirpy attitude concerning the whole affair.. The one hostage situation Barry was in had been so nerve-racking and frightening that he prefers not to touch upon the subject to this day.

Hartley grumbles something under his breath, too low for anybody to make out, and shoots the billionaire a look as if his mere presence is painful to him. Mr Palmer is completely oblivious to it.

Well, it _is_ kind of reassuring that Hartley doesn't seem to dislike only Barry, at least.

"You _are_ the CEO of a billion dollar company, Mr. Palmer," chuckles Ron Strobovich, a bald man in his late fifties, who seemed to be a business partner of Palmer's. "It comes with the package. People are out to get you."

"It's a good thing I have an apt security team then."

"For the money you pay them, you better have."

It is odd to be in the presence of people such as Ray Palmer. Not only the rich or the smart but also the important people who ardently influenced the lives of other people every day by their business decisions and inventions. Barry feels very out of place.

"Especially with that crazy nutcase that is going around shooting people in your city."

This catches his attention, although Barry isn't the only one who suddenly seems to listen more avidly now to the older man.

"Nutcase?" asks one of the young scientists curiously. Barry tries to think of his name but can't remember.

Palmer frowns and scratches the back of his neck while he seems to consider what to say.

"The police are still denying that there is really only one person responsible for those incidents," he starts slowly with a slight shrug. "The media is all over it but there seems to be still too little evidence to make a decisive statement about what exactly is going on."

"You are talking about the person who goes after the rich people of Starling City?" asks Emma, which causes her colleagues to shoot her a surprised glance.

"I have heard he is supposed to be like a modern Robin Hood," she goes on. "The internet has many blogs dedicated to him."

"He is a psycho who kills people," interjects Hartley, looking at the woman next to him as if she is an utter idiot. She blushes in embarrassment and utters a small protest before falling quiet again.

"Starling City seems to get the worst people," says Strobovich with a heavy sigh. "It has never been a safe city, but over the last two decades it has started to grow exceedingly worse."

Barry has never been to Starling City – or really _anywhere_ outside the Twins other than Kansas City – but Len knows people from there and has done a couple of jobs with them over the years. He seems to like the city well enough, though this is likely also due to him not having to worry about being mugged or assaulted on the streets. Len's appearance doesn't exactly scream 'victim' to others, after all.

"Well, Palmer Industries is definitely going to change that," says Palmer with the certainty of someone who doesn't consider failure even an option. "Our new facilities will help the people of Starling City who are unlucky enough to lose their footing in life, and that in turn will change the City itself."

"You think the criminals will give up their lifestyle for some blue-collar job?" asks Hartley, not bothering to hide how little he thinks of that idea. Barry would like to know whether he is really such a pessimistic and cranky person or whether it is just an act – he wonders once again how the other people at S.T.A.R. labs are able to work together with Hartley.

"We give them the option," agrees Palmer easily, not in the slightest put out by the other man's tone. "But we will also try to support the police. There have been so many budget cuts over the last couple of years I am surprised they are able to even hire new cops at all."

"Aren't you doing so as well, Harrison?" Strobovich turns to Dr Wells with a smirk, "Using your scientific expertise for good and such?"

"I try to," agrees Wells with a faint smile, and Barry, who has turned to stare at him as well, gets the feeling that he doesn't care particularly much for the other man.

"It certainly is good publicity and you will need it with what you have up your sleeve for Central City. You will have to use all the good grace you can get right now so that they don't put you away once you've blown a hole into it."

It is spoken in such an amiable and light tone that, for a second, Barry isn't sure whether he has understood the man correctly. Judging by how everybody else in their small circle has paused in their own little conversations to watch both of the men with a nearly palpable tension, he probably hasn't though.

"What the hell?" huffs Hartley, breaking the uncomfortable silence. "We aren't incompetent idiots and we are certainly not going to blow ourselves up. Maybe you should be more concerned with where you're getting your information from than how we do our jobs, because _you_ have clearly no idea what you are talking."

Barry can't help but be a bit impressed by the young scientist. Hartley doesn't seem to be intimidated at all by Strobovich and the intense glare he is giving the older man makes it obvious that he dares him to start a fight over this with him. Strobovich, on the other hand, seems briefly taken aback by Hartley butting in like this, but is now studying him in obvious amusement.

"Oh, I am sure you think so, my boy," the older man nods. "But you are intending to play with fire before you have even learned how you can put it out again."

Hartley looks about ready to really jump him and beat the ever-loving light out of him. His jaw is set and his fists are clenched and there is a fury in his eyes that is quite unsettling.

Strobovich doesn't seem intimidated in the least. He watches Hartley with a curious smirk and not a trace of worry.

"I am certain Dr Rathaway appreciates your concern just as much as I do." Dr Wells voice is smooth and calm as he meets Strobovich's gaze, but there is a tightness around his eyes and a tension in his stance that make it very obvious that this is bothering him. "But I can assure you that S.T.A.R. labs would never consider doing any research in areas we are not completely convinced we are prepared to handle."

The smile Dr Wells gives Strobovich is thin and not very kind and Barry suddenly has the odd urge to warn the older man to back off, for his own sake. It is unexpected and catches him utterly unprepared.

Wells' glances over to him, as if he has heard his thoughts, and a slight frown crosses his face before it is gone again and he turns back to Strobovich.

"I have to excuse myself now, I promised to show Mr. Allen one of my current pet-projects and it is getting rather late as it is."

Barry gives him a surprised and slightly confused look as the other man has done nothing of the sort. He quickly schools his features, though, as he does want to get away from the crowd and all the noise. It has been a nice experience, much better than he had dared to hope for, but he has also realized that he is not someone who enjoys these kind of events other than for the actual science involved.

"Of course," agrees Strobovich, briefly studying Barry in a considering way that is quite unsettling before he chuckles, "You are not going to introduce him to Eiling, though?"

Wells actually snorts at that. The quiet tension is suddenly gone again and he gives the other man a look that is both honestly amused and quite annoyed.

"No, I think some introductions are better not made."

Strobovich actually barks out a laugh at that, and Barry is so caught off-guard by the sudden shift between these two men, that he wonders whether he has just missed something.

"Yes, the good general is not for the faint of heart, that is for sure."

Barry frowns, pretty sure that he has just been insulted, which is only validated when he notices Hartley's rather spiteful grin. He gives the scientist a half-hearted glare but leaves it at that.

A slight touch to his elbow causes him to tense up and he looks over to Wells, who is meeting his wide eyes with a slight but warm smile. It causes a familiar sensation of warmth to spread through Barry's abdomen, and while the notion of spending some time alone with the other man makes him a bit nervous, it also starts to become incredibly appealing at the same time.

Out of the corner of his eyes he notices Hartley scowling at him and he suddenly starts to wonder whether there is another reason for his dislike. The notion doesn't sit well with him and while he feels a bit bad for the other young man, he quickly agrees when Dr Wells asks him whether he would like for them to leave now.

It is quite satisfying seeing how Wells is when Barry doesn't hesitate to follow when his leads to the elevator and away from this crowd of noisy people.


	14. The Science Conference Part III

As soon as the elevator doors close and cut them off from the still ongoing party, a well-known tension starts to settle over Barry as he becomes all too away how close to him Dr. Wells is standing, even though the cab is quite spacious. He thinks about stepping a bit to the side to get some additional distance between them but it would likely appear rude and the other man has been nothing but kind to him tonight.

It is when Barry glances at the floor display panel that he notices that the eighth subfloor level is selected, which causes him to do a double-take because he hadn't ever thought that this facility would go this far underground…

Then again, it probably shouldn't be such a big surprise. He is one of the few civilians in the Twins who knows that there is even something below the second underground level and the notion in itself is just odd.

"How did you like your first science conference so far?"

Barry turns to Wells and is made all too aware again of how close they are, which causes his cheeks to grow uncomfortably warm. He forces himself to still meet his eyes, though, because, really, he has been behaving like such a teenager lately, becoming a bit fed up by his own inability to not make an idiot out of himself around the other man. It's just silly.

"It w-was great. I enjoyed the presentations very m-much and it was incredibly informative to learn what is currently g-going on in the s-science world reg-garding finding alternative energy s-sources. Doctor Elias' i-idea of the m-monorail was especially i-interesting." Barry was quite impressed by the concept as a free mean of public transportation that could run on self-renewable fuels. It would certainly benefit a lot of people in the gem cities.

Dr. Elias was another bright mind that had influenced him a lot during his teenage years. Currently, he was one of the smartest and wealthiest people the gems had to offer, and his books were always a treat to read. At times, Barry secretly found that Dr. Elias wrote them a tad better than Dr. Wells. They were usually a bit easier to understand since Dr. Elias liked to interweave everything with real life examples and a healthy portion of humour, so much so that Barry was usually able to breeze right through them, whereas Dr. Wells' tended to keep his books very clinical, concentrating more on the mathematical aspect of his work which made it a bit more difficult to really grasp. Even so, Barry has always enjoyed both men's books and would never be presumptuous enough to bring this up in the presence of Dr. Wells.

"Yes, Darwin is quite a bright man," agrees Wells but the sour expression that crosses his face for a moment makes it rather obvious that he isn't all too fond of the other scientist. "And he likes to hear himself talk. A lot."

Barry has to laugh at that, and, after considering it, he has to agree with him. Dr. Elias really seems like someone who loves to have everybody's attention. Not in an arrogant way, though. It seems like he just has so many ideas and knowledge to share with other people, which is, in its own way, quite endearing. He didn't seem annoyed when people asked him questions after his presentation, even though it was obvious that some of them clearly doubted the reality of his idea. Contrary to most other scientists, he seemed to enjoy the opportunity to talk openly with his audience about his project.

"He had a l-lot of interesting things to s-say," Barry points out. "And th-the small waving engineman in th-the clip w-was just f-funny."

Harrison Wells grimaces and gives him a look as though he has just been insulted by this kind of humour. Barry chuckles and rolls his eyes.

"Just saying how it is," he shrugs and turns his attention back to the door of the elevator when they reach their floor. They both exit it and Barry immediately notices that there is something different about this level compared to the other ones.

"You like to do that."

Barry looks back to Dr. Wells, unsure what to make of that statement or how the other man's eyes seem to grow darker with something he doesn't dare to give a name.

They silently watch each other, the tingling sensation in his stomach coming back in full force as he realizes he hasn't the slightest idea what he is doing. He licks his lips then and doesn't miss how Well's gaze immediately drops to them, watching the motion with an expression that is obviously keenly interested and-

The sound of the doors of the elevator closing behind them causes both of them to snap out of… of whatever had just passed between them, and Barry takes a small step back, away from the other man because…

… he has no idea.

Dr. Wells is watching him, no longer with such intensity but with a more thoughtful expression. There is something troubled to his eyes as he studies him and Barry wonders what he is thinking, whether he is regretting what has just happened, whether he thinks of his former wife or how big the age gap between them really is.

The lust in Dr. Wells' eyes has been unmistakable, and while Barry has realized by now that he really seems to be interested in him, it is still completely different to experience it this directly, without cautious words and carefully masked expressions between them.

Then, Dr. Wells reaches up and takes off his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose, exhaling deeply and with audible frustration, making Barry worry that his visit to the S.T.A.R. laboratories is about to come to an abrupt end.

To his surprise, the other man doesn't look angry or ashamed or even just frustrated when he focuses his gaze back on him, but instead gives him a small and surprisingly apologetic looking smile.

"You are a very bright and attentive young man, Mr. Allen, therefore I doubt you haven't picked up on my…" Dr. Wells hesitates for a second, seeming to search for something in Barry's face, maybe a sign that could tell him what kind of reaction he should expect from him, before he slowly goes on, "…_interest_ in you."

That particular words gives Barry goose bumps all over. He swallows as his mouth feels incredibly dry all of a sudden. Dr. Wells gaze drops to his throat, probably watching the movement of his Adam's apple as it bobs, and there is something so ridiculously arousing about all of this…

"Y-you…" Barry has to clear his throat and feels the familiar sensation of his cheeks being on fire return as the other man meets his eyes again. "Y-you haven't b-been very s-subtle ab-bout it."

This causes the scientist to arch his eyebrows, an amused smirk taking over his lips, while some of the apprehension, which seemed to have thicken the air between them even though Dr. Wells tried not to show it, eases away from him.

"I beg your pardon?" he asks, taking a step closer to him – there is something to the way he is watching Barry now that causes something in his lower abdomen to tighten, not in a bad way but enough that it causes a slight shudder to go through him. Dr. Wells doesn't miss it. His smirk widens a bit and there is suddenly sharpness to his gaze that hasn't been there just a second ago. "Are you telling me I haven't been subtle in my attempts to get your attention?"

Barry's eyes widen, not expecting him to be this blunt about it. He had expected Dr. Wells… well, maybe not to _directly_ deny it, but at least just ignore his insinuation.

And, wait a minute, he actually _wanted_ to get his attention?! What the…

"Y-you really g-gave the CCPD all this equ-quipment b-because you…" Barry frowns and doesn't even want to begin to consider how much money was involved in this little seduction. This is just _ridiculous_. "You c-could have tried f-flowers, you kn-know?"

Wells lifts an eyebrow in amusement, and it is then that Barry realizes how close he has actually gotten. He nervously licks his lips and curses this habit as soon as he realizes what he has done because, once again, the other man's gaze drops to them, looking both aroused and a bit mesmerized.

It is such an odd feeling having someone look at him like this, like he is something desirable. It nearly causes him to laugh at the absurdity of it all while another part of him tells him to turn around right now and bolt out of here while he still can. People have watched him in a similar way in the past, men who were also much older than Barry, and he knows exactly what this means.

Another shudder goes through him. This time there is nothing arousing or comfortable about it.

Barry tenses up when Dr. Well's eyes snap back up to meet his and he wonders whether he can see the fear he is feeling right now. Swallowing again, he takes a step back and crosses his arms in front of his chest defensively.

A tense silence follows.

He focuses his gaze on the floor; Barry can't bring himself to look at him. He feels ashamed of how messed up he is. There is _no _way that he hasn't just ruined this, whatever _this_ would have turned out to be…

Barry tenses up and glances back at Dr. Wells when he notices the man stepping a bit closer again. The worry has to be plain on his face as the other man lifts his hands in a placating manner, as if to show him that he means no harm.

"I think I've let myself get carried away a bit, Mr. Allen." Dr Wells' voice is low and calm and the arousal is gone from his eyes as he looks at him now, replaced by slight concern. "I am very sorry if I have caused you any discomfort."

There is so much Barry wants to say right then.

Everything is too uncomfortable and still too personal for Barry to share it with him just now, though. He hardly ever talks to Len about this and his friend is the only one whom he has ever outright trusted with the ugly burden he is forced to carry around with himself through every day and every night of his life.

"I-it isn't your f-fault." He glances back to Dr. Wells with an unhappy frown. "I am… I am v-very… I… I usually d-don't…"

Barry breaks of and swears in frustration. He is angry at himself for being like this, unable to get one straight sentence out and instead making an utter fool out of himself again.

"D-damn," he clenches his teeth and turns away from the other man, too embarrassed to face him.

This is definitely not how he had hoped that this day would turn out.

"S-sorry," Barry mutters, uncrossing his arms so that he can rub his hands over his face. It's a bit easier to talk to the empty floor in front of him than to Dr. Wells. "I a-am n-not good at th-this… I-I… s-someth-thing h-happened wh-when I w-was younger a-and…"

God, this is so painfully embarrassing. Why couldn't he just shut up? The other man certainly doesn't need nor want to know how messed-up he is. He's probably already decided that he just wasted who knows how many thousands of dollars on someone like him.

The notion hurts…

Barry takes in a shuddering breath and forces his arms to rest on his side with his fists balled while he is looking straight ahead into the long corridor in front of him. His eyes are itching and he blinks to keep the tears in check as he doesn't want to turn this into an even more uncomfortable and embarrassing situation for either of them.

"I-I like you, a l-lot b-but I… I d-don't know-"

"Mr. Allen…" The other man is suddenly so close that Barry thinks he can actually feel his breath on his neck, which causes him to wince and whirl around, eyes wide and his heart thumping up against his throat. He hadn't heard him come closer or move at all.

Then again, he isn't really that surprised, seeing that he has more or less lost himself as he wallowed in his own misery…

"Barry." Wells watches him as if he isn't sure what he should say – uncertain and hesitant and worried. Barry can't help but think that it isn't right that he should cause this otherwise always so secure and certain looking man to feel like that. It's not what he wants…

"I didn't intend to bring this up," says Wells, frowning. "Not yet and not like this. I am really sorry if this made you feel uneasy, it wasn't my intention."

Barry isn't sure how to reply. The notion that the other man wanted to actually act on his interest to him and tell him about it is both slightly scary and flattering.

"You d-didn't," he protests but concedes when Wells gives him a rather incredulous look. "I m-mean, it f-freaked m-me out a b-bit but not b-because of you." He rubs his neck, feeling awkward and uncertain how to explain why he reacted the way he did. Most of the time it is hard even for him to understand.

"I… there…" Barry averts his eyes so that he frowns at the closed elevator doors. "Th-things happened t-to m-me, u-ugly th-things…"

His face feels hot and the embarrassment causes a familiar unrest to overcome him, so that he starts to nervously shift his weight from on leg to the other. The need to move always becomes so strong when he is in this kind of mood. He never seems to be able to hold still for more than a moment.

A part of him wants to share a bit of this heavy secret with Wells because he hopes that he would understand and would not be put off by it. People never seem to see him in the same way after they have learned about the abuse, but he wants to believe that it would be different with him.

"They m-made it d-diffic-cult for m-me to… t-to…"

Barry is suddenly certain that he is ruining this – whatever this is or _could_ be between them – in a spectacular way and his voice simply gives out. He snaps his mouth shut, clenches his teeth and hates himself and the world in large for making him like this, for ruining any chance to be normal and not broken.

There is a familiar pressure behind his eyes that cause his vision to blur as he glares at the elevator doors as if they were the reason for everything bad that has happened to him. He just can't bring himself to look back at Wells.

An uncomfortable silence settles between them for what feels like hours but is probably nothing more than ten seconds or so before Barry notices the other man shift out of the corner of his eyes. He tries to brace himself for the inevitable and takes a deep breath before he looks back to him.

Dr. Wells doesn't look at him like he is another person who he is seeing for the first time. There is no pity, no disgust, and no outright discomfort to be in his presence. Instead, Barry recognizes concern, sympathy, anger, and something else, something very faint, almost akin to… regret?

"I'm sorry that you've been hurt." Wells studies him with a very sombre expression. "And I am sorry that I've caused you to remember this."

"It's n-not your fault," Barry rubs his neck again and shrugs. "Bad th-things just happen s-sometimes and I am r-rather g-good at d-dealing with it to b-be honest, b-but…" His cheeks grow warm and he nervously gnaws on his lower lip for a second as his eyes move back on the elevator. "I am j-just not used t-to…"

Barry makes an uncertain gesture between both of them, glancing back at Wells with an unhappy frown. "I got a bit o-overwhelmed and… I'm s-sorry."

"There is nothing for you to be sorry about, Mr. Allen. I can understand why you've reacted the way you did." The other man's expression is still grim but the tightness around his eyes eases away a bit as he speaks. He studies him for a second longer. "I can bring you back up if you prefer to leave."

It is a bit of a tempting offer but Barry knows that nothing of what has just happened is Dr. Wells fault – at least no more than his own – and it would probably hurt him if he accepts.

"No, I am actually looking forward to wh-whatever you want to show me," Barry tells him and it isn't a lie. He has wondered about this so-called "pet-project" since Dr. Wells first mentioned it. "What if I just wanted to get somewhere less crowded?" Wells doesn't sound like he is trying to flirt, but it is an honest question that causes Barry to chuckle and shrug.

"F-fine with me as w-well. I d-don't mind a bit of a b-break after the last c-couple of hours."

"I thought you've enjoyed it?"

"I did," assures Barry, worrying that he has insulted him by accident. "It w-was inter-resting and very educational and I c-can probably cross off like t-two thirds of the n-names on m-my "People I have to meet before dying" list."

"I take it that most of your idols are from the scientific field?" asks Dr. Wells and he seems quite amused by this. It causes Barry to blush a bit, but he nod nonetheless as he is sure that, if there is anybody who would not see him as a dork and understand it would be him. "Was Dr. Elias also on that list?"

"Uh…" Barry is not sure how to answer that question, seeing how Dr. Wells is now watching him carefully. It is a bit of a relief when the other man's serious expression cracks a second later and he starts to chuckle.

"Darwin is quite popular, isn't he?" Dr. Wells indicates Barry to follow him as he starts to walk down the long corridor. "He has always had charisma."

"He is funny," remarks Barry carefully, wondering whether there is some kind of feud or at least a slight animosity going on between the man next to him and Dr. Elias. When he had seen them exchange a couple of words after Dr. Wells' presentation, it had been hard to miss how forced either of their smiles and exchanged niceties had been. Their mutual discomfort was palpable enough that Barry actually decided to stay in the background despite his initial hope to speak to another one of the brightest minds the Twins – and the scientific world at large – have to offer.

"He is full of himself," Dr. Wells replies drily. "He is also well aware of how easily he can make people eat out of the palm of his hand."

"You d-don't like him very much." Barry starts to takes their surroundings in and realizes that it looks like this level is still under construction. He wonders whether another number of laboratories are going to be put down here but quickly dismisses the idea again when he picks up on the layout, which is quite different to the other levels he has seen so far.

"I don't like people challenging me."

Barry looks back to the man next to him and gives him a questioning look. "Dr. Elias ch-challenged you?" The notion of Dr Elias slapping Dr Wells across his face with a white glove comes to his mind and he has to fight back a grin.

"He tried to snatch the funding for the particle accelerator from under my nose and nearly succeeded." Wells purses his lips for a moment, looking honestly annoyed by whatever memory is currently on his mind. "He doesn't mind to play dirty to get what he wants."

That… is not what Barry expected to hear. Dr. Elias always seemed so nice. Well, not that Barry has ever met him personally, but in the couple of interviews he has seen of him on television and his writing made Dr. Elias out to be someone he would like to meet. Not that Barry isn't aware of how little you can judge someone by how they appear to be without actually talking to them. For example, he _never _would have thought that Dr. Wells would be… well, like this, to be honest.

"You did get the f-founding, though?" Barry stops next to him in front of a door and watches how he flicks a card over the scanner before he starting to enter a series of numbers on the display.

"We did indeed," agrees Wells and seems quite pleased to be able to say so.

They enter another corridor, one that is a bit lower and narrower. Barry studies all the pipes and hoses on the ceiling that seem to be just provisionally fixed in place for now. There are also open panels on the walls, which show a jumble of wires and lots of electronics that look so enhanced that just staring at them causes him a headache.

"Wh-where are we going?" He curiously turns to Wells. "This area is s-still under c-construction."

"It is," agrees the other man with a secretive little smirk, "We are as good as there, though."

It is just then that they reach another door, round in shape this time, and Barry watches Wells repeats the procedure from before to open it. There is a soft hiss as it slides open to reveal another corridor, much shorter than the two before with a set of stairs at the end that lead down to another door, one that seems identical to the last one.

"You w-won't get in trouble for b-bringing me down here, right?" asks Barry as he realizes that he probably is not supposed to be anywhere close to here.

Dr. Wells chuckles as he enters a string of numbers in the field on the display and glances briefly at him. "Mr. Allen, I am the head of S.T.A.R. labs, and while I intend for this little excursion to stay between us, I can assure you that you don't have to worry about me or yourself should someone learn about it nonetheless."

Before Barry can think of something to say, Wells selects one last field on the display and then the door in front of them slides open.

"Come, Mr. Allen." The other man turns to him with an expression that looks both proud and content. "Let me show you the future."

Barry hesitates for a moment, not sure why, but there is a whisper in the back of his mind teling him that he should be careful.

Wells watches him patiently and it somehow helps Barry to ignore whatever is telling him to stay alert and move already. It is probably just a remnant of how upset he has gotten before and he doesn't want to miss out on whatever he is going to see now. He knows that it will be well worth the risk.

And it is.

The area that opens up in front of Barry is huge. It doesn't look like anything he has ever seen before other than in movies or games. The width alone of the seemingly circular tunnel is enormous and it runs so far back on either side of them that he can hardly make out where it ends in a curve. It is just… _gigantic_, and he has difficulty believing that people were able to build this all. It looked other-worldly.

Wells nods when Barry turns to him with wide and uncertain eyes after he has noticed the bridge that leads from where he stands to the other side of the tunnel. "Go on and take a look."

The sound of his shoes on the metal pedestal echoes ominously around him and the feeling of being ridiculously small overcomes him just a few feet towards the middle. He stops and hesitantly walks to the handrail to peer over it. That would be quite a drop…

Barry steps back and turns back to Wells, who has by now caught up with him and is standing close by. It is obvious that he has been careful to leave enough space between them, contrary to before, so that it wouldn't make him uncomfortable again. Barry gives him a grateful look, because it is a very mindful thing to do, and he knows that he shouldn't be surprised but still…

He returns his attention back to the tunnel and he slowly moves towards the middle of the bridge. The air doesn't taste bad but is a bit stale, likely due to the ventilation system not being fully functional yet, should they even bother with it as Barry is pretty sure that he knows what this strange place really is.

"The p-particle accelerator," he says softly under his breath, but it still seems loud due to how quiet it is down here. It is like an absolute lack of noise apart for the both of them, and in a way it is quite eerie.

"Yes." Dr. Wells steps up next to him and leans onto the handrail. "Quite an eye-opener, isn't it?"

Barry gives him a surprised look and isn't sure whether the man has just made a Lord of the Rings reference or not. The amused glint in his eyes makes him believe that he probably did, which is, quite honestly, pretty funny because he would not have expected that Dr Harrison Wells would have the time to watch movies…

"It is," he agrees and turns back to the wide dark grey space in front of him. "I th-thought you were s-supposed to have s-started with it not even two m-month ago." He looks back to Wells curiously. "There is n-no way that you've b-built all of this in j-just a couple of m-months, right?"

"No," Wells seems amused by the sole indication that this could be possible and chuckles. "Even with how far the current technology is, we've still needed about four years to get to this point." "Four years?"

It is a bit mind-boggling to think that this has already going on for four years and that S.T.A.R. labs has been able to keep it a secret. These days, it seems nearly unbelievable with how easily nearly everything could be leaked either onto the internet or the news.

"People are always interested in what can bring them more money." Wells is watching him again with that pleased expression Barry doesn't completely understand. "They will provide you with a lot, whether it be money or a shield form the public eye, as long as you promise them profit in return."

"Th-this is supposed to help people, though," Barry points out and feels stupid as soon as the words leave his mouth. He must appear incredibly naïve.

"It will," agrees Wells and sounds utterly like he means it. The way he looks at him, his eyes nearly sparkling with an energy of someone who has great things planned for the future and has a hard time to wait for it to come, make Barry feel oddly mesmerized.

It is then that he realizes that Dr. Wells has taken his glasses off, and Barry can't help but think that he looks very handsome without them on.

"We will bring Central City to the future, Mr. Allen." Wells eyes appear sharper than just a moment ago as he speaks. "We will create a future that will be worth living in."

Barry realizes that he has just been staring at the other man when Dr. Wells cracks an amused smile. Barry's face grows hot with embarrassment and he turns to look back at the wide, dim space before them.

"Y-you c-can call me Barry," he says quietly, but doesn't worry that his words could be lost in the seemingly omnipresent silence. "_'Mr. Allen'_ m-makes me feel old." It is a lame joke, but he is nervous and he isn't known for his expertise in comedy.

Hesitantly, Barry glances to Wells, curious and a bit worried how his offer would be taken. The intense greyish blue eyes that meet his cause a slight shudder to run down his spine and they suddenly seem much closer than just a second ago.

Wells keeps watching him for another long moment with such focus that is nearly unsettling. Barry wonders what he is thinking and whether he has just made a mistake…

"You d-don't have t-to of course-"

"No," Wells cuts him off, his voice firm but not unkindly so. "I would like to."

A smile starts to spread over the other man's lips, small and soft, causing a tingling sensation in Barry's stomach. He would never say so out loud, but it really feels a bit like butterflies beat their wings in there and it makes him feel restless, nervous, and happy at once.

"I would like to very much, Barry," repeats Wells before an amused glint returns in his eyes and he adds. "And _'Dr. Wells' _makes me feel ancient. Harrison will do."

For a split-second, something close to anger seems to flash over Dr. Wells' face, but it is gone too soon for Barry to be sure whether it had been really there at all. Barry brushes it off as a trick of light.

"Harrison," Barry agrees with a nod. The sound of this name is a bit odd but not something he couldn't get used to, he decides. He ducks his head a bit and touches his neck in a familiar nervous gesture as he glances at his current companion. "Thank you f-for today. I've really enjoyed it."

It is then that the other man looks at him like he is the most precious thing in the world.

"It has been my pleasure, Barry."


	15. Date Night Part I

"I don't understand why you would even bother wearing anything at all." Lisa waggles her eyebrows at him and Barry snorts, giving her an exasperated but also quite fond look over his shoulder from where he is currently standing in front of his bedroom mirror.

"I am p-pretty sure neither Harrison n-nor the other patrons of the restaur-rant would appreciate that very m-much," he points out and turns back to his reflection to proceed studying the fifth shirt he has put on in about just as many minutes. A familiar frown forms on his forehead. Lisa, who must have seen it from her spot on his bed, groans in frustration.

"Stop, Barry, please! How the hell are you a guy? You are even worse than me," she huffs and rolls onto her back to cross her arms in front of her chest. "Forget it, I am not even nearly this bad."

"Liar." Barry's lips crack into a slight smile while he studies himself – this shirt makes him look like a sickly pale vampire. "You n-needed like two hours t-to get ready for your h-hush-hush date w-with Roscoe last week."

"Yes, because I have hairs that are literally as long as my damn arm. Try to get finished with that in under one hour and after that we can talk." Lisa rolls back onto her stomach and gives him a critical once over. "And stop fretting, you look good already. Well, as good as you can look anyway."

"Thanks," Barry shoots her a fake glare and she sticks her tongue out in reply.

They have been at this for about an hour now – him having a small and very quiet nervous melt-down with Lisa keeping him company. He adored her a bit for it because her relaxed demeanour helped him to not completely lose his nerves and consider the possibility of just hiding away in his room.

It probably would not be a very effective plan either with Lisa around because she would not hesitate to use force to get him to the door as soon as Harrison turned up in about another hour.

Why did he agree to this again? He doesn't _do_ dating; he is not made for this. It will only turn into another embarrassing fiasco, exactly as it had the other two times Iris set him up with someone.

"Barry, you know that man already, so stop freaking out." Lisa meets his surprised look with a serious one before she smirks. "He also knows you and he's still asked you out. This probably doesn't say much about his taste in men, but take it as the good sign it's supposed to be."

Barry rolls his eyes and turns back to the mirror. "I look p-pale in this one." "You look pale in each and every one of your shirts. You are pale, it's your complexion. Stop making such a big deal out of it all of a sudden," she huffs as she moves over to the edge of the bed to get up. She proceeds over to his closet and starts looking through it with a critical expression. It seems that she has finally had enough of just being an observer.

"I don't get why you are getting so worked up over this. You knew this day would come after your knight in white armour confessed his feeling for you." Lisa picks a couple of shirts and carries them over to him. She shoves them against his chest before walking back to the bed. "The crazy scientist of yours has been ridiculously patient with you. He's certainly not suddenly going to decide that he's better off without you because of a stupid shirt."

Barry wants to point out that she can't know that but it only would lead to another discussion about his self-esteem – or, in Lisa's opinion, lack thereof – and he really doesn't want any of this right now. Thus, he takes a look at the shirts she has picked out for him and considers which one he should try on.

When the doorbell rings Barry freezes completely before turning wide and horrified eyes on his friend. He more than happy to lock himself into his closet if it turns out that he has somehow gotten the time wrong and this is Harrison.

"Calm down," Lisa snorts, not needing to hear a word from him to understand what he is so worried about. "You still have nearly an hour to break your pretty head over what to wear. I highly doubt that you would mess up something like the time of your first date with Mr Charming."

"I-I c-could h-have m-messed it up," mumbles Barry, more to himself than to her. He's starting to feel kind of sick.

"For fuck's sake, you are the worst non-teenage girl I know…" His friend rises up from her perch on the bed and tells him to stay put before going to see who has turned up at his front door.

Barry listens intently to Lisa walking through his flat and opening the door. He can nearly taste his nervousness when only silence follows for a long moment. Then, Lisa groans in annoyance and a wave of relief overcomes him as Iris tells her in a very sarcastic tone that she is also happy to see her.

"What the hell are you doing here, West?"

"What do you think?"

"You know about his date?"

"Of course I know about his date."

As he listens to them, Barry notices the death grip he has on the couple of shirts Lisa handed him before and forces himself to relax. He has no idea why Iris is here. He thought she had to study for an exam tonight but he's certainly not going to complain. "I'm just here for moral support and to help him pick something out to wear. You know that he has next to no sense when it comes to fashion." Iris sounds slightly miffed as she says so and Barry is certain that Lisa is currently glaring daggers at her for turning up here at all.

"So am I and you know what they say about too many cooks and spoiling the food, don't you?"

Both women enter his bedroom and the air between them is as chilly as usual. Barry feels a slight and very familiar tinge of annoyance rise up in his chest, but it dissipates as soon as Iris turns to him and gives him a concerned once over.

"You look so distraught, I'm worried you are going to jump out the window any moment now," she tells him, frowning, before walking over to him and giving him a quick hug. "There is no reason for you to be so nervous, Bear."

"Sorry, I am n-not good at this." Barry gives her an apologetic smile and rubs his neck in embarrassment because he knows that he is making too much of a big deal out of this anyway. "It's j-just the nerves."

"I know," Iris gives him a sympathetic smile and squeezes his arm affectionately before her gaze drops down to the clothes in his hands. She frowns again and glances briefly over at Lisa, who doesn't miss her wary expression and immediately glares at her in return.

"I thought you're going to a karaoke bar?" Iris asks, holding the other woman's gaze for a second before turning back to Barry. "Maybe you want to pick something less… _depressing_?"

"What the hell?" Lisa hisses, stepping forward to defend herself. "These are _his_ favourite shirts, you—"

"Lisa," Barry gives her a warning look. The blond woman glances darkly at him before crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"You know him! He is a fucking emo at heart, so why not let him put something on that he actually feels comfortable in?" Lisa asks. It's hard to miss that it annoys her to no end that her choice of clothes have been criticized.

"Because he looks really pale in it and about five years younger?"

Barry frowns and turns to the mirror so that he could take a critical look at himself. The shirt he is currently wearing is a very dark blue, and he tries to figure out whether or not it actually makes him look like he is still in his teens. The notion is pretty unsettling…

"I d-don't look like—"

"He has a pale complexion," Lisa huffs, nodding her head at him without breaking eye contact to Iris. "He always looks pale, so why make a big deal out of it?"

"I'm not, but it is their first date and he probably wants to look his best," Iris argues. "Why even a t-shirt? He could wear the blue button-down and—"

"Oh, _seriously_? It's light blue and totally makes him look like such a mama's boy.

You _do_ want him to get somewhere tonight, don't you?"

"It does _not_ and you are being ridiculous."

"I am the one who is actually trying to help him here and not turn him into my own life-size Barbie doll to dress up."

"I do _not_ do that. I am trying to help him just like you."

From experience, Barry knows that they will likely be at this for a while, and he is pretty sure that he could leave the room without either of them noticing. He therefore decides to get himself a root beer to help his stomach to settle while he waits for the storm to pass.

"Why don't we paint his nails while we are at it?" Lisa sneers.

"I have no idea why you always have to make everything so damn difficult. This is certainly not helping him."

"Dressing him in this ugly blue button-down is what won't help him."

"I got him this ugly blue button-down!"

"_Exactly_!"

Maybe it would have been better if he hadn't said anything to anybody. He could have just worn his working attire – it's not a real eye catcher, per say, but Harrison seems to like it well enough.

At least, this way he wouldn't have to witness another hissy fit between his two best friends in the middle of his bedroom.

Sighing quietly to himself, Barry out into the hall and makes his way over to the kitchen.

Neither of the two women notice as he leaves.

Barry looks at the restroom mirror and decides that he does look like a damn teenager in the dark button-down shirt Lisa and Iris finally agreed upon about two minutes before Harrison turned up on his doorstep. He never realized before that dark colours had this kind of effect on him. Why hadn't anyone pointed that out to him?

God, he's really glad that he usually prefers to wear lighter colours to work, otherwise his co-workers would take him even less seriously…

He groans and splashes another handful of cool water onto his face while he half listens through the bathroom door to the awful sounding guy currently on stage trying his luck at "I love Rock&amp;Roll".

This is bad. _All_ of this is really bad… why did he suggest a damn karaoke bar to begin with?! He doesn't even _like_ karaoke, he just sings it whenever Iris takes him out with her and more or less forces him to get on stage.

Harrison hadn't looked all that thrilled from the moment they entered this location. He hasn't said anything since and has in fact assured him that everything was fine, but Barry isn't stupid.

After a month of pretending that Harrison hadn't anything said to him regarding his feelings for him and being generally a total arse about it by evading Harrison most of the time, Barry finally found the courage to ask the other man whether he wanted to get out, and – of course – Barry started to freak out as soon as he had done so. When Harrison asked him whether he already had a place in mind, he just blurted out the first thing he could think of, which was a karaoke night bar because Iris has been pestering him about doing one again for days before then.

"Great," he mutters quietly and presses his forehead a bit harder onto his crossed hands where they are resting on the cool restroom sink. "Y-you, B-Barry Allen, should r-receive an aw-ward for p-picking the worst locations you c-could have a first date."

His train of thoughts is cut off when the door opens and two guys walk him, causing him to quickly jump up and meet their surprised and slightly curious gazes with an embarrassed one. He swiftly makes his way past them back outside where the song is ending.

The air is filled with applause and cheering as he slowly makes his way over to where their table is.

Harrison is reading something on his smart phone, frowning slightly in concentration, but looks up as soon as he notices Barry approaching.

"S-sorry f-for taking so l-long," he apologizes awkwardly as he takes his seat, noticing with a sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach that the other man hasn't really touched much of his food so far either. They both settled on cheeseburgers with fries and onion rings but both of their plates have hardly lost any of their content so far.

"You've missed quite an interesting display of vocal talent," Harrison chuckles and glances over to the stage where the balding little guy, who has to be in his mid-forties, is currently bowing to the still cheering crowd.

"No, b-believe me, I've h-heard him all the way f-from the r-restroom," Barry gives him a nervous smile before he picks up one of the fries and starts to eat it slowly. His stomach still feels very queasy but he doesn't like the idea of wasting the food or both of them just sitting awkwardly in front of their meals letting it grow cold.

"He's gotten quite into it," Harrison agrees and picks up one of his own fries. "Do you want to try your luck as well?"

"S-singing?" Barry asks and immediately feels really stupid again because what else could he mean in a karaoke bar? He averts his eyes and shakes his head. "N-no, I'm n-not any good at it."

The other man is watching him. Barry can feel his gaze and he can't help but start to fidget a bit.

"Barry, I get the feeling that you don't like karaoke bars all that much," Harrison doesn't sound accusing, but rather more curious.

"I d-do," Barry protests weakly, still staring down at the hardly touched plate of food.

The cheering around them has finally died down and he can't help but think that this audience is either ridiculously easy to please or they are all buzzed enough to no longer care what they are listening to – he figures it's more likely the latter.

"You don't look like you are enjoying yourself," Harrison states outright, and he seems to hesitate for a moment before he goes on, more quietly than before, "And I'm not sure whether it is due to the place we are currently at or if it's due to my presence."

Barry's head snaps back up in alarm.

"What?! No, it's n-not b-because of you," he assures him quickly, and the sheer urge to hit something in frustration is nearly smothering because he really should not be this bad at this. "I… you are r-right, I d-don't l-like k-karaoke bars th-that much.

They…"

He shrugs and nervously bites his lower lip as he tries to think of what to say. "I am not r-really a f-fan of c-crowded p-places."

Other than when joining Iris or Lisa and their respective friends on one of their nights out, he hardly ever really 'mingles' with other people when he doesn't have to.

"You suggested this bar," Harrison reminds him, but again it is just a statement. When Barry glances unhappily at him, he actually can make out that the other man looks somewhat amused.

"I p-panicked when you asked m-me whether I alr-ready had a p-place in mind," he admits reluctantly. "I s-said the f-first thing that c-came to me."

"A karaoke bar?" Harrison chuckles, leaning back into his chair as he studies Barry with a surprisingly fond look of exasperation. "You are a curious man, Mr. Allen."

"I-Iris likes to v-visit this place," Barry explains and out of the corner of his eyes he notices that three of the other patrons are currently making their way over to the stage, all of them in their late teens. "It isn't s-so b-bad b-but it's not r-really my thing."

"What is your thing, then?"

Staying at home, getting a cup of tea, and reading? Yeah, that doesn't make him, someone in his early twenties, sound odd at all...

Barry likes other people well enough, and has no real trouble being around them, but he still usually prefers his own company more often than not. It drives both Lisa and Iris nuts and he always feels a bit guilty about it.

The melody of "Sweet Child o' Mine" starts to play and Barry glances over at the stage where the teenager are currently joking around, each with a microphone in hand, while looking at the monitor that displays the text.

"What do you think of paying for the food and leaving for someplace less crowded?" Harrison asks, and Barry turns back to him both surprised and slightly hopeful because this sounds like a damn marvellous idea.

"W-we haven't finished our f-food," he points out, though, because it is true and he would feel bad about letting it go to waste.

"We can ask them whether they can wrap it up for us." The other man watches Barry with this amused fondness again that makes something in deep in his belly warm up.

It is tempting to just agree. It really is and Barry wants to but… he feels bad for how their evening has worked out so far and he doesn't want him to stick around just because he feels obligated to.

"W-we c-can leave it at th-that i-if you w-want," he says quietly and somewhat hopes that his voice has been absorbed by the starting music because he regrets the words as soon as they have left his mouth.

Judging by Harrison's frown and the concerned and slightly upset way he is watching him now, his suggestion seems to have reached its target though. Barry knows he has just put his foot into his mouth again, of course he has, because if there is one talent he possesses, then it is this – making a complete arse out of himself.

"I m-mean, only i-if you w-want t-to," he adds nervously and has to looks down at his plate because meeting the other man's eyes has become next to impossible now. "I j-just w-want you t-to know th-that you don't have t-to f-feel l-like you h-have t-to… s-stay b-because o-of m-me i-if… i-if y-you d-don-"

"Barry," Harrison's voice is firm and is easily heard over the music in the background despite him hardly rising it. There is a note of exasperation to it that quickly dissipates when he goes on in a softer and warmer tone, "I don't want to leave it at that, and I don't feel like I have to stay because of some sense of obligation towards you. I want to enjoy this evening with you, and if you don't feel comfortable here, we will just find someplace else to stay."

He chuckles and takes his glasses off, which causes Barry to glance up again because he really likes how Harrison looks without them. Their eyes meet and he goes on. "I have been looking forward to tonight and if it means I have to sit through bad karaoke or to look for somewhere else to spend the rest of our date, so be it."

A familiar heat creeps up his neck and cheeks and Barry can't bring himself to look away from those blue eyes. Something is taut in his chest. There is a tingling sensation in his stomach he isn't sure how to place but it probably comes close to what the flapping of butterfly wings have to feel like.

Harrison's eyes are warm and the world around the two of them fades away when he smiles at Barry in that slightly embarrassed but not apologetic way as he goes on. "I won't complain as long as you are at my side."

… and that is that.


	16. Date Night Part II

The soft rushing sound of the waves fills the cool night around them. The temperatures are still warm enough for how late it is, and while both of them are wearing their jackets, neither seems in any hurry to leave anytime soon.

Eobard listens to Barry telling him something about how certain kinds of marine creatures need the shine of the full moon for reproduction or orientation during travelling. Nothing of this is new or particularly interesting to him, and he hardly pays attention to the actual words. Even so, it is still nice to hear Barry's voice, especially with how relaxed and even it sounds for once.

Barry is uses his hands a lot while talking; Eobard has picked up on this a long time ago – each and every version of Barry has done so, so far. It is quite charming and nostalgic in an odd way.

The moon is bright tonight and hangs full and heavy over their heads as it's reflection glimmers in the water before them – it is nearly a ridiculously romantic setting and Eobard is sure that it pleases the younger man next to him despite how obviously nervous he has initially been about a late night trip to the river. The shine of the celestial body is strong enough that they don't need any other light source and it gives Barry's already pale skin a soft glow.

Eobard can't help but watch him, study every single one of his movements, and feel in awe of finally having him here, so close that he could reach for him and let his fingers ghost over the crook of his neck, up to his jaw…

They are currently at a stage he hasn't dared to reach for at least another year if not longer as he has sworn to himself to be more careful, more patient this time around. Barry keeps glancing at him. His flush intensifies every time their eyes briefly meet, before he quickly turns back to the sea. He doesn't seem bothered by his attention, though, which is a good sign, and Eobard allows himself to indulge in his little observation a bit longer.

Eobard notices again how close Barry sits and licks his lips as the desire to reach for him wells up in his chest one more, stronger than before, and it is so damn hard not to reach out for him.

There is still enough space between them that they are not touching, but it is still close enough that he can feel Barry's presence next to him. He thinks of how Barry would react should he lean a bit towards him – maybe to point something out on the other side of the beach – enough for their shoulders to brush. His gaze moves back to the line of that exquisite neck, the pale skin that nearly seems to shine in the moonlight, and he wants to taste it so badly.

The memory of how it felt under his fingertips – his lips, his tongue – once before comes to his mind and he has to adjust his legs because a white-hot burning arousal shoots straight to his loins. It is uncomfortable and annoying and he quickly shoves these thoughts away as none of them are really pleasant when they linger for too long. They don't just hold attraction and desire but also the knowledge of his past failures – of the other man under him, looking at him with fear, hatred, and betrayal in his eyes, like he is an abhorrent creature, a manifestation of his nightmares.

Eobard knows himself, he knows how easily he can lose control if he is not careful and he doesn't need to be reminded of this. He would not let it come to that again. He would made it right this time.

"Everything alright?" Barry, who has been leaning back onto his hands, sits up and studies him with a slightly worried gaze. It is then that Eobard notices how tense he himself has gotten and the deep frown he is currently wearing on his face.

He forces himself to relax and smile. "Yes, I've just remembered something I still need to take care of."

Barry looks unconvinced and lowers his gaze to the blanket between them for a moment before he meets his again. "I am s-sorry if I b-bore you, I kn-know th-that I can g-get c-carried wh-when I t-talk about things I f-find inter-resting."

It is curious, thinks Eobard, how every Barry Allen, who has come after the initial one, is so very prone to insecurities. The first one wasn't like this. At least, he didn't appear like it. He had a calm sense of self-confidence that Eobard hasn't found again in any of his alterations. Odd, how tragedy can change a person so much…

"You don't," he reassures Barry and, again, he feels the need to touch him. Take his hand and…

Eobard nearly chuckles when he realizes that he actually can do this. While he can't do much just yet, he can do this little display of affection, indulge in it like any other couple would. Slowly, as to give Barry time in case he should want to pull back – and he isn't sure how he would take it if he really would – he reaches for his hand and takes hold of it.

Even in the faint light of the moon it is hard to miss how the other man starts to blush furiously in response.

"I like to listen to you," Eobard starts to caress the back of his hand with his thumb and watches how a shudder goes through Barry.

"L-Lisa says I am p-prone t-to b-babbling," Barry laughs nervously. His eyes are on their joined hands, a look of disbelief and worry on his face. "I-I d-don't r-really reallize it m-most of the t-time a-and I t-tend t-to go on and o-on f-for ages. I-Iris ththinks so t-too b-but sh-she d-doesn't adm-mit it b-because sh-she th-thinks…" The younger man breaks off, glances at him in embarrassment and grimaces.

"I am d-doing it ag-gain…"

Eobard smiles and gives Barry's hand a slight squeeze.

"As I've said before, I like listening to you, Barry, and I don't mind if you go a little overboard telling me about what you are interested in. I want to know these kinds of things about you."

There is probably hardly a thing Eobard doesn't already know about Barry. He knows his favourite movies, what way he likes his tea the best, how he insists on not liking coffee but still steals a cup every day at work when nobody is looking. How he always picks the green sweater to wear he got from Snart a couple of years ago whenever he is feeling down and withdraws because he doesn't want to bother anybody with it. How he meets more often with Lisa than Iris but has probably come closer to tell the later one about his abuse. How he likes to bite his fingernails off instead of cutting them or how he is getting annoyed to no end that his hair never seems to do what he wants – no matter how much gel he puts in it.

There are so many things, small ones and big ones, important and not, and he has collected them over the years. He hoards them like a treasure and it is hard to not let Barry know – to not tell him that he already knows him better than anybody else there is in this universe.

"I want to get to know you," Eobard goes on and meets Barry's eyes firmly. "You are an incredible young man and you don't have to apologize for who you are." Barry's flush intensifies and he ducks his head, looking both a bit embarrassed but also pleased. After a brief moment, he glances up to Eobard again and gives him a still somewhat uncertain but grateful smile. "I w-would like that t-too. G-getting to knknow you, I mean."

Eobard nearly pulls him closer, close enough to taste those full soft lips that look just delicious, but he stomps down on the urge and instead gives Barry's hand a slight squeeze. "I think that can be arranged."

It seems that it has been the right decision to cut the younger man off his initial support system at such a young age. Eobard tried this one before but he is a methodical person and usually proceeds in small steps, careful to be aware of any consequences his alterations of Barry's life lead to.

After his last failed attempt, though, he had been nearly blind with anger and frustration and went further back than he had initially planned to. It had worried him at first after he took care of Nora and Henry Allen but it seems that it was the right thing to do, after all. Without a stable home and someone to guide him through childhood and early teenage years, a very essential part of who Barry Allen is has been altered and seemingly just as Eobard had hoped for.

Abuse is a powerful psychological weapon and used in the right way it could mold a person's mind nearly better and easier than anything else. Finding out what degree of physical and mental abuse is necessary to get Barry to where Eobard wants him to be had been a long and arduous endeavour, though, and he still isn't sure whether he really made all the right decisions. While it does look like everything has just worked out like he had planned it to, he knows better than to lull himself in a false sense of security. He knows all too well how one miscalculation can let everything go to hell.

Positioning himself as someone to whom the young boy and later man could look up to hasn't been difficult, though, and a science program for the underprivileged in Barry's Junior High that had been sponsored by the then just founded S.T.A.R. labs assured that the boy's interests developed in the right direction.

Surprisingly enough, the part that turned out to be a problem this time around – something he hadn't expected – was to get the younger man to join the police as a forensic scientist. Despite the headache that caused him, it still amuses Eobard a bit how unwilling Barry initially seemed about choosing this line of work. He knows that Barry would still have been willing to become the Flash even if he didn't joined the police – he has seen this happen before – but he also knows all too well how important it is to not change this part of the younger man's life and what consequences it can have.

As with a house of cards, there are certain parts you can remove with enough care and others that can't be touched or the rest of it would collapse.

Trial and error, it always comes back to this.

… and Eobard really has had enough of it. He is a scientist at heart, he loves to examine, to do his research, but he is fed up with getting nowhere when it comes to Barry and how he had to live through one disappointment after another. This is not going to be another one of his failed attempts. He wouldn'tt let it.

Eobard forcefully steers his mind back to the here and now and the other man, who has averted his gaze to look over to the water again and also seems deep in his own thoughts.

This man is the most beautiful and desirable being he has ever met… it took him far too long to realize how perfect he was, how perfect for him.

"You n-never asked m-me about wh-what I m-meant when I t-told you…" Barry's voice is quiet, so much so that Eobard has to listen carefully despite how quiet it is around them. The younger man keeps his gaze on the wide open water and there is suddenly a tension to him that hadn't been there a moment ago. He looks worried and afraid, and Eobard already knows what he is talking about. A slight rush of delight overcomes him.

Trust is essential for this to work out and what Barry is about to tell him is a clear sign that he really considers him trustworthy…

Eobard's quiet joy over this quickly dims again when a by now very familiar guilt starts to join him as well because, despite his goal and knowing that he is doing it for them in the end, he doesn't enjoy inflicting pain on the other man. Being gleeful over him opening up about this is just… wrong.

He schools his features in a calm attentive expression and considers him with a slightly worried frown, just in case Barry should decide to glance at him. He doesn't urge him to go on as he knows how important it is to give the younger man time for this and, really, after all those years, what are a couple more seconds, anyway?

Barry bites his lower lip and pulls his hand out from Eobard's grasp tentatively. He keeps his eyes in front of him though, and there is a nervousness to how he is holding himself right then that makes it obvious that he is not at all sure whether he should proceed or not.

A long moment passes between them in silence before Barry finally glances at him briefly, with a guilty look in his eyes, and the guilt hits Eobard again like a punch. It suddenly becomes difficult to meet that sad and pained gaze.

"I h-had… I-I w-was… ab-bused," Barry tells him, again so very quietly. "I… I know th-that y-you p-probab-bly d-don't w-want t-to hear th-that b-but… I… I th-think yyou sh-should kn-know b-bef-fore…"

The younger man shrugs helplessly with one shoulder and looks back down at the blanket between them.

The quietness of their surrounding suddenly seems much more oppressive than pleasant as Eobard waits for him to go on. He knows how important it is not to press Barry but at the same time he really doesn't want to either. He forced himself to watch anything that was done to him, any physical, mental, and sexual abuse but he… he still doesn't like to think about it, at all.

"It w-wouldn't be f-fair t-to y-you i-if I d-didn't t-tell y-you," Barry pauses again and grimaces like he is under pain, all the while rubbing his hands nervously over his thighs. He isn't looking at Eobard as goes on, even quieter than before so that his voice is nothing more than a whisper. "I-it m-messed me u-up, r-really b-badly, aand… I d-don't know w-whether I can… b-be n-normal… l-like others…"

Barry looks pale, paler than before, worryingly so, and again shrugs helplessly with a slightly frustrated expression on his face, still unwilling to look at him.

"I don't w-want y-you to th-think… I d-don't w-want you to b-be disap-pointed..." he breaks off, his voice gives out and the pale, nearly white skin is flooded by an intense crimson as shame overtakes him. He can't bring himself to turn to Eobard and it is painful to watch.

Slowly, as not to startle the younger man, Eobard reaches out, but halts for a second when Barry notices his approaching hand, tensing up in a mixture of apprehension and confusion.

"It's alright," Eobard assures him quietly before he takes hold of his wrist very loosely and meets the wide frightened eyes firmly, "I won't hurt you, Barry. I promise you."

A small voice in the back of his mind calls him a liar then but Eobard ignores it – he would not let anybody or anything hurt him again, himself included, not as long as he lived; not as long as Barry is his. It has become more and more obvious that it is not necessary to inflict the younger man with any more pain, and it is such a damn relief because he doesn't want to. He never wanted to.

"I am very truly sorry that this happened to you. You shouldn't… nobody should have to go through such a thing, and I really don't want you to worry about disappointing me. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable but I had my suspicions and I went into this with that in mind." Eobard stops when he notices how the flush on Barry's cheeks has intensified, the red starting to creep up his neck as well – he looks utterly embarrassed and horrified.

"I don't think any less of you because of it," he says firmly, not willing to let the other man retreat from him, "And I would never expect anything from you that makes you uncomfortable. I am not just interested in you because of your body, Barry, but because I am looking for a companion, someone I can share my time and my thoughts with. Someone I can trust and treasure for who they are and not just to get some physical relief."

Barry relaxes a bit, he can see and feel it, and it takes some of the edge off the sudden panic that has come over Eobard. Lightly, so very lightly, he squeezes Barry's wrist and gives him a small but honest smile.

"I want you to always remember the following two things," he states quietly but firmly," I will never ask anything of you that you are not willing to give, and you will never disappoint me as long as you are honest with me, Barry."

A number of emotions cross the younger man's face at that, some too quickly for Eobard to grasp, but the ones he does pick up on let him know that he has said the right thing. It happened before, him being at the receiving end of such honest gratitude and being the source of hope and joy in those intensely blue – once brown, once green, once grey – eyes but it feels different this time around, more like an accomplishment and far more satisfying.

More reassuringly…

"Th-thank you," utters Barry and chuckles nervously when a couple of tears start to run down his still flushed cheeks. He wipes them away and turns back to the river, looking much more relaxed than he has the whole night so far.

"Thank you," he repeats more quietly, and Eobard is pleased when he can feel Barry's hand move under his so that he can take hold of it lightly again.

Eobard watches this wonderful young man next to him, feeling a bit like he is smothered by the love he feels for him in this moment.

Barry turns to him again, and while he doesn't seem surprised about finding his eyes on him, he still is a bit shy when he returns it with a tentative smile.

It is going to work out this time. It is going to work just as planned.

Eobard starts to caress the back of Barry's hand with his thumb and just enjoys the pleasant feeling that fills him as they watch each other in a comfortable silence.

There will be no other failures.

He just knows it.


	17. The Importance of Understanding

Barry is sitting on his couch, a thick blanket tugged around his shoulders and a mug of hot chocolate in one hand, a crime novel in the other. The heater of the apartment complex has stopped working two days ago and while the landlord assured the tenants that it would be fixed in no time, his flat is still feeling about as warm as his fridge.

Still, he is not going to let this ruin his evening as he intends to just enjoy this rare moment of peace, listening to the patter of rain hitting against his living room window and finally finishing the crime novel he has started over a month ago. After how busy work has been for the entirety of the last two weeks, he thinks he has earned himself some time to relax.

He takes a sip of his mug, enjoying the warmth and sweetness of his late night drink, and glances at the digital clock of his blue-ray player. It is already close to elven and a comfortable tiredness has started to settle over him.

The notion of moving to his bedroom is cut short by the sound of his phone vibrating briefly on the coffee table in front of him. A pleasant anticipation spreads through his chest as he is pretty sure that he knows who has just texted him.

As expected, when he opens the messenger app, he finds a new message from Harrison.

A smiles spreads across his lips as a comfortable warmth fills him and he leans back to see how the other man is doing. The date for the start of the particle accelerator is creeping closer and, while it is still months away, things have become really busy at S.T.A.R. labs due to it.

"_What do you think of taking a holiday? Maybe somewhere in the Caribbean? I _

_need to get away from this insanity or I will have kittens!" _

Barry chuckles, smile growing even wider as he takes another sip of his cup of hot chocolate before he answers:

"_**Are the other scientist mean to you again?" :( **_

"_They are incompetent oafs who make _

_me want to tug my hairs all day long. _

_And stop being a smart-ass." _

"_**Even Caitlin and Hartley? And I'm not. **_

_**I am a caring and sympathetic partner. ;3" **__"There are exceptions to the rule – although Hartley doesn't help with his attitude towards his colleagues. And you are not – you using my grief as your personal entertainment." _

"_**Hartley is Hartley, don't think he will ever change. :o/ **_

_**I don't! X( I am feeling sympathetic towards you right now, I am like the nicest person there is. You can ask anybody, they all know that! You should appreciate me much more, you know? -.-" **_

Barry sends the text, feeling so stupidly happy that he is sure Lisa would make fun of him again if she were around. She enjoys him having a boyfriend nearly more than he does – though Barry doesn't really know whether this is really a fitting description for the relationship Harrison and he have as they haven't even kissed yet. Besides that, he is also pretty sure the other man wouldn't think too highly of this term.

He hesitates for a second before he sends another short text.

"_**I miss you." **_

His face grows hot and a familiar insecurity starts to nag at the back of his mind again, telling him that he is too clingy and that Harrison would be annoyed. It's stupid. The rational part of him knows that his worries are likely for naught, but it is still difficult for him to believe that someone like Harrison Wells would really be interested in him.

A knock to his door startles him out of his thoughts and he turns to his entrance door with a slight frown, not sure who would turn up at his doorstep this late at night.

Glancing at his phone display, he sees that Harrison hasn't replied yet – which causes a slight worry to stir in his belly – so the he places it back on the coffee table and gets up.

It is quite a surprise when he spots Len through his spyhole, which causes a by-now familiar unease to settle over him as he hesitates fir a moment before opening the door.

"Hey," the other man greets with a faint smile and lifts his right hand, showing Barry a six-pack. "I was hoping you aren't busy and wouldn't mind some company." This is not at all what Barry expected.

The last three months he has hardly seen anything of the other man. Len had already made it quite obvious what he thought of Barry actually starting something with Harrison, and while he has never outright spoken against it, his continuous absence has made his feelings regarding the matter more than clear.

Barry knows that he should be angry and upset that Len pulled this complete jackass and childish move on him. There was no reason for his friend to behave like this, even if he didn't like Harrison. He has made a total arse out of himself, leaving Barry behind feeling confused and hurt and just miserable.

Even Lisa keeps bringing up some elaborate revenge schemes against her brother but Barry is pretty sure that she is mostly doing so to lift his mood and make him smile – for the most part, at least.

The truth is, though, that Barry has missed Len – a lot.

Like Lisa, Len is family. Even if they were not real blood-relatives, they have still stuck together for a very long time by now. History like that isn't wiped away by hurt feelings.

"Sure," Barry agrees quietly and steps aside to let the other man in.

It is reassuring when he notices how Len seems to relax at that, which means that Barry isn't the only one who feels a bit uncomfortable right now. His friend has the talent of making it seem like he is always in control of any given situation and that nothing could faze him. Barry knows of course that this isn't true but Len is quite good at making people believe.

They both sit down on the couch, though Barry keeps more of a distance between them than usual. He knows that Len notices – nearly nothing goes past this man – but he doesn't comment on it, for which he is grateful.

"Th-thanks," Barry accepts the still cool can of beer with a nod and enjoys the brief hissing noise it makes when he opens it. It is bitter and cool and while he isn't really a beer-person, he doesn't outright dislike it like Lisa does either.

He turns towards the coffee table and takes a sip, falling quiet again.

An uncomfortable silence follows for a couple of minutes, neither of them talking as they drink their beers in silence.

This is something Barry was expecting; the uneasiness between them is a common presence when Len and he have an argument. The other man usually is the one to start it and, to his credit, is often also the one who tries to fix things again. The problem is that Len is not really good at apologizing – to anybody – and he often is too proud to outright say that he is or was in the wrong. His stubbornness can probably put a mule to shames in this regard…

"How are you doing?"

Barry, who has been studying the bottle in his hands absentmindedly, looks over to Len at the question and gives him a faint smile.

"I'm f-fine, job's k-keeping me busy b-but aside from th-that it's the s-same old." Len hums and turns back ahead as he takes another sip of his beer.

Barry knows that his friend wants him to touch upon the topic of Harrison and his relationship but something inside him baulks at that notion. He doesn't want this to turn into a fight and he has the uneasy feeling that Len would probably turn this into one should he bring the older man up.

"What is about you and the scientist?" Len looks at him with a slight smirk that does seem a bit forced. "Lisa told me that you two have been together for three months by now."

This is definitely not what Barry has expected Len to ask. He wouldn't have thought that his friend would want to touch upon this topic with the end of a stick, let alone bring this up on his own.

"W-we… well, w-we are… good?" he stammers and feels his cheeks grow hot when the other man arches an eyebrow at him.

"You don't sound entirely certain there," Len points out. Barry turns back to the small table in front of him with a slight frown.

"We are g-good," he says more firmly this time before he takes a sip of his beer. After hesitating for a moment he adds a bit reluctantly. "I'm j-just not sure w-whether we are r-really tog-gether."

Nervously, Barry starts to gnaw at his lower lip before he glances over to Len, who is watching him thoughtfully.

"Does he think you are together?"

Not really sure how to answer, Barry turns back to his bottle and shrugs halfheartedly.

"P-probably… yeah, I th-think so."

He and Harrison have spent a lot of time together over the last couple of months and while they didn't really do a lot of things one usually does when going on a date, due to how busy the other man is, Barry has been over a lot more at S.T.A.R. labs whenever his schedule allowed it.

After their first real date at the beach, Harrison has been quite cautious when it comes to physical contact between them both, though, and while Barry is grateful for it in a way, a small part of him is worried whether this could also be a sign that he is losing interest in him.

"But you doubt it?" It's phrased as a question but Len obviously knows the answer to it already.

Barry shrugs again with an unhappy frown. "I just d-don't get w-why he…"

Doubting himself is a speciality of hsis and he knows that it is one of his more annoying traits, especially to people who know him rather well, like Len. Thus, he breaks off and lets an uncomfortable silence settle between them.

Len doesn't urge him on and Barry doesn't expect him to. In situations like this, the other man can be very patient.

"I… I j-just don't g-get why he w-would… wh-why he is inter-rested in me," Barry goes on and nervously licks his lips as he glances over to Len. "Y-you know how odd

I am-"

"You aren't odder than the rest of us," his friend cuts him off calmly but firmly, and with a slight disapproving frown. "You are remarkably normal for someone who lived through shit like you did, Barry. Stop selling yourself so damn short all the time. I'm pretty sure that most people in your place would either have ended up in the loony bin or as psychopaths."

"N-normal p-people don't f-freak out wh-when th-their partners t-touch th-them," he angrily points out and his grip around the still half full bottle tightens enough that it makes a small protesting noise. Barry forces himself to relax a bit again and takes a deep calming breath, feeling stupid for getting this worked up in front of Len.

"Did he try something?"

Surprised and slightly annoyed, he turns to Len with a frown.

"No, of c-course not. Harrison isn't l-like that."

"I'm not insinuating anything but you do seem rather upset."

"B-because… n-not because of him." Barry huffs in frustration and rubs his forehead as he glares down at his lap. "How l-long do you th-think he w-will s-stay with me bbefore he g-grows b-bored of w-waiting or realizes th-that… th-that I'm…"

He breaks off and feels the urge to pull his knees up to his chest as it is his usual comfort position he falls back to when he is upset. Realizing that Len is the only other person present, he gives in and does so a moment later.

"I d-don't w-want him to l-leave…" he murmurs unhappily.

"Did he say something in this direction?" asks Len and Barry can feel his gaze upon him even without looking.

"No…"

"Did he tell you that he is growing impatient with the amount of physical contact you have right now?"

"…"

Len snorts and takes another sip of his beer.

"So, he thinks you two are in a relationship, he doesn't seem like he intends to break it off anytime soon, and he also hasn't shown any signs that he is bothered by your reluctance to get more intimate..."

"…"

His friend actually heaves a sigh at that before he chuckles and tells Barry that he is an idiot.

"You are worrying yourself sick over nothing again."

"You d-don't kn-know that-"

"Of course I don't know that for sure," grumbles Len and meets his uncertain but somewhat hopeful look with fond exasperation. "I don't know shit about that guy other that he is a scientist and rich, but I know you and your compulsion to overanalyze everything."

"I don't-"

"You do," Len disagrees drily and frowns. "I'm not cut for giving dating advice, Bar, you know that my love-life sways between bad and worse, but you should talk to the guy if you so worried about this."

This is advice Barry has already given himself before – _many_ times before.

The problem is only that he's worried that if Harrison already doesn't think he's a bit odd yet, he'll end up thinking so afterwards.

"You are giving me a headache just by watching you overthinking this," Len remarks with a chuckle. The smirk wanes from his face a moment later and he seems hesitant before he asks in an unusual tentative tone of voice. "Did you tell him about it?" There is absolutely no reason to ask his friend to clarify. Barry knows what he is talking about and like usual when this ugly topic comes up, he feels himself grow hot and tense and slightly sick. He swallows because his throat feels very dry all of a sudden before he replies, gaze fixed upon the wall in front of him.

"N-not everyth-thing… not m-much, r-really, b-but I… I think he's g-got it."

"Good." Len doesn't really sound like he thinks that this is such a good thing but he doesn't point it out, for which Barry is glad. The other man can be overprotective to a fault when it comes to people he regards as family or close friends.

They fall silent again for a bit, both lost to their own thoughts.

Barry startles when the sound of his phone vibrating on his coffee table suddenly cuts through the silence and his heart leaps when he realizes that he hadn't gotten a reply from Harrison before Len arrived.

A small part of him is worried that he has appeared too clingy and that this text probably holds nothing good, but he pushes it away as he picks up the phone.

"_Sorry for the wait. Hartley and a new scientist got into a quarrel and Caitlin had to get me because I am apparently the headmaster of a school full of hormonal teenagers and not of grown-ups with doctoral degrees. I don't know where I've gone wrong…" _

Barry laughs at the lines and can't help the smile that spreads over his lips.

"Speaking of the devil, hm?" Len smirks, clearly aware from whom he had gotten the text. Barry wonders whether he really looks as lovey-dovey as Lisa insists he does in this moments.

Just as he wants to answer, another message arrives.

"_Are you free this Friday evening? I know _

_a very nice place that makes the best lasagne you can get outside Italy." _

Over the last two weeks, they haven't seen much of each other and the notion of spending an evening together, just the two of them, is quite exhilarating.

"_**I'm probably working till around seven on Friday but afterwards I'm all for Italian cuisine. :)" **_

He sends the text before he turns back to the other man with a slightly abashed smile and blush.

"W-we didn't have time to s-see much of each oth-ther over the l-last two weeks bbecause of h-how crazy busy it w-was at the d-department and with Harrison's wwork at S-S.T.A.R. labs," Barry explains and looks down when he gets another text.

"_Good, I will make the reservations then. _

_And I do miss you as well." _

Warmth settles into his belly and his stomach flutters in that odd but pleasantly so way it often does these days.

"I take it that you two have plans to change that?" Len meets his eyes with a crooked smile and Barry flushes slightly, which causes his friend to chuckle lightly. "It really got you bad." The other man frowns then and he sounds slightly annoyed when he goes on. "I thought Lisa was exaggerating…"

Not sure how to respond to that, Barry averts his eyes, once again worried that an argument with his friend would follow, a bit embarrassed about how obvious his feelings for Harrison are.

"I'm didn't mean to behave like a total jackass again."

Surprised, Barry turns back to Len, who looks grim and unhappy – obviously still not all too fond of the notion that Barry could be together with the scientist – but there is also concern and a faint trace of regret.

"I'm not going to lie and tell you that I like it that you are together with that guy but you are a grown man and sometime I've got to start letting you make your own mistakes."

That is not exactly what Barry wanted to hear and it annoys him that Len is so damn pessimistic about his relationship with Harrison. He would have hoped for a bit more support…

"Y-you d-don't even kn-know him," he reminds angrily and pulls his knees a bit closer while he glare at the other man. "Why d-do you ins-sist on this b-being a mmistake? He has b-been nothing b-but n-nice and g-great so f-far."

Len doesn't immediately answer. Instead, he seems to think about how to reply and somehow this causes Barry to just become more irked.

"I don't like that guy," his friend finally says. "I may be wrong but there is something fishy about him."

"B-because he is inter-rested in m-me?"

It hurts, the notion that Len could think it really that strange that someone like Harrison Wells would want to be with him, even though a part of his own mind is of this exact same opinion as well.

"Partly," agrees Len slowly and sighs in exasperation when Barry gives him a hurt look before turning away so that he is looking at the phone in his hands again. "You are a perfectly nice young man, Bar, much more than you give yourself credit for, but it is odd that Wells becomes interested in you after talking to you for like ten minutes and after he was a widower for nearly twenty years. He didn't date once in that time, no women and especially no men."

"Y-you l-looked him up?" asks Barry with a frown and can't help but feel angry on Harrison's behalf.

"Because that is such an unexpected thing for me to do?" scoffs Len and ignores the glare he receives for it. His expression softens again and he considers Barry for a few seconds before he goes on. "I'm not telling you to break if off with him but I want you to be careful. You may think that you know him but Wells has put a lot of effort in keeping his private life secret from the public-"

"That is h-hardly susp-picious, th-there are p-people who d-don't want th-their private l-live to be p-printed in every g-gossip column."

"I know," agrees Len and sounds somewhat reluctant about it. "And I've already said that I could be wrong but I trust my instincts and they are usually right when it comes to a person's character."

It is frustrating and a bit painful to hear him say so, and Barry feels the sudden urge to kick him out, to ask him to leave and come back when he doesn't feel the urge to ruin this for him anymore.

"Bar." Len's voice is softer now than before and there is the underlying worry that always gets to Barry – because his friend cares. He may be an ass at time but he cares and this is still so damn important. "I just want you to stay alert. Can you do that for me?"

Barry bites his lower lip hard enough that it hurts as he studies the phone in his hands before he glances to his friend with an unhappy expression.

"Yes b-but… can you t-try to be a b-bit more s-supportive of me and Harrison in tturn?"

Another tension settles in between them as Len seems to mull over his plea. Barry doesn't expect him to lie to him, he never does, and thus he is really surprised and quite relieved when the other man gives him a thin smile – that doesn't reach his eyes.

"I can try."


	18. One Door Closes

Barry really likes Harrison's speeches but he knows that he is probably a little bit biased in this regard. He usually could listen to the other man for hours on end, especially when he is talking about something he holds dear to his heart, like tonight.

Tonight, as Barry watches his partner at the podium talk about how Central City's future would be changed forever, he could feel nothing but pride and joy, knowing that the other man's hard work is finally going to pay off.

In not even three hours the particle accelerator would be activated and it would be the start of something new, something better, something Central City and probably so many other people would profit from in the future.

But while many are looking forward to this with hope and confidence, like the people who are currently standing here with Barry, attentively listening to Harrison's words, there are also those who are afraid that this could lead to a catastrophe. There are protests going on outside the premises of S.T.A.R. labs. They have been for weeks now, and even though Barry trusts Harrison and his judgement regarding the particle accelerator, he can't shake off the sense of foreboding that has been clinging to him for days now.

Seeing that just about anybody would agree that he is a notorious worrywart, Barry usually tries to ignore this sensation, although especially right here and right now. This is a big day for S.T.A.R. labs and he knows that Harrison always picks up on his worry. Barry really doesn't want to tarnish this special occasion for him just because of his pessimism…

A tingling flutter fills his stomach when Harrison meets his eyes and Barry lets go of the notion of any possible disaster occurring and instead notices how unusually intense the man's familiar blue eyes seem tonight. Intense and joyful, he can't help but smile at the other man, happy for him and also secretly glad that this means that the stress of the last couple of weeks will be finally over and they can spend some more time together again. They have seen hardly anything of each other for nearly a month now, and while they kept texting and talking over the phone, it just isn't the same.

"You look like a lovesick puppy."

Barry freezes for a second before he reluctantly looks over to Lisa, who watches him with open mirth.

"I've heard there is going to be a celebration tomorrow night should this work out," his friend goes on with a smirk. "But I'm sure you two lovebirds are going to have your _own_ little party later tonight in case your sexy crazy scientist of a boy-friend won't succeed in blowing all of us up, won't you?"

Lisa wiggles her eyes at him and Barry wishes she would keep her voice down just a little bit. The funny looks a couple of the people around them give him now makes him wish that the ground would open up and swallow him whole.

"C-could you k-keep it _down_?" he huffs in annoyance, trying to will the flush away that has overcome his face.

"As a matter of fact, Harrison _did_ ask him to stay over at his house tonight," Iris provides with an amused smirk, laughing when Barry shoots her a betrayed look. So much for entrusting her with that information… at least she lowered her voice, though.

"I w-will never t-tell you _anyth-thing_ again, you t-tattletale," he grumbles. He gives her a half-hearted glare before he turns back to Harrison and takes a sip from his glass of champagne.

"Don't be like that, Bear." Lisa bumps his shoulder and chuckles when he proceeds to ignore her. She then turns to Iris and says in a ridiculously fake-concerned-but thankfully _low_-voice that he is probably just frustrated.

"You know, all the pent up sexual energy," she remarks. Barry feels the crimson of his cheek come back with full force and creep up to his hairline. "They haven't seen much of each other in weeks and you know Barry, he is way too prude to do phone sex."

Iris actually snorts into her glass at this. Barry asks himself, not for the first time, why he is even putting up with either of them.

"Th-that's it, I'm s-so d-done with you two." He gives both of them his best evil eye before he turns to make his way over a couple of steps away from them, so that he could at least listen to the rest of Harrison's speech in peace.

The sound of Iris gasping in surprise and what sounds like slight pain immediately causes him to look back again, though, and he watches how a man in a dark hoodie pushes his way through the crowd towards the exit. It isn't hard to understand what has happened and he is relieved that Iris seems alright – caught off-guard, alarmed, and without her bag, but not hurt.

What _isn't_ a relief is when he notices that Lisa – that damn _crazy_ woman! – is hot on the heels of the thief, clearly intent on catching the guy.

Just for the record, Barry is totally pinning this on Len and Mick, who made complete asses out of themselves just a couple of nights ago when they remarked that all those female heroes who are taking on guys in action movies are total bullshit. He knows that they were not actually referring to women in general but how all of those shown on the screen seem to weigh no more than one hundred pounds and are usually wearing skirts and high-heels. They both had been pretty buzzed, though, and didn't exactly express themselves in the best possible way, which led to a very pissed off Lisa, who seems to have decided to throw her common sense out of the window for now to make a stupid _point_.

Frustrated and worried, Barry takes off after them, stammering excuses to the people he shoves them aside to make way for himself. He feels guilty about worrying Iris as he listens to her calling after him as he exits the large building, exiting into the cool early evening air.

It isn't hard to follow Lisa and the thief, even though they are both pretty fast and already out of view when he steps outside. The blond woman's colourful curses and threats are easier to follow than a trail of bread crumbles would be and Barry takes after them as quickly as he can.

Close to half past seven, the sky has turned completely dark by now and Barry's eyes need a moment to adjust as he turns around the corner and enters a very dimly lit passage between two parts of the S.T.A.R. laboratory complex. There are a number of containers at its end, behind which a fence lies that cuts the private area off from the surrounding industrial land.

Lisa is no longer running, neither is the guy who was unlucky enough to pick Iris as his victim, and Barry nearly feels sick with worry for a second when he makes their silhouettes tumbling on the ground, unable to really say who is who. Then, he picks up on the sheen of familiar blond hair in the faint light of a streetlamp nearby, and he realizes that the person on top is his friend, who is seemingly really succeeding in keeping the struggling guy down on the ground.

"Barry, stop gawking and help me! That pisshead has a gun!"

This gets Barry to shake his stupor off and he hurries to her side before stomping on the man's hand, the one holding the gun – probably with more force than is strictly necessary. The guy cries out in pain once, then again when Barry kicks the weapon out of his now loosened grip.

He urges Lisa a bit back from her position on the guy's back before he presses his knee down between his shoulder blades and puts all his weight on it. He also grabs the wrist of the hand that held the gun before twisting it back in a secure, but probably rather painful position, for the man below him. The guy hisses in agony. Lisa has the other hand already in a similar grip and gives it a vicious tug when the guy calls them rather nasty string of names.

"You r-run b-back and g-get security," Barry tells her, trying to ignore the vulgar curses the thief below him spits at him; it seems that Lisa isn't the only one who has taken a page out of a sailor's book in this regard.

"And let that jackass get up and beat the shit out of you?" the blond woman asks, annoyed. "You're a forensic scientist, Barry, not a real cop!"

Well, thanks a lot, isn't that an ego booster?

Barry doesn't have the opportunity to protest, though, when suddenly the sound of someone running up to them cuts through the air and a moment later three man come around the corner that he passed just a few mere seconds ago.

It happens to be two security guards accompanied by a man that Barry doesn't immediately recognize but who seems oddly familiar to him.

"You guys are alright?" The blond man asks as he crouches down next to him and glances just long enough to them to see them nod before he turns to the still cursing thief at the ground. "CCPD.

You're under arrest, pal."

"I didn't do shit," the guy grunts before he hisses when the man in the grey suit, whom Barry now recognizes as Edward Thawne – or Detective Pretty Boy as many at the precinct like to call him – takes hold of his wrists and slaps his cuffs on them.

"Yeah? There is a lady back at the presentation who says something else-" The detective is cut off when suddenly someone else joins them. Barry really wishes that his friends would have a better sense of self-preservation and standing out of trouble as he turns around to spot Iris.

"Barry, Lisa, are you two alright?" she asks worriedly and Barry is just about tell her to get back inside when he hears the detective next to him grunt in pain. He turns back to him in alarm, not expecting to see the elbow of the wannabe thief smashing into his face, causes a white-hot pain to shoot through his head while a sickening crunch fills the cool night air around them, definitely stemming from what was once the bridge of his nose.

Crying out in pain, Barry falls back onto his ass, his eyes clenched shut as he tries to remind himself that it would be a really stupid idea to give in to the urge and reach for his nose right now.

"_Barry!" "Barry!" _

Both Lisa and Iris sound alarmed and concerned and he forces himself to grit out that he is fine – which, by the way, he is most certainly _not,_ because some damn idiot just _broke his nose_.

There is some scuffle in front of him before Detective Thane warns the guy to stay down, which means that that jackass at least hasn't gotten far.

"Barry," Iris is suddenly kneeling next to him, touching his chin tentatively to urge him to look towards her. "Damn, it looks like he broke it-"

His friend is cut off when someone suddenly cries out in pain and it takes Barry only a second to realize that it has to be the criminal as Lisa starts to call the guy a string of really nasty names while the detective orders her to stop kicking the man.

"Fuck you, you fucking bastard!" she hisses angrily and Barry, who is now watching her kick the poor bastard once again through the tears in his eyes, doesn't miss how livid she looks. "You think you can hurt my friends, you damn disgusting little shit!? Be glad my brother isn't her, he would _skin_ you for this!"

"Miss, please step back," Detective Thawne repeats what must be the fourth time before he turns to one of the security guards, who seem to have decided to make do with watching the spectacle in front of them, and shoots them an annoyed look. "Maybe some help here?"

Two hours later, after Barry's injury has been treated and they've returned to the precinct to give their statements, they take a seat at Detective Pretty Boy's desk.

He is still in some pain and unable to breathe through his nose – which causes him to sound just plain ridiculous whenever he says something – and is also very much in a miserable mood as he will no longer be around for the activation of the particle accelerator, something he has been looking forward to for _months_ now, because, seriously, how often do you get the change to watch something like this happen from front row seats? Especially from front row seats with the person you love at your side?

Damn his _rotten_ luck…

Harrison, who left the whole ruckus with his guests and reporters for a couple of minutes when he learned what had happened, was visibly concerned and agreed with the detective that Barry needed to see a doctor.

"I'm fine, I don't need a doctor," he protests, not liking the notion of leaving just then at all.

"Your nose is broken," Harrison reminds him and stepping a bit closer, seemingly oblivious to the people around them – or not really caring that someone is watching. He tentatively cups Barry's right left cheek and studies him for a second, looking very concerned.

"I'm n-not even b-bleeding anymore," Barry points out and hates how off he sounds like this and how just speaking hurts like hell. He hesitates for a second before he reluctantly adds. "I've b-been looking forward t-to being there with y-you, t-ton-night."

"So have I." His hand moves to Barry's neck where it cups him securely as Harrison met his eyes firmly. "I really want you at my side tonight, Barry, but you are hurt and your health is so much more important than this could ever be."

Feeling in pain and sullen at the prospect that he has to leave, causes Barry to give him a rather petulant glare. This in turn causes him to feel stupid now and a lot like a thankless ass, seeing that his partner had a point and even assured him that he would tell him in great detail about anything that was going to occur in about forty-five minutes from now.

He feels really bad now about how they parted ways before…

That line of thought comes to an abrupt halt when he notices how Iris, who is sitting to his left, turns to him once more, still looking rather guilty about the whole thing. "I'm really sorry that you got hurt because of my stupid bag, Bear."

"It's f-fine," he assures her as he tries to ignore how he sounds, like he has the world's worst cold. He gives her a comforting smile as he continues. "It's n-not your f-fault th-that guy tried to s-steal it."

"Yeah, stop yapping already, you're getting on my nerves, precious," Lisa mutters from his other side, obviously still annoyed that she has to be inside an actual precinct. This earns her a glare from Iris and Barry is once again reminded why it is never a good idea to take the seat between both of them.

"If it weren't for _you_, he wouldn't have been hurt in the first place!"

"I thought it was due to _your_ stupid bag?"

"You run after that guy like a _moron_!"

"You're welcome for me trying to get back your stupid stuff, missy!"

Detective Thawne, who is still writing down Lisa's last statement, frowns slightly at both women before he glances at Barry with an incredulous expression that says as much as 'Y_ou're voluntarily putting up with that?_'.

His only response is to let himself sink a bit lower into his chair.

Thirty minutes later, Barry finds himself in his lab, which is thankfully quiet as both Iris and Lisa have left about five minutes ago, no longer pissed at each other, but now angry with him as he has told them in a rather sharp tone to stop behaving so damn childish – which may not have been the best choice of words, everything considered, but his head still feels like someone had been playing soccer with it and he really couldn't stand their bickering any longer.

He feels bad, which is to be expected as he always tends to do so when he has a fight with either woman, no matter whether he is in the right or not, and he decides that he would apologize to them later, as soon as his head stops threatening to split open from its top.

If Joe was around, he would have asked him for a lift, but the detective is currently working on a case, which leaves him to try and rest at one of his lab tables until the two aspirin he just took start to work their magic.

His head is resting on his arms, the room around him mostly dark other than for the light that falls in from the rest of the precinct and from the city outside. It is just what he wants, peace and quiet and the possibility to feel sorry for himself, because he knows that the particle accelerator has been running now for a couple of minutes, which means that he really missed its activation…

Harrison sent him a text as soon as it started to work and Barry, looking outside the windows overlooking Central City, wonders whether they are currently drinking champagne – he knows that it's a really expensive bottle the other man has saved up for this occasion – and whether everybody has finally started to relax a bit again. Being over at S.T.A.R. labs has been always a rather tense experience over the last couple of weeks, especially after the incident with Hartley, and he really hopes that the mood will lighten up again now that they've reached their goal.

The soft patter of the rain that started about an hour ago grows a bit louder now and Barry lifts his gaze to the sky, noticing for the first time how thick and heavy the dark clouds are actually looking, nearly threatening so.

Great, this stupid day really couldn't end any other–

A flash cracks across the night sky and baths everything in a blinding white light for a second, causing Barry to startle and shut his eyes, before a deep rumbling follows.

"So much for no rain tonight," he mumbles to himself as he sits up, thinking back to the weather forecast he looked up before leaving to S.T.A.R. labs this late afternoon. Well, it's not the first time the weather network has been wrong and it's probably not the last time either.

Another bolt of lightning flashes overhead, just as bright, and Barry can't help but wince again. The rain is really picking up now as well, which causes him to get up as he has to close the windows and secure the lab. The Captain would have his head if they had a flood in here because he forgot to close them this afternoon.

Damn storms…

The now following thunder is even louder than the one before and Barry jumps slightly when his phone vibrates for a moment, indicating that he has just gotten a text.

"_**You really have the worst luck, brat. Getting sucker punched and a storm that looks like it's about to introduce the end of the world. You're doing alright, kid?" **_

Barry smiles and can't help but feel better thanks to Len's brief text. It seems that he has already learned of his small run-in with the thief tonight, which means that Lisa must have called him.

"_I'm fine, just a headache-" _

Another crack cuts through the otherwise quiet room as another flash of lightning blinds him for a second. The following thunder is nearly painfully loud and strong enough that he can actually feel the rumbling in his _bones_.

He decides that he will answer Len in a minute, _after_ he closes the windows, hopefully before the rain can really do some damage.

Most of the windows are easy to shut. Only the sun roof window takes any real effort. Barry hurries to do so and is nearly done when he notices another bright flash out of the corner of his eyes. His first thought is that it is just ordinary lightning bolt but somehow it seems off. He turns his head to take a better look when suddenly the ground beneath his feet starts to tremble for a couple of seconds, like a wave rushing underground.

This couldn't have been caused by a storm… an explosion, perhaps?

"No…"

This couldn't be…

Barry turns completely to the window now, one hand drops from the chain as he does so, and his stomach sinks when he realizes that the bright flash came from the direction of S.T.A.R. Labs.

Harrison…

His mouth turns dry and he feels slightly sick as another flash lightens up the sky, followed closely by another loud roll of thunder. This can't be happening…

The sky above him seems to be split in half by another sharp crack, and Barry realize too late that he should not have kept his hold on metal chain in the middle of a lightening st–


	19. One Door Closes Interlude

The beeping of the heart monitor is the only sound in the lab when Eobard enters at about eleven at night, shortly after Caitlin notifies him that she is now leaving. He already knows that their latest visitor still hasn't left though by Caitlin's slightly guilty and worried expression, even before she opens her mouth to speak.

"It's fine, Dr. Snow, I will take care of it," he assures her, wishing her a good night before leaving his office and making his way down to the lab in which Barry is currently being monitored.

Of the young man's regular guests, Lisa Snart is usually the last one to leave the laboratories, thanks in part to her not really giving a damn about reasonable visiting hours or posing, perhaps, as an inconvenience to anybody else working there. However, Eobard knows that there is no real reason to prevent her from staying overnight, nothing other than the fact that he does not want to give up those few precious hours in which he can be alone with Barry. This usually results in him having to point out to her that she is always welcome to visit Barry again the next day and that she needs her rest as well, and yadda, yadda, yadda…

This has become an annoying routine by now, one which has really begun to grate on his nerves.

Like her brother, Lisa Snart is ridiculously stubborn though, and while he expected as much – he had to deal with those two pests more than once before already – it still irks him to no end how she is all too willing to pick a fight with him, sometimes even going so far to try and goading him on.

It always makes him want to squeeze her throat until he sees the life fade from her pretty eyes…

He done so a number of times before in other timelines, and while it has always been satisfying enough experience in the past, he is aware that she is one of Barry's closest friends. Killing her would therefore only make things unnecessarily complicated after the young man wakes up from his coma.

"Miss Snart," Eobard greets her in a soft voice, making it sound as though he doesn't want to startle her, even though he knows that she had been aware of his presence the moment he entered the room. She is quite observant in this regard – annoyingly so.

"Dr. Wells," the young woman replies and only briefly glances over her shoulder to give him a plainly hostile look. "What a _pleasant_ surprise."

Unlike Det. West and his daughter, Lisa hasn't lost any of her scorn for him so far and always makes sure to let him know it.

In a way, Eobard thinks this is a little funny, considering that Lisa Snart could just as well have ended up loathing the young man she is so very worried about right now. Eobard has seen this happen a number of times, and even though her relationship with Barry is beneficial for his own plans, he can't say that he wouldn't like for them to be on opposite sides again. It would give him the opportunity to hurt her, make sure that the glare is replaced by fear before it slowly morphs into true terror…

This disgusting little bug...

He intends to get rid of her as soon as he could afford to.

His gaze moves from the young woman to Barry, who hasn't moved an inch sine Eobard left him a couple of hours ago.

It is somehow daunting to see him this still… wrong, in a way; unsettling.

The urge to speed over and touch the young man, make sure that he is alright – still _his_ – is nearly overwhelming.

"Do you actually ever leave?"

Eobard turns his attention from Barry to the young woman, whose eyes are now on him again, a mixture of resentment and suspicion blatantly obvious in them.

"You are always around whenever I come over," Lisa goes on with a disapproving frown. "Don't you have a life or something?"

It would be so easy to kill her. Snap her neck, strangle her until her body goes limp… though, he knows that these are not viable options for him at the moment. It would pose too many questions to her brother and the authorities, questions he is not willing to worry about should the young woman wind up dead tonight.

"My life is here," Eobard answers after a tense moment passes between them. He doesn't shy away from her hostile glare. "It's rests in the bed in front of you, and I have no intention of letting go of him anytime soon, Miss Snart."

Something flickers across her eyes, something angry and upset. She actually looks about ready to jump at his throat.

"He is not _your_ life," Lisa Snart hisses at him as she rises from her seat, fists clenched and nearly shaking with rage. "He is the person you nearly killed, one of those lucky enough not to immediately die due to your fucked up experiment!"

It is hard to keep his expression calm, to not give into the anger of being spoken to in this way by such a measly little creature. In any other situation, he would have gotten rid of her right now, just to spare himself her ongoing whining.

Though, that woman has some gall, he has to give her that.

In all the times he has had to deal with all these tedious people involved in Barry's life, he never once felt the same kind of bored animosity towards her as he did towards Iris West. Contrary to the West girl, Lisa is able to post a threat if she wanted to. She and her brother were nearly always a thorn in his side and he learned that underestimating them is not a wise thing to do. He did so once before-he let himself become too arrogant, believed himself too clever to have to be wary of any of them thanks to his own knowledge of time and space, of how the universe – at least, this universe – worked.

He would never do that again.

The blond bitch and her pain of a brother, as well as their ridiculous band of misfits, are people he has had kept a close eye on since the very beginning.

He wouldn't let them get another chance to stab him in the back…

Some of the fury that is currently curling up his guts, has to be visible on his face as the young woman in front of him suddenly looks slightly scared, worried, as if afraid of him and what he could do to her.

Good…

… Or not, he reminds himself, can't helping but feel annoyed over his own incapability to let this blond bimbo get to him.

The urge to sigh and take his glasses off to pinch the bridge of his nose is strong but he doesn't want to show her how much she able to rile him up. Instead, he forces himself to regain control over his feelings and push the need to hurt her to the back of his mind. If not for the fact the he already knew that the Snart woman had no romantic interest in Barry…

He shakes the notion off and tries to school his features in a familiar display of sadness and regret, but lets a bit of the impatience show through to that she understands how difficult it is for him to remain _pleasant_.

"I think it would be redundant for me to repeat to you how sorry I am about what has happened with the particle accelerator and to Barry," he says, watching how the blond woman's eyes narrow, an indication of how displeased she is with his excuses.

Too bad for her.

"I know you're going through a hard time right now, Miss Snart, and I understand that you're upset, but this ongoing animosity towards me is not helping this situation nor is it helping Barry," Eobard goes on, and not for the first time he wonders whether he should have stuck to his image as a paraplegic, whether this would have earned him a bit more sympathy from this harpy, but he is quite sure that this would likely not have been the case.

Like her brother, Lisa could be ridiculously stubborn and unwilling to forgive.

"My people and I are going to do whatever we can to make sure that he is going to wake up, but we are no magicians. Some things just need time."

And isn't that just hilarious coming from him?

Eobard may be many things but patience is certainly not something that comes naturally to him. At times he really wishes he could smack this damn woman over her head because there she is, bitching at him about how Barry still hasn't regained his conscious after nearly half a year, oblivious to how it feels not like mere months but like an actual millennium to him.

"Time," Lisa scoffs with an outright sneer. "Time to waste away in a fucking sickbed in a fucked up laboratory that is led by a fucked up crazy scientist who tried to play god and got himself and the rest of the city burned."

After a while she really starts to sound like a broken record.

Eobard tries not to frown and reminds himself that he should be glad in a way. She is behaving like this because she is worried about Barry. He still isn't sure how smart it was to allow her and her brother – and their rotten friends – to get this close to Barry, despite what history has taught him, but he knows that it is better to trust collected data than his own instincts at times.

While this means that he could not let the blond witch have a fatal accident, it does not say anything about making her trip down a flight of stairs later on. A broken ankle or arm might not have the same effect as a broken neck, but it would be sufficient.

For now.

"I'm not your enemy." Eobard keeps his voice calm and soothing. "I have the same goal as you, Miss Snart. I want to get Barry back."

The blond woman eyes him with a mixture of ire and distrust before she cocks her head slightly to one side and gives him an unpleasant smile.

"We aren't friends either, Dr. Wells. Not as long as I can't be sure that he won't stay a damn vegetable until the end of his life." She nods to Barry at that. Eobard doesn't miss the worry and guilt that flashes through her blue eyes.

"You couldn't have helped him even if you had stayed at the precinct that night."

His words earn him another glare and it is hard not to chuckle over how stupid this woman is. What does she think she could have done to prevent fate? That night, the night in which the particle accelerator exploded, is destined to always create the Flash, one way or another.

Despite her grating stupidity, it is fascinating to see how much harder Barry's accident has hit her than it has Iris West. Not that the former to-be-West-Allen isn't worried about her friend or spending every other day at his side, but the Snart woman...she reminds Eobard of a bitch whose pup has been hurt and whom she is willing to protect with her teeth and nails.

Annoying, sure, but also quite amusing.

"And he will wake up," he adds with certainty that isn't hard to put into his words because Barry awaking from this coma is just a matter of a few more months.

"He better." Lisa turns her gaze back to Barry with a concerned expression that makes her look older than she is. "If he doesn't…"

She lets the sentence die away but the threat is still hard to miss.

"He will," Eobard assures her once more. He is now also studying the calm expression on Barry's face, and he once again notices how relaxed he appears, how at peace. The need to walk over to him is strong, as is the urge to touch him again, itching in his fingertips.

God, how he wants that damn woman gone so that he finally spend some time alone with him...

"He will wake up," he tells her once more. "He may not think so himself but he is very strong."

"And stupid," Lisa adds before meeting his amused gaze with a somewhat less hostile one but still goes on. "He trusts people too easily."

"He does." Eobard studies her and only hesitates briefly before he decides that two can play at this game here. "Like crazy scientists with delusions of grandeur or criminals who are becoming more infamous with every passing year, the kind of people who could easily cost him his job should anybody ever learn of it."

The words have the desired effect and it is hard not to smirk in satisfaction as he watches the Snart woman tense up as a look of panic crosses her expression for a second.

Then, the surprise and worry is replaced by a much calmer look again as she eyes him calculatingly.

"You wouldn't tattle on him, Dr. Wells," she doesn't asked this but states it like a fact, which, to be fair, it is. Eobard has no interest to cause Barry any trouble for being friends with this bunch of idiots. Their fondness for each other would soon dissipate anyway.

"No, I won't," he agrees, but most of the – be it fake – friendliness is gone from his expression. "It isn't my place to tell him whom to spend his time with and Barry is a very smart but troubled young man. I know that he doesn't give his trust away easily."

Annoyance crosses the blond woman's face and it really becomes difficult not to smirk in her face because he knows how little she liked that Barry has confided in him regarding the abuse in his past. Eobard was there, invisible to any mere human's eye, when the younger man told her, and while Lisa assured him that it was good that he finally found someone to talk with about this besides her and her brother, she didn't really like it.

"This doesn't mean that I won't consider calling the police the next time your brother decides to creep inside my laboratories in the middle of the night," Eobard goes on seriously, having some difficulty in keeping the irritation out of his tone, because while he expected Snart to eventually turn up, Eobard hates to have him anywhere close to Barry. It has always been like this. The familiarity between those two was both helping his plan along for now but also posing a possible threat in future.

The first time this unwanted visitor passed by, Eobard had been more surprised about how long it took the criminal to finally turn up and he voluntarily slipped into super speed to watch the other man as he interacted with Barry. It was interesting and slightly infuriating to see how close that man was to Barry, how unabashed he was when it comes to touching him, like taking hold of his hand or brushing a streak of hair out of his face.

It was hard to not give into the urge to smash Snart's head against a wall at super speed because Barry belongs to Eobard and to Eobard _only_.

… it also doesn't help how this idiot meddles with his security system every time he decides to pass by and that he does it in such a way that would make any actual hacking professional shudder.

"Barry would never forgive you if you sic the cops on Len." Lisa pulls his attention back to the here and now, and while she tries to sound as self-assured as before, he can easily detect the uncertainty in her voice.

Eobard pretends to study her for a long moment, even though he has already decided where to go from here as the only reason he hasn't taken care of Snart by now is because he knows he could use this for his own advantage.

"I have a proposal for your brother, Miss Snart," he finally says. "I know that you, like most of the residents of the Twin cities, currently see me as some kind of monster, and you probably have every right to do so. This doesn't make my intentions to help Barry any less real, though, and I think that a visit from your brother could be beneficial for him. They are both obviously close enough that Mr. Snart is willing to face the danger of being caught every time he passes by."

He gives her a faint smile, pleased to see some of her hostility and wariness gone from her blue eyes.

"What's the catch?" Lisa asks, and while she sounds still harsh and suspicious, he doesn't miss the hope that lies below. She obviously is about as happy that her brother has been caught breaking and entering into a place like S.T.A.R. labs as Eobard is.

"No catch," he tells her earnestly, but adds. "Well, I expect him to stop messing with my security system should he accept my offer, and he can only pass by at night when nobody else is around as I'm not willing to have my name dragged anymore through the muck than it already has been."

The brunette woman eyes him thoughtfully with a frown, clearly going over the pros and cons of this offer.

"You don't mess with my brother and expect to get away with it," she finally says, and he nearly has to laugh at her boldness because he is certain the little witch would never dare to talk to him like this should she know who he really is.

"It is a good thing, then, that I do not intend to mess with Mr. Snart," he replies with a thin smile.

"Good." Lisa nods and studies him a bit longer before turning back to Barry with a still thoughtful expression.

Her next question is not one Eobard s expecting.

"Can another friend come along as well?" she asks .When his face darkens at her request, she quickly adds, "He won't cause you any trouble, my brother will make sure of it."

It isn't hard to guess whom she is talking about. Eobard wonders once again what it is with the Flash and his Rogues...

Even in the original timeline Barry had a relationship with his most famous enemies that can only be described as strange if you compare them it to relationships between other heroes and their respective rogue galleries. While the strongest bond usually developed between Barry and Len, it doesn't take much to extend this sometimes reluctant camaraderie to the other Rogues as well.

In a way it is fascinating, funny even, especially if one considers what a stickler to the rules the initial Barry Allen was – a trait all of his altered versions at least share to some degree – but, even so, none of this has ever sat too well with Eobard, who never liked to interact with this group of gaudily clad idiots, and he hated it when the news described him as one of the Flash _Rogues_ in the past.

They are _nothing_ like him.

This is the reason why he nearly refuses the young woman's request.

Nearly.

"If I agree to this, I want you to be aware that I will hold you and your brother responsible should anything happen to Barry or my laboratories during their visits. I will turn to the police should anything be stolen, whether it be equipment or data, or if anything is broken, Miss Snart," he tells her seriously and he means it. He really doesn't have the patience for any of this right now.

"Does that mean you're not going to supervise them?" she asks with an amused smirk, clearly surprised by his willingness to let her brother and Rory visit Barry in private.

"Should I take this as a hint that I have to?" he replies with a faint smile on his own.

Lisa actually chuckles at that and shrugs. "Well, they _are_ criminals after all."

"I'm not joking here. If they-"

"_Fine_," she cuts him off with a huffs before she gives him another annoyed look that holds no real hostility anymore. "But just to be clear, you _are_ going to pay should this be a trap."

"Do you really think that it's in your best interest if you threaten me?" Eobard asks with a slightly exasperated frown as he really wants to finally end this conversation and have this annoying witch gone.

"It's not a threat," Lisa replies seriously. "It's just a statement of what's going to happen if that's the case, and I don't want you to misunderstand any of this. I'm would be truly grateful if you would really allow Len to visit, but you're still the one responsible for Barry being in a coma in the first place. As long as he stays like that, I will always see you as nothing more than the reckless egomaniacal idiot who put him there."

The notion of her tripping down a flight of stairs suddenly doesn't seem sufficient anymore as Eobard listens to her insult him to his face.

For a split-second he considers taking care of her in this very moment but he swiftly lets go of that idea again as he knows that it would only cause a lot of uncomfortable questions he isn't willing to bother with, let alone having to explain to Barry that he has lost one of his best friends during his time unconscious.

"I understand," he says thus, and the anger he is feeling seems to seep through his mask of calmness because Lisa eyes him once more warily, like a rat eyes a cat. "I really have to ask you to leave now. It is already quite late and you know that you can pass by tomorrow again."

A tense moment passes between them and Eobard suddenly wonders whether he has given too much of his ire away, enough to cause her worry and suspicion to grow again and drag this unpleasant evening on for even longer.

Thankfully, this isn't the case.

"Fine." Lisa gives him one last hard look before she gets up and steps closer to Barry so that she can cup his cheek.

It is another one of these intimate gestures that cause Eobard's pulse to rise in anger, but he forces himself to keep calm. It is only a question of mere minutes before he can have Barry for himself, after all.

"Sweet dreams, Bear," the young woman says in a soft voice before she runs her fingers through his hair. "I'll be back tomorrow again with another one of your boring ass science magazines, okay?"

Lisa then steps back and turns to him with a way less friendly expression.

"Good night, Dr. Well, and… thank you."

"You are welcome, Miss Snart," he replies before he asks her whether she wants him to accompany her on her way out.

"That is very gentlemanlike of you." The smile she gives him at that is thin and makes it clear that she has had enough of his presence for today as well. "But I think I can manage on my own."

And then, finally, Eobard watches as this annoying woman makes her way out of his lab.

He walks over to the closest monitor and opens the feed to the different security cameras so that he can make sure that she really makes her way out of there.

If the Snart woman keeps this up, he would start to turn grey in the couple of months before Barry wakes up. He has really underestimated the level of annoyance that woman is capable of. At least he wouldn't have to worry about her brother turning up unannounced after tonight. The security system usually informs him of intruders beforehand as Snart really isn't as clever as he likes to think he is when it comes to passing it by undetected, but his unexpected visits are still something Eobard loathes. The time he can spend with Barry alone is too short as it is and he hates giving up even just a minute of it.

After the blond woman has finally left the building, he locks the entrances and makes his way back to Barry.

For a few moments he just takes in the young man in front of him, how serene but also pale he looks. Then, he takes his shoes off and puts the side bars of the hospital bed down before pulling back the white blanket back covering Barry up to his chest. Carefully, as if not to disturb him, Eobard climbs into the bed next to him, which leaves him with hardly enough space to rest, let alone to get comfortable, but he isn't bothered as he only stays in this position before he moves on, ending up half covering the younger man, one leg across Barry's, one arm across his chest, and his face nuzzled up in the crook of his neck.

Feeling him this close—the solidness of his body, the speed force thrumming just beneath the surface of his skin, full of life and energy, a force that holds so much promise, and this smell – this delicious smell…

Eobard sighs softly and closes his eyes.

If he could, he would pause time now so that this moment would never end.

Here, with Barry in his arms, he is at peace.


	20. Nine Months Lost

"-ust don't understand why we can't put on something that has been produced _within_ his lifetime." A voice…

Barry frowns, or at least he tries to.

His feels odd.

Heavy, too heavy for him to move, while his head feels too light, like it's filled with cotton.

It is an uncomfortable feeling and he tries to shake it off, push it away to regain clarity of where he is and what is going on.

Then, he's assaulted by a memory.

At least, he thinks it is a memory...

Or maybe it's a dream?

He isn't sure but it is like an itch somewhere at the back of his mind, and he really tries to focus on it, grasp it, but it is like water, running right through his fingers before he can make anything out.

It is frustrating.

The odd heaviness persists, clinging to him with enough force that it nearly scares him.

It is like he has been snapped out of… _something_. Sleep?

It's an odd feeling… All of him feels… strange.

_Distorted_?

What an unsettling thought…

… Did he _drink_ last night?

"No more _Pokerface_, Mr. Ramon."

That voice…

He tries to move but it's as if something is pressing down on him, trying to hold him still…

What is going on?

"It doesn't have to be anything from Lady Gaga," grumbles the first voice, sounding vaguely familiar by now. "I just thought he would like to keep up with the charts."

"I like Vivaldi," a third voice adds.

… Caitlin?

"Vivaldi is _great._ I'm not saying anything against the guy, but we've been listening to his _Four Seasons_ for all of today already."

Cisco, this is definitely Cisco.

Is he at S.T.A.R. labs? Did he fall asleep?

Why does he feel so groggy?

Oh god, did he fall asleep while visiting the laboratories? Hartley would never let him-

Oh… right. Hartley was no longer part of S.T.A.R. labs…

"We've been listening to _The Fame_ for nearly _five_ days before that," Caitlin points out and sounds audibly annoyed as she does so. This is seriously odd, seeing that Barry can't remember the staff of S.T.A.R. labs having ever listened to electropop or music in general during work.

"I've uploaded my whole collection of classics, Cisco."

Barry feels himself tense up, but just as suddenly his worry dissipates as he recognizes Harrison's voice.

"We can change to Beethoven next if you'd prefer that," the other man informs the younger scientist. Barry doesn't have to see him to know that he is enjoying himself right now.

… Harrison.

He sounds alright, which is good, really good and… Barry doesn't understand why he _shouldn't_ be okay, but even so he is glad about it all the same.

Then, for a split-second, an image comes to his mind. A man, tall and fit, clad almost entirely in a tight yellow suit with blazing red eyes, grinning down at him, one of his hands around Barry's throat, the other is holding onto something like a bluish gleaming dagger.

Barry's heart nearly jumps up to his throat as he tries to move, to get away from the man in yellow but-

Another image replaces it.

It's not of a person or a place, it's just a cacophony of red, orange, and yellow and a feeling of absolute freedom he has never experienced before. It's thrilling, like a powerful current running through his body, making him feel like there exist no boundaries that could hold him back.

Another image follows, one of a young woman and a young boy. Both of them smiling at him.

She is beautiful, familiar…

A kiss…

He knows her, he thinks. His mind suddenly feels fuzzy…

Then there is a young man in a glowing green outfit, grinning broadly at him, looking so very sure of himself, so very full of life, before he is replaced by what must be an older version of himself, less cheeky, more serious...

Barry is overcome by a feeling of fond exasperation that he doesn't understand. Does he know that man? He doesn't think so…

Then there is… pain? Cold?

A man in a parka, smirking at him, cursing him, kissing him…

He too seems oddly familiar…

Before Barry can try to pinpoint where this familiarity is coming from, his mind is flooded by images of other people, other places, so many that he is certain his head is going to burst open any moment now from the assault of colours and emotions he does not understand.

Then it is back to _him_, the man in yellow.

This time it is different, Barry doesn't feel as threatened by him or as scared as before. This image and the sensations associated with it are something he actually recognizes as a memory, or...maybe _not_ a perfect memory, but still a situation his mind made up when he was only a small child.

The man in yellow is holding him, carrying him away from… _that_ horrible place.

There is no fear or, at least, not so much fear of the man. Back then – whether it really happened or not, he can't say for sure – Barry did feel afraid of him, that stranger with the glowing red eyes, who looked a bit like a demon from the cartoons his older foster siblings watched at that time but-

His mind is suddenly empty, all the images – memories? – gone again and Barry is left feeling shaken and confused.

What the heck is going on with him? Is he getting sick?

That can't be happening, not so close to when the particle accelerator is going to-

It feels like his heart jumps up into his throat when the realisation hits him that the particle accelerator has already been activated-

_Harrison_!

Barry is suddenly standing, on legs that feel about as stable as jelly, and it probably shouldn't take him by surprise when they give out under him just a second later.

The expected impact with the ground never happens, though, as his upper arms are grabbed firmly, and he is helped to keep upright.

"It's alright, Barry," Harrison assures him in this calm voice of his, and suddenly Barry doesn't care about whether the world around him spins or not or how shaky and unlike himself he feels, because he is right there, the other man is right there with him and this is such a _relief_.

Harrison doesn't protest when Barry wraps his arms around him and clings to him like he is his very lifeline.

There has been an explosion, he can remember it now, the feeling of the ground shaking beneath his feet, and the light, the dome of blinding brightness that started to rise behind the line of skyscrapers.

The utter horror that hit him when he realized that things must've gone wrong and that Harrison and the others were at the heart of it all.

And then there was… lightening?

Barry feels his body tense up and the odd sensation that something is fundamentally wrong with him returns.

What is going on?

Harrison cups the back of his neck comfortingly and it helps to focus his scattered thoughts. There is still this overwhelming feeling of disorientation but he can feel the other man, solid and real, and it soothes the panic that tries to overwhelm him.

"A-are y-you ok-kay?" he asks and it is then that he realizes that his teeth are chattering, that his whole body is actually trembling.

The other man chuckles, soft and low, and Barry gives in to the urge to bury his face into the crook of his neck, still somewhat afraid that he will vanish any moment now.

Something is wrong, he just knows it, and it is so damn unsettling...

"I think I should be the one asking you that question," Harrison tells him, his breath warm against Barry's temple as he speaks. Then there is a brush of lips against his skin and Barry jumps slightly, taken aback and slightly alarmed, but he can't bring himself to pull back even so.

"I'm sorry," Harrison goes on and the plain relief in his voice isn't lost on Barry. "I didn't mean to startle you. I'm just glad that you're finally… that you're alright."

Reluctantly, Barry pulls back and gives him a confused look.

"I… h-haven't I b-been alr-right?"

It is then that he notices both Cisco and Caitlin hovering close by behind Harrison. They look worried and slightly alarmed and, in Cisco's case, also quite awed.

None of this is really reassuring.

"Barry, you really should sit down before we talk about anything." Harrison meets his eyes with a concerned frown. "I don't think you should be up again just yet." For a moment he seems to hesitate before he goes on. "It's been a while since you've been on your feet."

"Wh-what?" Barry's feels only more confused by these words but he still follows along when Harrison tentatively urges him to take a sit on the medical bed.

Being off his feet does help a bit with the disorientation and it is easier to focus on the other man, who is still so close that he would just have to lean forward to rest his head against his chest. This makes it easier for his nerves to settle, knowing that Harrison is alright and right here. "You've been in a coma."

Barry freezes.

That… that is not what he was expecting to hear…

"Wh-what? Wh-why?"

Why would he have been in a coma? He…

The lightning? He was hit by it…

Did that really happen?

"For h-how long?" he asks, just throwing that question out there, mostly to have something to concentrate on other than the jumble of thoughts that is currently clustering inside his mind.

If he really got hit by lightning, does that mean that the rest of his memories are real as well? Did S.T.A.R. labs explode? But how could that be? He's pretty sure he's there right now.

"-ing to me? Barry?"

A touch to his shoulder causes him to flinch, back but it also brings his mind back to the present, where Harrison is currently watching him with a rather concerned expression.

"S-sorry, I… m-my mind feels j-jumbled," he explains, reaching for the other man's arm. He grasps it firmly just below the elbow and again feels better as soon as the little contact between them is established.

"I think that is very understandable," Harrison replies with a faint smile that doesn't do much to lift the worried frown off his face.

"I've b-been hit by l-lightning," Barry murmurs and notices how the other man's frown slightly deepens at that.

"Yes," Harrison agrees quietly.

A heavy silence settles between them and Barry isn't sure how to take all of this in. This is just too much to swallow. He still feels so out of it.

"The p-particle accelerator…" He leans forward, so that his forehead is resting against Harrison's chest, and closes his eyes. "There w-was an a-accident."

It isn't a question and the tension on the room seems to suddenly double in its intensity.

"I r-rem-member it," he goes on. "The exp-plosion."

A warm hand settles on the back of his head. Barry squeezes his eyes shut. He tries to concentrate on how solid and real Harrison feels, how he is really there.

"I-I w-was s-so s-scared y-you…"

Harrison makes a small shushing sound and Barry shudders when he settles his other arm around his back, pulling him slightly closer.

"I'm sorry I scared you like this," the older man tells him and the regret is audible in his voice.

"Wh-what h-happened?"

Everything seemed to be going well that night. Barry had been there the day before the particle accelerator was supposed to go active and everything seemed to work out just as planned, everybody was confident and Harrison seemed so very pleased and happy.

"We aren't sure." Harrison sounds tired and regretful, and Barry understands why because the particle accelerator was intended to be a stepping stone to a better future if things had worked out as intended. But they obviously hadn't and this means that the other man's dream has likely turned into one big horrible nightmare for him and anybody else within the twin cities' borders.

"I'm s-so sorry," he utters and tries to fight the tears back at the notion how devastating this has to be for him.

"Me too," Harrison replies quietly and squeezes Barry's neck lightly. "But that doesn't hinder how glad I'm that you're awake again, Barry."

Harrison pulls back then, looking down at him with a sad but firm smile, and Barry shudders slightly when a hand tentatively cups his cheek.

"You have no idea how worried I've been about you."

It is still odd hearing this, being reminded of how much he means to the other man.

"H-how long have I b-been… g-gone?"

The notion that he could have been stuck in a coma for weeks or even months while the world around him went on is unsettling. He wonders how Iris and the oth-

"How a-are m-my f-f-friends?"

God, how were Len and Lisa?! He hadn't even thought of them until just now!

"D-do y-you kn-know i-if th-they're alr-right?"

The thought alone that something could have happened to them is sickening and he looks up to Harrison with a pleading gaze, as if the man could somehow change time itself should they have been hurt.

"Your friends are fine," Harrison assures him.

"They've dropped by to visit you nearly every day," Caitlin pipes up from behind the older man, and Barry remembers just then that they aren't alone.

"Yeah, it got quite crowded in here at times," agrees Cisco. Barry doesn't miss the slightly uneasy look on the younger scientist's face, one that he admittedly doesn't quite understand.

"N-none of th-them have b-been h-hurt?"

"No, they've been very lucky." Harrison brushes his thumb over Barry's cheekbone. It is such a tentative and loving gesture that it causes a familiar warmth to settle in his belly, successfully calming some of his worries.

"You haven't b-been hurt eith-ther?" he asks the other man while leaning slightly into the caressing touch.

There is a slight pause and an immediate panic creeps back into Barry, causing him to tense up. Before he can come to any worrisome conclusions though, Harrison goes on.

"I'm fine," he tells him with a faint smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "There have just been some unexpected consequences associated with the explosion."

Explosion.

Barry shudders at the sound of it. It is horrifying just to imagine what a destructive force that must have been. He suddenly wonders how Central City and Keystone City are doing as a whole.

"What c-consequenc-ces?" he asks, concerned, and gives the other man a careful once over. He looks fine but when Barry glances back to the other scientists and he doesn't miss Caitlin's slight frown or how she has her lips pursed in that way she usually does when she doesn't agree with something.

This can't mean anything good…

Barry focuses his gaze on Harrison's face again when he pulls his hand back, ending the comforting touch abruptly. He meets his eyes with a tired and troubled look.

"It is difficult to explain. We aren't even entirely sure what really caused the accelerator's malfunction in the first place. Whatever the exact reason was, it didn't just result in an explosion, but it also caused some of the already produced anti-matter to be expelled into the air." Harrison takes his glasses off and pinches the bridge of his nose, sighing softly as he does so. For a moment he stays like this, probably thinking about how to go on, so Barry doesn't urge him as it isn't hard to guess how devastating all of this must really be for him.

"The antimatter, in combination with the leaked energy burst, seems to have… unexpected consequences for some." The older man finally looks back at him with a grim but also apologizing expression, his lips are pressed into a thin line and there is a tension to him that is nearly palpable.

"Wh-what c-consequ-quences?" Barry repeats, the worry nearly making him sick. "Y-you said you were fine…"

"I am fine." Harrison reaches for him again so than he can cup his neck as he meets his eyes. "I'm as healthy as I probably can be, you don't need to worry about that." He averts his eyes to the side for a moment, a slight frown in place as he seems to think about how to go on before he turns back to him. "It seems that the accelerator explosion caused some alterations to me, though."

"Alter-rations?" Barry asks, giving the other man a searching and concerned look. "Wh-what do you m-mean?"

"Superpowers!"

Barry isn't the only one who turns to look at Cisco after his little outburst, but Barry is probably the only one who doesn't give the younger scientist a look of exasperation for this piece of information.

"Uh, sorry," Cisco apologizes, ducking his head and shooting Harrison a guilty look. "Didn't mean to spoil it."

"Cisco, we aren't in one of your comics." Caitlin gives her colleague one of her trademark disapproving frowns. "What we are dealing with are no _superpowers_."

"I would call being able to run at the speed of a bullet a superpower," Cisco grumbles under his breath, but seems to decide that it is wiser to stay quiet for now when he gets a rather annoyed glare in response.

"What Mr. Ramon means to say, is," Harrison goes on as he notices Barry's increasingly confused expression, "that the explosion of the particle accelerator caused some fundamental changes to my physiology." He pauses for a second to put on his glasses again before he gives Barry a faint smile. "I seem to have gained some unusual abilities from the accident."

"Like the hulk," Cisco provides. Barry doesn't miss how gleeful he seems to be about this prospect. Then, the young scientist frowns as something occurres to him and he quickly adds. "He doesn't change, though. No growing into a big green rage-beast, so don't worry."

Again, both of his colleagues give Cisco a look that makes it clear that they are not particularly happy with his additional pieces of information, and, again, the young man ducks his head and mutters an apology.

"Y-you've g-got s-superp-powers f-from the accelerator explosion?" Barry tries not to sound as incredulous as this prospect makes him feels, briefly wondering whether his friends are currently pulling a prank on him. Out of the corner of his eyes he notices that Cisco beams at him for his choice of words while Harrison makes a face that makes it obvious what he thinks of that.

"Dr. Wells gained abilities that surpass any normal human's capabilities when it comes to certain activities, but we aren't completely sure whether this condition is stable or not," Caitlin explains in her employer's place. "We were able to gain a lot of information over the last couple of months but it is possible th-"

"M-months?!" Barry interrupts, the former panic that was been dimmed by the confusion over his partner's health coming back full force as he realizes that he must have been in a coma for a really long time. "I-I w-was in a c-coma f-for m-months?" He turns to Harrison with wide eyes. "H-how llong h-have I b-been out?"

This is just horrible! He had spent _months_ in a coma?!

Does he still have a job? And how are the other's doing? He thought it would have been a couple of weeks, not months! He doesn't feel like someone who spent months at a time being unconscious… not that he really knows anything about that from first-hand experience, but he is still aware that he should be in a way worse shape if that were really the case.

A hand cups his shoulder and helps him focus back on the present. Harrison meets his gaze with a forcibly calm expression, but Barry can still make out the concern shimmering below his cool veneer. "You've been in a coma for nine months."

That isn't possible…

"N-no," he protests weakly, not even sure why he does so as he knows that Harrison wouldn't lie to him and certainly not about something like that.

"Barry," the other man goes on with a sombre and clearly guilty look. "I'm so sorry."

There are probably hardly any people who count on ending up in a coma sometime during their life and Barry has certainly not been one of them. The concept of it alone is so strange and alien that he isn't sure how to grasp it, the notion that he could have missed nearly a whole year of his life is nearly ridiculous, and he can't help but feel somewhat frightened by it.

Even so, he can't feel any anger, especially towards Harrison.

Barry reaches up and covers the hand on his shoulder with his own.

"I'm g-glad you are alr-right," he tells him honestly, watching how the other man's expression seems to tighten for a moment before an unmistakable sense of relief overcomes it.

"Thank you." Harrison's voice is quiet but warm and he moves his hand, so that he can clasp Barry's. There is a persisting tension that stays with him, though, and the fondness in his eyes is all too quickly replaced by concern and guilt again. "I'm not sure whether I'm deserving of your forgiveness."

"It w-was an accident," Barry points out. He doesn't even want to imagine what the months since the accelerator explosion had to have been like for the other man. His dream went up in flames, quite literally so, and he probably doesn't have to deal with only a fallout from the science community alone, but also the anger of the Twins' residents as well. The repercussions of this accident must have to been enormous. Barry doesn't even want to think of how many people got hurt or might have even lost their lives, not to mention that Harrison hadn't gotten away unharmed either as it seems.

"It was," Harrison agrees wearily. "An accident that hurt dozens of people and cost Central City enough money that the council is probably still cursing the day they agreed to the construction of S.T.A.R. labs."

"Harrison," Barry starts, but the other man shakes his head, indicating that he still isn't finished. Reluctantly, he falls quiet again.

"There is more," his partner tells him, obvious in how reluctant he is to go on. "It seems that I'm not the only one who has been affected by the explosion of the particle accelerator."

"What?"

An unease settles over Barry as he has an inkling of what Harrison is talking about, a small voice in the back of his mind whispering to him that this would make sense, that it would explain why he feels so odd, so out of it, or why he isn't in pain from being bedridden for months. He can't help but shudder at the implication...

"We aren't certain to what an extent, but it has become apparent to us that you've been affected as well." Harrison gives his hand a slight squeeze and there is something intense to how he is looking at him now. "I promise you, I'll do everything I can to make sure that you will be fine, though."

For a horrible moment, _The Fly_ passes through Barry's mind, along with many, _many_ more Horror movies in which scientific accidents caused a poor soul to turn into a horrendous and possibly mindless monster over time before being put down in the end.

And here he thought he had things to worry about before...

"H-how have I b-been affected?" He returns his attention to Harrison, trying to not let the fear that is currently coiling up into a painful knot at the bottom of his stomach show. "I'm not d-dangerous, are I?"

Something flickers over the other man's face, an expression that is too quickly gone for Barry to really pick up on. Surprise? Amusement? Fondness?

Probably not. He doubts that Harrison finds any of this amusing.

"I can assure you that you are no more a danger to others than any other person in the city is." Harrison squeezes his hand once more, but before he can go on, the noise of a door being opened and footstep coming their way from the hallway outside the lab causes him to stop.

"You guys better decide to change the damn music very soon because I'm not sitting through another hour of some European musician's racket whose ass has been dead for more than two centuries," announces Lisa even before she has reached the entrance. "I'd even prefer the Gaga chick over-"

The blond woman breaks off as soon as she comes within view of them and for a second her jaw seems to go slack as she stares at the tableau in front of her.

Barry feels his heart beating against his chest. There is no way to express how good it is to actually see with his own two eyes that his friend is really alright.

"L-Lisa…"

Her expression is one of disbelief but also relief that mirrors his own and, before he can even utter another word, she crosses the room with such an impressive speed that Barry wonders whether she too has been affected by the accelerator explosion.

"Fuck," she hisses, her arms now firmly around him, pressing a kiss against his cheek before burying her face in the crook of his neck. Her fingers dig painfully into the muscles of his back but he doesn't protest and instead returns the hug.

"Fuck," she repeats, her voice muffled against his skin. "You stupid bastard, I thought you'd end up as a damn vegetable." She pulls back and glares at him angrily. "I thought you'd die!"

There are tears in her eyes and Barry feels humbled once again by how much he means to her, no matter how obvious it should be by now. The notion that anybody could feel this deeply for him is still hard to believe, even after all these years.

"I'm s-sorry," he tells her and he really means it. He never meant to cause her such worries, neither her nor anybody else. "I'm g-glad you're f-fine."

For a second, Lisa seems like her face is actually going to crumble and she'll start to cry, which is both alarming and quite unsettling to Barry as he hates to see other people like that. She is able to get a grip of her emotions again, though, and just gives him another half-hearted glare in response.

"You're such a dunce, Bar." She huffs before she pulls him into another hug. Her breath is warm against his ear as she whispers, "And I'm also glad that you're alright."

He closes his eyes and rests his cheek against her head, glad to have her here. Lisa tends to call him a cuddler, which is a bit funny as he usually doesn't really like any extensive physical contact with people, but it has always been different with her.

It isn't just that she is a woman and that his apprehension to get close to others is the worst with other men, but there's something else to her, a feeling of being safe as, sometime into their early friendship, after she realized what had happened to him, she told him outright that she would kick any asshole's face in if they should so stupid as to try something like that with him again. And, even though she probably weighs around 40 pounds less than him, he has never doubt that she would actually do this.

Barry would never tell her this as he doesn't want to pull her wrath onto himself, but he often imagines that having a mother would probably feel a lot like this.

Thus, it feels like too soon when Lisa pulls back again and starts to eye him with a scrutinizing expression.

"How're you feeling?" she asks, frowning. "You look a bit pale but not too bad off, definitely not with the fricking six-pack you're showing."

Barry returns her frown, confused by what she is talking about, and looks down at himself. It is then that he realizes that he is topless and for a second he is actually paralyzed by the sheer mortification that hits him. His face is burning when he grabs his covers and pulls them up to his chin.

It feels much too crowded in here all of a sudden.

"Oh my god, could you please stop being such a prude?" Lisa rolls her eyes, but there is an amused twinkle in them and Barry can't help but glare at her for it. This is certainly not funny and she knows it!

"C-c-can I h-have a sh-shirt?" he asks, trying not to let his gaze wander from his friend to the other people present.

"Sure," Cisco pipes up. "I'll grab you one of our S.T.A.R. lab merchandise shirts. We're kind of stuck with them now that people have decided that we are more or less the devil's henchman."

With that, the younger man leaves the room, missing the unhappy face Caitlin makes in response to his remark.

Barry doesn't and neither does Lisa, who, much to his surprise and concern, gives the other woman a hard look. She doesn't say anything, though, and he is just about to ask her what this is about when he remembers the odd remark she'd made just a moment ago.

Pulling the blanket back a bit and glancing down at himself, he feels like someone is emptying a bucket of ice water over his head.

He gasps.

There are indeed toned muscles where none were before, but while this revelation is quite mindblowing on its own, it isn't what really causes him to freeze with a mixture of confusion and shock.

His scars are gone.

All of them.

What the…?

He glances over his shoulder to his back, finding nothing but smooth skin there too, and for a horribly long moment he is certain that this can't be real because this isn't his body. This can't be his body…

"Barry." Harrison is there again, then, next to Lisa, who, as Barry notices, gives the scientist a look that makes it clear that her opinion of him hasn't exactly developed in his favour over the last nine months. The other man either doesn't notice it or prefers to ignore it as he goes on. "I know that you're confused and scared by all of this, but I can assure you that you're fine, your body–"

"He was hit by lightning," hisses the blond woman next to Harrison, eyeing the man with a kind of anger that takes Barry slightly aback. "By lightening that was caused by _your_ stupid invention, because you messed up some calculation. It did something to him neither you nor your little minions are able to explain, so don't give him that shit that he's fine!"

A tense silence follows as Lisa glares at Harrison as if to dare him to try and say otherwise. The moment passes quickly though, and it seems that she realizes that it probably wasn't the best idea to have this little outburst in front of Barry as she briefly tenses up before she shoots him a worried glance.

The smile she gives him as she turns back to him is probably meant to be cheerful and reassuring but doesn't do a good job to hide her worry.

"Well, you haven't turned into a human-fly hybrid so far, so that is something, at least."

Barry nods, feelings slightly sick to the stomach, and is immensely glad when Cisco chooses this moment to return with a hoody in his hands.

"I think that one should fit you," the young scientist tells him as he hands him a black long-sleeved shirt. Barry gives him a tight smile and grateful nod as he accepts it.

"Everything alright?" Cisco asks as the tension in the room isn't lost on him and he glances at them all with a lifted eyebrow. "Did I miss something?"

"Everything is fine, Mr. Ramon," Harrison answers. Barry doesn't miss the tightness around the corner of his mouth or how weary he is looking again. "I think we should give Barry and Ms. Snart some time to catch up, though."

"I need to examine him first," Caitlin disagrees, stepping closer to them with a very no-nonsense expression that clearly won't allow for any protest. "After being in a coma for so long, it would be careless to not at least make sure that his really is alright."

That is not a process Barry is looking forward to, but, to his surprise and disappointment, Lisa immediately agrees.

"Definitely, I don't want him to pull such a stupid stunt on me again anytime soon," she tells the other woman seriously and turns back to Barry before he has any time to protest – he didn't actually _choose_ to fall into a coma, after all. "I'll call the others and tell them that you're conscious again, okay? So make sure that you're fine because there is a lot of hugging and soppiness coming your way, especially when it comes to the West girl. She is horrible at keeping it together." Lisa makes a disgruntled noise at that and it is quite hard for Barry to not point out that she has been rather emotional before as well.

Seeing that he doesn't want to get on his friend's bad side so quickly, he decides to stay quiet, even though he isn't sure how he feels about seeing the others right now.

It is obvious that something has happened to him and this leaves him feeling unsettled and apprehensive, probably not the best state of mind to be in for such a reunion. He wonders whether Lisa knows about this or Iris and Joe for that matter.

Well, Lisa has definitely picked up on the fact that something going on. She knows about his scars, not to mention how hard it is to miss that he hardly looks like someone who should've been in a coma for months on end…

Barry tenses up when someone steps closer to him again, causing him to turn his attention back to the here and now. It is Harrison, who meets his eyes with a calm look and cups the back of his neck once more in this intimate way of his that causes his cheeks to burn as Lisa is standing right there next to them. All the same, the gesture causes some of the tension to leave him.

"Maybe it's a good idea for you to get your mind on something else for a bit. We can talk about everything later," Harrison suggests, and then in a reassuring tone when he notices that Barry is still looking quite unconvinced, "You'll be alright, we'll make sure of that, Barry. I won't let anything else happen to you."

Something intense flashes through the other man's eyes as he says this, and Barry has the oddest sensation, as if something was briefly pulling at the back of his mind. It isn't a painful emotion but… it's still quite unsettling.

"Is he allowed to eat pizza?" Lisa asks Caitlin, causing Barry to shake the odd feeling off before turning to her. "And ice-cream? What about coke? That's alright?"

Judging by the young doctor's frown, Caitlin doesn't think so, but Harrison agrees to it before she can protest.

"That should be fine, Ms. Snart, as long as you keep in mind that he just woke up and still needs his rest."

Barry doesn't feel much like resting but he keeps quiet as he doesn't feel like leaving either. He hardly notices how Harrison and Lisa keep silently giving each other the evil eye treatment as he lets his right hand move over his stomach, where the alien sensation of muscles nearly causes him to shudder. His fingers brush over his side then, where the familiar feeling of scar tissue is completely absence. He isn't sure what to think of that or how to feel about it.

It is so strange, like being himself, but not entirely…

Barry doesn't protest when Caitlin shoos both Lisa and Harrison away to start with her examination, and he is just glad that he has something else to concentrate on now.

He is still grateful when Harrison keeps close throughout the procedure, though, a bit like a soothing presence in the back of mind...

Nine Months Lost Part I

I really want to thank my marvellous beta ladyofpride, who edited this in record time and is seriously just the best kind of beta one can wish for! :)

She's also a really kickass author, so if you want to find really well written stories, go read her stuff she's here on ao3.

But, for now, please enjoy the chapter! :D

I hope you've enjoyed the chapter! :)

It certainly too me a while to get it to you and I really want to apologize for the long break. I didn't intend for it to take this long to write it but for some reason it was quite difficult for me to write this one and I had to go over it and change it a couple of times before I was satisfied enough to want it to upload.

Hopefulle the next one won't take this long! I'll certainly do my best to get it to you quicker! ;)

Also, a huge thank you and hugs to all of you lovelies who left me feedback, every single one of those means so much to me and I really appreciate for you to take the time to do so! :D


	21. Nine Months Lost Part II

The quiet and calm down here in the abandoned particle accelerator is a welcome change to how crazy the last couple of hours have been after Iris and Joe passed by and Lisa made true on her word to turn their little reunion into a pizza party.

Cisco pulled up some music, and while Caitlin complained that Barry still needed to rest and that there were some tests she had to perform before he could eat anything, she relented in the end when Lisa complained about her always being such a sourpuss.

It was a bit odd to see Lisa, Iris, and Joe interact with the two young scientists in such a familiar way and it quickly became apparent to Barry that these people knew each other quite well.

Well, nine months were a long time for people to get to know each other…

Barry frowns down into the darkness below the small platform he is currently sitting on.

None of the regular lights are on he has seen the last couple of times he has been down here before, just a handful of the emergency ones break the dark every few dozen feet giving the area around him a somewhat eerie glow. He can hardly make out anything outside any of the small beams of light below, but even though this place is cold and dark, he doesn't feel like getting up and leaving.

Here, in this broken dream of a better future, he can hide away and try not to think of what he's learned from Harrison, Cisco, and Caitlin after Lisa, Iris and Joe left shortly before ten tonight. They promised to come by tomorrow again and, if the tests should show no signs that there is something to worry, pick him up and get him home.

… or to Lisa's place as he no longer has an apartment.

He certainly can't hold it against his landlady. It's only natural that she would want to rent the place to someone who is actually able to pay for living there… or someone who actually does live there. Damn, this sucks.

Barry sighs, which sounds unusually loud in the silence around him, and rests his forehead against the railing of the platform. The cold is a nice change considering how unbearably warm he's been feeling since waking up. It's probably just another side-effect of what happened to him and likely is still happening to him, although it still has him worried. With his luck, he would develop a fixation with bright lights very soon…

Lisa would certainly find that hilarious considering how much she loves how unsettled he got after watching that old stupid horror flick…

At least not all is doom and gloom, though.

Joe told him that he still has a job which is incredibly reassuring to know. He wouldn't have expected the CCPD to keep his positon vacant for nearly a year though he is pretty sure that it is likely more due to them considering not to re-fill the post at all due to the numerous financial cuts the department has had to deal with over the last two years.

Having Joe and Iris around was a very nice experience in itself as they made it very clear how worried they were and how glad they are that he has woken up and is doing, at least seemingly, well again.

The silence around him is suddenly broken by the noise of the door behind him being opened. It's not one of the big electrical ones as the main current supply is either damaged or purposefully turned off around here, and while the area directly outside the particle accelerator is hardly lit either, the light coming from the hallway is still bright enough that it blinds him for a second.

"You've found yourself quite a cozy spot here. Very calm." Harrison's voice is low and warm and it eases some of Barry's tension away.

"S-sorry," he apologizes, more out of reflex than him being really worried that the other man could be annoyed about his little trip down here as he doesn't sound angry. Barry shifts his body a bit, so that he leans against one of the steel rods of the railing and is able to take a better look at the other man. "I c-couldn't sleep."

Harrison hums in understanding and walks over to him, letting the door close behind him as he does so. The room is shrouded in darkness once again.

Barry watches him quietly as he takes a seat next to him. He leaves enough space between them to not make him feel uncomfortable before he too lets his legs dangle over the side of the platform like Barry does with his own.

Harrison looks around the surrounding darkness for a long moment, and while Barry can't make his features out in the dim light very well, he doesn't doubt that he would see the same grim worried expression on Harrison's face that the other man has been sporting over the course of this afternoon and evening whenever he thought nobody was watching him.

They are currently the only ones still at S.T.A.R. labs. Caitlin and Cisco left shortly after the others did and the notion that nobody else is currently around is quite a bit odd because Barry has never been in this building with not at least a handful of scientists and security guards muddling around. It causes the place to feel much bigger and much emptier than before and he wonders whether this is the same for Harrison and the others and how daunting this has to be for them.

He can't say for sure, as he hasn't really caught up on much that has happened after that night the particle accelerator exploded, but he's pretty sure that Harrison isn't anybody's favorite person anymore - and probably, by association, neither are Cisco or Caitlin or anybody else that was involved in the particle accelerator. It is a troubling thought and causes a heavy worry to settle over him.

"Are y-you okay?" His voice sounds loud in the silence despite how subdued it really is. It seems to startle Harrison out of his thoughts and the other man turns his head to look at him.

There's a brief pause in which Barry can literally feel his eyes boring into him and it suddenly hits him how physically close they are and that they are the only two people present in at least a mile's radius.

"Yes," Harrison finally answers quietly. "As alright as one can be in this situation."

His words seem to hang in the air for a long moment afterwards, and Barry doesn't miss how weary he sounds.

"How are you?" The man next to him asks in return. "You had a lot to take in in just a couple of hours."

That certainly is an understatement.

Learning that he seems to have been altered on a molecular level due to black matter, electricity, and who knows what else, is pretty daunting thing to swallow, especially because no one can tell him what exactly he can expect from all these physiological changes—

"_Your metabolism has sped up impressively, as has the regeneration time of your cells," Caitlin explained to him when he asked her about his missing scars a while after Lisa and the others had left. He didn't miss how pinched her mouth looked or the concerned expression that was in her eyes, and he was glad when she didn't ask about where he got them, even though it had obviously been on her mind. "You're like a real-life version of Wolverine, dude," Cisco piped in and either didn't notice or ignored the annoyed expression of his colleague. "We don't know how fast you can heal or the extent to which your new healing factors work, but it can very well be that you'll just re-grow your limbs in case you lose them." _

The notion of losing his limbs certainly was and still is a bit unsettling and he only half-listened when Cisco went on about to talk about how his powers could be also similar to Heroes' Clair Bennet's in case he should lack any heightened senses…

"I'm… fine, I th-think," Barry replies somewhat hesitantly. "Just a bit overw-whelmed."

Harrison chuckles next to him. It's a deep and pleasant sound.

"Considering the circumstances, I would say that that's a perfectly normal reaction," he says with an audible smile in his voice, and Barry can't help but notice how nice it is to have a moment alone with Harrison after how crowded he's been all afternoon and evening.

"I c-could have it w-worse," he remarks with a faint smile. "I could have started to turn into a human-fly hybrid."

"You really don't like that movie, do you?" Harrison inquires, obviously amused by his aversion to that classic horror film.

"It's just g-gross," he points out, making a disgusted face. "Es-specially the sequel."

"Good thing then that no insects were close to you when-"

The other man breaks off abruptly, and before another silence could settle between them, probably a much less pleasant one, Barry interjects.

"It w-was an accident," he reminds him quietly. "You d-didn't mean to hurt anyb-body, Harrison."

"And I still ended up killing dozens of people and putting you in a coma for nearly a year." He sounds wary and guilty and Barry feels so bad for him because none of this was supposed to happen. The particle accelerator was meant to be a good thing, a great thing everybody could benefit from.

"You and the oth-thers w-worked so hard on th-this project f-for years, y-you did everything you c-could to make it s-safe."

"It clearly wasn't enough, though."

Barry isn't sure how to reply to that as he very much gets how Harrison feels. He too would be devastated if their roles were reversed. From what he's learned so far, the explosion of the accelerator was nothing short of a tragic accident and there is probably nothing he can say to make the other man feel any less guilty about it.

"I'm sorry." Harrison breaks the silence that has started to settle between them once more. "I don't mean to be so bitter, I know that it won't change a thing, and I know that I'm actually truly lucky in the end, no matter how undeserving I am of it."

Slowly, as if to give Barry time to pull away, he reaches for him and tentatively cups his neck before continuing in a very low but warm voice, "I could have lost you as well."

Barry blushes, feeling a faint tingling sensation where Harrison is touching him.

"I'm still here," he agrees just as quietly while his heart seems to hammer against his chest because he notices how the other man moves closer and starts to lean towards him. The hand on his neck urges him slightly on to do so as well and Barry realizes that he is going to be _kissed_ –

The strangest sensation overcomes him then, and it feels like his whole body is shivering, like it is trembling really badly. For a split-second he actually thinks that it must be the platform, that it is maybe an earthquake, before he realizes that it is _him_, and before he can really think about it, he scrambles away from Harrison and onto his feet.

Then, he suddenly collides with the door behind them, hitting his back and his head hard enough on it that he cries out due to both the pain and the surprise.

From the spot he has just been sitting the exit isn't all that far away, but he still couldn't have stumbled back against it this quickly and that revelation freaks him out to no end. He can still remember Caitlin's words from earlier—that they couldn't be sure just now about the entirely of the effects the explosion would have on him and his body.

Harrison is on his side just a second later, but Barry pulls away when he tries to reach for him again.

"D-don't!" He is shaking again, _trembling_, not like a leaf but more like a whole goddamn tree during a magnitude ten earthquake. It causes his voice to sound alien, distorted, which only scares him even more because _what the hell is happening_ to him?!

"Calm down, Barry," Harrison speaks in a calm voice and makes a shushing noise when Barry seems to grow even more agitated as soon as he realizes that he can't do so. "Just breathe, you're completely fine. Nothing is going to happen to you, you just need to relax."

Barry tries to pull back when Harrison reaches for him again to cup his neck, but the door is to his back, and he can't get any more distance between them.

"Don't!" he repeats, frustrated because he doesn't want to _hurt_ him.

"Everything is alright," Harrison repeats in the same low and comforting voice, moving even closer as he does so, until their noses are nearly touching, until Barry can feel Harrison's breath on his skin. "You won't hurt me or anybody else. You're not a threat, Barry, you're just vibrating, nothing more."

_Vibrating_?!

What the hell…

Then Harrison leans a bit more in, so that his forehead is resting on Barry's, and he asks him to close his eyes and just to concentrate on breathing. "Listen to my breath, to how I breathe in and out, slow and deep. Can you do that for me?"

Barry makes a small scared noise which initially was supposed to be a protest but relents as there aren't many other options for him at hand. Besides, just having the other man this close makes him feel better already.

He tries to mimic Harrison's breathing which is way harder than it has any right to be, as it feels like something is pressing down on his chest, constricting his ribcage so much that it is hard to take anything but shallow breaths.

Over what feels like a small eternity but probably is nothing more than a few minutes, he starts to feel like there is just the two of them, like there is nothing else but them and the silent darkness around them, which becomes like a cocoon, shielding them from whatever lies outside this small refuge.

"Good." Harrison squeezes his neck slightly, and Barry can feel his warm breath against his lips. "Very good, you're doing great."

He realizes then that he has stopped trembling and that he feels utterly spent.

He also realizes how close he is to Harrison, and he can't help but tense up in response.

Harrison picks up on it of course, because this man is nothing if not observant, and let go of his neck. He steps back, giving him more space, which makes it a bit easier to breathe and causes Barry to feels a familiar sense of guilt nestle in his guts because he doesn't want to make him feel rejected, especially not after how he's just helped him…

"Are you feeling better?"

"Y-yes," Barry answers which isn't exactly the truth as he feels many things right now but better isn't exactly what he would call any of them. He doesn't want to worry Harrison any more than he has already, though. "C-can w-we go ups-stairs? I'm p-pretty exhausted."

"Of course," Harrison agrees readily and adds, because he doesn't seem to miss how heavily Barry is leaning against the door behind him now. "Do you think you can walk on your own or do you want me to help you?"

"I'm fine," Barry assures him with a tired but grateful smile.

The way back to the main lab where his bed is, takes quite a bit longer than it took him to get down here, as they have to use the stairs from the base level where the particle accelerator is to the third level above where the elevators start to work again.

Barry is so exhausted when they are finally in sight of the laboratory entrance that he nearly groans in relief. All his limbs feel like they are actually made of lead and he's hungry – _really_ hungry. Whereas his appetite has been next to non-existent before when Lisa ordered the pizzas, he feels ravished right now and he wonders whether he could ask Harrison to get him something to eat—

His track of thoughts come to a sudden stop when he sees Lisa suddenly exiting the lab about ten feet in front of them. There is a deeply concerned frown on her face that lightens a bit as soon as her gaze falls on him.

"L-Lisa?" He utters in surprise as he hadn't expected to see his friend before tomorrow again. "What are y-you doing here?"

"Yes, Ms. Snart, that's quite a valid question, isn't it?" Harrison sounds slightly annoyed and meets the blond woman's dark look with a grim frown. "I've pointed out to you already a number of times that I don't take too kindly to you breaking into my facility after dark."

"Oh please." Lisa huffs, rolling her eyes. "Because you really believed that I would leave Barry alone in this creepy place all by himself after he's just woken up?"

"It's not creepy," Barry points out, but before he can say anything else two more people enter the hallway from the laboratory Lisa has just exited, and his worry about any possibly bad blood between his friend and Harrison is gone as soon as his gaze falls upon them.

"Len? M-Mick?" he asks and both surprise and joy flood him over seeing his friends - at least, until it hits him that they, two rather notorious criminals, have broken into Harrison's facility…

… now he feels like he's about to be sick.

"Wh-what are you d-doing here?" He hisses before he throws Harrison a worried glance.

"Nice to see you too, brat." Len gives him an amused smile before he struts over to them as if he hasn't gotten himself into a situation that could have really dire consequences for him and Mick.

"Y-you're n-not sup-posed to be here," Barry reminds him in exasperation, and he can't help but feel a familiar frustration overcome him due to how damn careless the other man can be at times.

"Don't worry." Len turns to face Harrison then and while the smile stays on this lips, the expression loses all of its warmth. It is replaced by something cold and hard as he goes on. "We've something of an understanding with Wells here."

"Not if you continue to break into S.T.A.R. laboratories like this," Harrison replies firmly. There is a note of anger to his words that is unusual for the otherwise mostly calm and collected man. "I told you that you've to stick to the rules for this little arrangement to work, Mr. Snart."

Len chuckles and aches an eyebrow. "You're in way less of a good mood than I would've expected, considering that Barry has finally woken up after being a coma for nearly a year. Which, as we both know, has been utterly due to your and your people's incompetence."

"Len!" Barry gives the other man a waring glare before he turns to Harrison who has visibly tensed up due to Len's words. His lips are pursed in obvious anger, and he looks ready to either kick the others out, call the cops on them, or maybe both. "P-please, th-they'll leave-"

"Like hell we will," Lisa interrupts him firmly, crossing her arms in front of her chest in a very familiar defiant manner. "He has no fucking right to kick us out."

"It's h-his p-property," Barry points out with growing exasperation because his friends are clearly taking this situation nor serious enough.

"It's public property," Len disagrees with a shrug and Barry decides then and there that he is going to start hitting his head against the wall any moment now if they insist on being so damn difficult on purpose.

Why can't they see what kind of trouble they are getting themselves into?!

"It's alright, Barry." Harrison's voice causes him to look back to the other man who still looks grim but no longer angry. "I suppose your friends do have a point." He turns to face Barry and gives him a faint smile. "And I'm quite certain that you would enjoy having them around for a bit as well."

Some of Barry's worry is replaced by surprise as he hasn't expected Harrison to react like this to having criminals breaking into his facility.

Then, Lisa's and Len's words from before come back to him and he can't believe that he hasn't picked up on this sooner. He frowns and looks between his friends and Harrison with a confused expression. "W-wait, you kn-know each other?"

When did that happen?

… ah, right, probably sometime during the last nine months during which he's been unconscious.

"Of course, our _devotion_ to you has brought us together," Lisa tells him with an amused wink, before she steps closer to him and pulls him into another hug. "God, you've no idea how good it is to see you on your own two legs again, Bear."

After a moment, as the sudden contact has taken him by surprise, Barry returns the hug, glad to have his friend here as well.

It hits him how lucky he is to have them in his life, then. If he and Lisa hadn't met that night in the old trailer park, it's more than unlikely that they would never have ended up being friends, and he would never have met Len or Mick.

It's so odd how life works out sometimes…

"Wh-why is M-Mick here, then?" Barry quips up and glances over at the tall man, who has kept some distance between them.

"Asking myself the same question, bean-pole." Mick grunts, arms crossed in front of his broad chest and looking about uninviting to the world around him as ever, at least, until he cracks a smirk. "Good to know you didn't really turn into a vegetable, though."

Barry grins and turns to Lisa before he mock-whispers to her. "He really loves me."

"He _adores_ you," the blond woman agrees readily, which causes him to chuckle.

It's so damn nice having them here. He's been so worried about them after he woke up due to learning what's happened to the Twins after the accelerator explosion and even with Lisa assuring him that everybody is doing well, he still had doubts about her just trying to not bother him with any more things to take in and worry about.

And seeing the relief in his friends' eyes, he doesn't need it spelled out to him to know that he is just as much of family to them as they are to him.

"Who wouldn't," Lisa goes on. "You're just _adorable_."

Barry protests when she actually pinches his cheek and pushes her hand away laughing. "D-don't, you're like those horrible old ladies all ch-children fear."

"You mean a witch?" Mick asks, looking quite pleased with himself when Lisa flips him off.

"Hardy-har, Mr. _Ugly_. At least nobody confuses me as an _ogre_." She glares at the tall man before she turns her attention back to Barry, frowning slightly. "You don't look so hot, though, Bear. Are you feeling alright?"

Her words give Barry pause as he realizes that meeting his friends has actually let him forget for a moment how weary he really feels.

"He just needs something to eat," Harrison informs her calmly before he meets Barry's slightly worried gaze with a tight but not unkind smile that alludes to the fact that he's probably still not all that happy about having Barry's friends here this late at night.

"You've eaten next to nothing before," Lisa chides. "Your blood sugar is probably down."

"Sorry," he murmurs and realizes that he really doesn't want to stand here in the hallway anymore as his legs start to feel like they won't bear his weight for much longer.

"Come." Harrison steps closer to him and takes one of his arms in a very tentative grip. "Let's get you to bed and worry about feeding you afterwards, alright?"

The touch is warm and surprisingly comforting, and Barry agrees with a nod, glad to have the other man at his side to help him.

The others follow as well, and it is an immense relief when Barry is able to get off his feet again just a few moments later. His head starts to spin as soon as it touches the pillow, though, and he has to close his eyes which only makes the sensation even worse.

"He doesn't look so good," Lisa remarks next to him with audible worry in her voice. He turns his face into the gentle touch when she cups his cheek. "Why the heck did you let him get up when he should clearly be resting?"

The sharp words are undoubtedly directed towards Harrison, and Barry wants to protest and explain that this was all his doing, but when he tries to say so only a soft groan escapes him.

He starts to feel sick, _really_ sick…

Someone else touches his wrist, but as he tenses up in response, Len makes a low calming noise and asks him to stay relaxed.

"His blood pressure is low," the other man remarks after another moment.

Great…

Barry huffs in frustration, eyes still closed, and frowns when Lisa chuckles in return with her hand still on his cheek. "Poor baby, you're really never getting a break, do you?"

"'s not f-funny," he grumbles, making a small protesting noise when Len suddenly let go of his wrist. He immediately feels stupid for it, but he can't help but miss the comforting contact.

"It's alright, Barry." Harrison has taken up the spot next to him where Len had just been a minute ago and gives his arm a reassuring squeeze, before he takes hold of Barry's hand. "I'll give you an IV, you'll start to feel better very soon."

Barry shudders when something cool and wet touches the back of his hand. A second later the familiar stinging smell of sanitizer hits his nose.

He scrunches up his face, feeling incredibly sick all of a sudden and turns away to face Lisa who is still standing beside him.

"Shhh, you're not scared of needles all of a sudden, are you?" she jests. He says nothing, choosing instead to press his cheek more firmly against her warm soft palm.

He squeezes his eyes shut as the world spins around him, and if this wasn't going to stop soon, he would throw up for sure…

Then suddenly, there is the brief sharp stinging sensation when the needle of the IV pierces his skin which causes him to hiss in discomfort. Harrison makes a small soothing noise.

"All done," he tells Barry as he fixes the IV onto the back of his hand with some medical tape. "You'll feel much better in just a moment."

A familiar burning sensation spreads out from where the IV is fixed to his hand as the drip starts to work. He lets out a small groan, not so much due to the slight discomfort but due to relief as the spinning sensation has already started abates.

"You're as white as a sheet," Lisa says quietly a moment later and brushes her fingers through his hair. "You always have to be the center of attention, don't you?"

Barry chuckles, opening one eye slightly to peek up at her. It's good that he can actually focus on her without much trouble.

"He's always been a little drama queen," Mick remarks from somewhere above his head, and Barry cranes his neck to glance over to him. His friend gives him an amused smirk as he goes on. "You've really expected that would have changed all of a sudden?"

"Don't be an ass." Lisa gives her friend an annoyed frown before she looks back down to Barry and smiles. "You can be as much of a little drama queen as you want, Bear, you definitely have the right to whine after what happened to you."

"Don't encourage him." Len snorts, grinning when Barry shoots him a glare in reply.

"Stop being mean to him, both of you," Lisa orders sternly before she cracks a smile and winks down at him. "You know those two meatheads, just ignore them, that's what I usually do."

"You've really so little love left for your big brother, sis?" Len asks with a chuckle which gets him a clearly unimpressed look from Lisa.

"Maybe you'd get some more if you'd stop being such an annoying twerp all the time, Lenny," she replies, and Barry smiles as he listens to them start a very familiar banter. He moves his eyes from Len to Harrison who is standing next to them and watching the unexpected visitors with an expression Barry can't quite interpret.

A slight uneasiness overcomes him when he realizes that it is very possible and very likely that the other man still isn't exactly happy about this late night disturbance.

As if he'd felt his gaze, Harrison turns to him and meets his gaze. Just as suddenly, the somber and thoughtful expression is replaced by a warmer one.

"You want me to get you some of the left-overs from before?" he asks Barry with a kind smile. "I will order some more afterwards. Would you like to get something from _Shalimar_? You seemed fond of their _Bhelpuri_ the last time we went there."

It takes Barry a moment to remember the Indian restaurant they've visited a couple of times so far. The last time was just a few days before the particle accelerator was supposed to be started…

"What's _Bhelpuri_?" Mick makes it sound like the name of the dish alone is gross which causes both Lisa and Barry to shoot the man an annoyed look.

"An Ind-dian restaurant we've been to b-before," Barry explains before returning his gaze to Harrison. "It's r-really good and I w-would l-love some B-Bhelpuri."

Some of the tension seems to leave the doctor at that, and Barry can't help but be pleased when Harrison reaches for his wrist to give it a gentle squeeze. "Good, I'll make sure to order enough that you'll get full."

It's a bit of a funny thing to say and it has Barry wondering how ravenous he must appear to the other man to make Harrison think he would need to order extra for him. Although, if he was completely honest, he genuinely feels as though he could eat at least two portions for sure. Just thinking of food makes his mouth water…

"C-could you maybe order a p-portion of _V-Vada_ as w-well? And a _K-Kulfi_?" he adds just as the other man is about to turn away and leave the lab. Harrison seems amused by his request but not at all surprised.

"Of course," he assures him. "Just rest."

With that, Harrison leaves, and Barry doesn't miss the brief look he exchanges with Len before he disappears. It is tense, nearly hostile, and he suddenly worries all over again about his friends having turned up here unexpectedly in the middle of the night.

"Stop worrying your head off." Len's voice causes him to look back to his friend who retakes the spot to his right. "Wells won't sic the cops on us. He's had more than enough opportunities to do so far and he never has."

The brief exchange between Harrison and Len from before comes to his mind then and causes Barry to frown in confusion.

"Y-you've r-really been here before?" he asks quietly.

"Of course." Len chuckles and seems honestly bemused by his question. "You think we'd leave you in the hands of some crazy scientist who blew up nearly half of Central City without knowing what he's up to?" His friend meets his surprised expression with a smirk and aches an eyebrow. "You should know better by now, kid."

Barry smiles faintly and closes his eyes, knowing Len is right, he should have known better by now. Even with no blood relations between them, he is just as much family to them as they are to him and he wouldn't have been able to stay away from them either had their roles been reversed.

"You're so s-stupid," he mutters. "Do y-you even r-realize in what k-kind of trouble you c-could have gotten yourself int-to?"

A hand touches his wrist, just a bit above where the butterfly needle is connected to him, and he opens his eyes a crack to see Len who stands closer now with a relaxed and warm expression on his face he usually never displays with anybody other than Barry, Lisa, and Mick.

"You're one to talk, brat," his friend points out. "There's probably nothing more stupid than getting yourself struck by a bolt of lightning while at work."

"B-because th-that w-was my fault." Barry rolls his eyes but grins faintly, glad to have the other man at his side. "A-nd d-do I have t-to remind you that y-you g-get yourself k-killed nearly every t-time you p-pull one of your d-dumb jobs?"

"Comes with the business." Len shrugs, giving Barry's wrist a slight squeeze. "Not to mention, I'm probably the best in this field of work."

"My, how modest you are." Lisa snorts, shoots her brother an amused look.

"W-well, he d-does have M-Mick with him as w-well," Barry remarks and grins when Len frowns at him with a fake annoyed expression. "H-he's l-looking out for you, s-so d-don't be mean."

"You hear that, Snart? The kid got it right," Mick agrees readily with an amused smirk from where he is currently leaning against one of the consoles nearby.

"If by '_looking out for me_' you really mean forcing me to keep an eye on this idiot to prevent him from burning down _every_ building we enter, then sure, he's my damn _guardian angel_," Len replies drily, which causes Mick to bark a laugh and point out. "Your life would be so fuckin' boring without me, jackass, so keep your mouth shut."

"Let's just agree on the fact that you're both unreliable and reckless idiots, okay?" Lisa interrupts before her brother can make his retort. She turns to Barry and gives him a fond smile while brushing the hair from his forehead. "You're feeling better already, Bear?"

"Much," Barry agrees but doesn't point out that it is only partly due to the drip and mostly due to having them around. He knows how well saying something like that would go over with Len and Mick being there to hear it.

It is still true, though, and while he enjoyed having both Iris and Joe visit him earlier as well, there is a closeness and trust to the relationship he shares with these three that he's never been able to reach with anybody else.

"Your boyfriend is playing nice, it seems," Lisa remarks suddenly, and Barry isn't sure what to make of it. She notices his expression and studies him as she continues. "You do know that our dear Dr. Wells could have returned within a minute or so already, don't you?"

He frowns.

It takes him a moment to realize what she's getting at.

"Y-you kn-know about his… p-powers?" he asks hesitantly and can't help but grimace at wording it like that because while Cisco may have a point comparing Harrison's new abilities to those of people in comic books, it still seems odd to him to call them that.

"You mean his super speed?" Len looks down at him with a smile that seems more grim than amused.

"It's hard to miss something like that if you're here nearly every day," Lisa adds, her expression turns slightly amused. "And Cisco definitely talks a lot when he's nervous."

Barry isn't sure what she means, which causes Lisa to chuckle and throw a long lock of hair back over her shoulder before giving him a clearly exaggerated seductive look. Her voice is deep and sultry as she goes on. "Our dear little Cisco seems to have a fancy for older and gorgeous blond women, it seems."

"I can see old and blond," Mick remarks as he eyes Lisa, "but I've no idea what you mean by gor-"

"Shut your ugly trap!" Lisa glares at the other man. "You wouldn't know gorgeous if it would bite you in the ass!"

Mick chuckles, clearly not in the least bit insulted, while Lisa turns back to Barry, now with a slightly pinched expression on her face.

"Cisco finds me irresistible," she tells him firmly, crossing her arms. "Any men with taste does."

"Lisa," Barry nearly whines, because now he can imagine just too well what must have happened to get the young scientist to let this information slip. "Y-you can't d-do that. C-Cisco is a nice g-guy and my f-friend-"

"He's better kept it at ogling you," Len interrupts, glaring warningly at his sister. It appears that at least part of this information is new to the other man as well. It causes Lisa to roll her eyes and gives him a rather disbelieving look.

"What the heck do you think of me? Of course nothing happened! I'm happy with Roscoe, thank you very much!"

Barry knows that this is hardly the lesser of two evils for Len, and he isn't surprised when his friend makes a face as if he had just bitten into a rotten apple.

It's his own fault, though, he should have seen it coming, and Barry seriously can't understand how Len is still not able to make his peace with his sister's choice of a partner after all these years. Not that he doesn't understand Len's dislike for the other man.

"Oh, by the way." Lisa looks back down to him. "Roscoe sends his greetings as well and hopes that you'll get well soon."

Somehow, Barry very much doubts that seeing as Dillon has started to project his dislike for Len onto him as well over the last couple of years. He doesn't have the heart to point this out to Lisa and instead gives her a faint smile. "Th-thanks."

Len snorts, making it clear that he shares his opinion on that matter, but before Lisa has the opportunity to defend her boyfriend, they are re-joined by Harrison, holding a plate with four microwaved slices of pizza. The smell of it causes Barry's stomach to rumble embarrassingly loud.

His cheeks turn warm when Lisa chuckles and ruffles his hairs in a fond gesture.

"Aw, someone is really hungry," she coos, chuckling when Barry swaps her hand away. "See, I told you to eat more than the couple of bites you did before. If you had you listened to me, you wouldn't nearly have fainted."

"I d-didn't faint." Barry gives her a dark glare.

"But you nearly did," Lisa argues, taking a seat on the edge of the bed next to him. "Does my delicate little flower need me to feed them or do you think you can hold the slices all on your own?"

Barry groans, growing even more mortified when he notices that Harrison actually seems amused by this.

"N-no, y-you can't f-find this funny, y-you're s-supposed to be on my t-team." He huffs in frustration.

"I didn't know that there are any teams," Harrison points out as he comes up to his side. The other man meets his gaze with a fond smile. "And don't ever worry about me not knowing how tough you really are."

These words cause a pleasant warmth to settle over Barry because he knows that Harrison really means it and he can't help but smile in response.

"God, you're so sappy." Lisa chuckles and smirks when Barry shoots her another glare. "I'm not saying he's wrong, though, am I?"

"You called me d-delicate," he points out still a bit miffed.

"Because you're my little brother, Bear," she explains with a roll of her eyes and an exasperated sigh. "You'll always be small and helpless to me, no matter what."

This causes him to pause and look at her in surprise.

Lisa hasn't called him her brother before, never directly at least, and while Barry knows how close they are, it's still odd how very much this touches something inside him, even though she probably is just trying to be funny now.

Family…

He swallows around the lump in his throat and watches how Lisa's amused expression changes when she picks up on how her choice of words have affected him. Her expression softens and for a moment she seems at a loss of what to say before she cups his left shoulder and laughs. "You're such a nitwit, Bear."

He chuckles as well and tries not to look at Len or anybody else as he averts his eyes, embarrassed but also happy.

This is nice, being surrounded by the people he loves, people he considers as his family and who actually return this sentiment.

Despite how unsettling and intimidating everything else in his life seems to be right now, he realizes that he still has this. Deep down he knows that things would turn out alright as long as he has them with him.

No matter what the future may hold for them, right now in this moment, Barry knows that together they are safe.


	22. Nine Months Lost Part III

"I can't wear this." Barry, who stuck his head out of the small trailer they're using as a sort of mobile headquarter on the old Ferris Air runway, is met with a round of surprised looks. Cisco, who is currently drinking one of his colorful slushies again, arches his eyebrows in confusion.

"Is it the wrong size?" the younger man asks, turning to Caitlin with an accusatory frown. "I told you it was too big."

Barry flushes in embarrassment and ducks his head as he listens to Caitlin rebuff her friend, telling him not to be silly.

"Don't be so self-conscious, Bear." Lisa gets up from the small camping seat she has been sitting on and waltzes over to him, a bemused—but also slightly exasperated—expression on her face. "You don't have to go shopping in it, you're just supposed to run a couple of circles around the area."

"I-it's too tight," he protests, lowering his eyes to the ground, feeling too embarrassed to meet anybody's gaze right now. His cheeks feel like they are going to get up in flames any second and he pulls the door a bit closer, as if it's some kind of shield he can hide behind. "C-can't I w-wear s-something a bit more… b-baggy?"

A brief moment of silence follows. The sound of cars passing by at the nearby highway suddenly seems rather loud.

"Dude," Cisco starts in an uncertain voice and exchanges a brief look with Caitlin before he goes on: "We want to see how fast you can go and the suit is designed that way to reduce friction."

"You really don't have to feel uncomfortable because of us," Caitlin adds. "This is a completely scientifically based experiment."

Barry starts to gnaw at his lower lip and frowns unhappily. If he had known that this little excursion to learn more about his newfound abilities would end in him having to run around in a skintight suit, he would have certainly never agreed to it.

Maybe it was a mistake to mention anything of what has happened at work at all… Maybe it will go away on its own and he is now bothering his friends for no reason _and_ making a complete fool of himself.

Yeah, that would just be his luck…

"Barry." Lisa huffs. He lifts his gaze again as she approaches. She doesn't seem really annoyed, though, because despite her frown there is a familiar small smile on her lips, the kind she usually gets when she thinks he's behaving in a completely stupid but understandable way. "You want to learn what is going on as well, don't you? You know that it's important that we find out whether or not anything is wrong with you."

"Y-you mean other th-than m-me t-turning into h-human sized _S-Speedy Gonzales_?" he asks, failing to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"You saved a man's life by being a human sized Speedy Gonzales," Lisa reminds him with a chuckle. "And you are much more adorable than that little rodent any day of the week."

"Lisa," he protests, ducking a bit more behind the door, but he can't stop himself from shooting a glance to where Harrison is currently sitting at the small camping table loaded up with a couple of laptops and other equipment. To his growing embarrassment, he notices that his partner actually seems rather amused by Lisa's words.

As if on a cue, Harrison gets up and walks over to him as well, stopping next to Lisa. Barry can't help but notice how tight the suit the man's own suit is. It still doesn't look as ridiculous as what Barry's supposed to wear, though, and much more like something you would imagine to find on a comic book hero. He has a strong inkling that this is probably due to Cisco's choice of design, even though his friend explained to him that it's a modification he came up to improve the protection of firefighters.

Why couldn't Barry wear something like that? It definitely has more layers, and while it still looks tight, he would prefer this over the thin material he is supposed to slip on no...

"Barry," Harrison says in the calm and soothing tone he's been using around Barry since he stumbled into S.T.A.R. labs earlier this afternoon. Barry has been rather upset, and, looking back on it, he feels so stupid for freaking out like this over what happened at the PD.

Maybe he blew what happened just completely out of proportion inside his mind and he's just remembering things wrong…

"If it makes you feel better," the other man continues, "then you can wear a jacket over it. While it might be somewhat big for you, there's one in my car that I can get for you."

That would be a godsend, Barry thinks, and so he nods quickly before Cisco can protest the influence the added article of clothing might have on measuring Barry's maximum speed.

His stomach does a small flip as he watches how Harrison suddenly vanishes for a second before returning with a dark running jacket in his right hand. Barry quickly takes it from him with a grateful smile.

"Thanks," He says, and he really means it, vanishing back into the trailer before anyone can say anything else.

As he changes out of his clothes and into Cisco's suit, he can't help but think back on how damn strange things had gotten in just the last couple of days.

… Well, _months _actually, everything considered, but Barry still tries not to think too much about _that_ little fact.

He should have stayed at the lab and let the others do more tests. It really would have been the more sensible thing to do. After hearing that his heartrate is now as fast as that of a hummingbird and about all the other things that seem to be normal for him but would be lethal or at least frownworthy for any other person – other than Harrison, as it has turns out – he just needed to get some distance between himself and this newfound craziness.

Neither of the three scientists were happy to let him go, but Harrison seemed to understand that he needed some time to digest all this information and suggested that they could continue with the tests the next day.

Not really knowing what to do, Barry's first visit outside S.T.A.R. Labs led him to Iris at Jitters, and it didn't take long for him to realize that there just wasn't something wrong with his heartrate when everything around them seemed to freeze as soon as he noticed how one of the waitresses stumbled, causing him to move before he could think. He decided to cut his visit short after that little incident and went on to the CCPD, which admittedly probably wasn't the best thing to do, but he needed something familiar and his work has always been at least some sort of safe haven for him.

Seeing all the familiar faces had been nice for the most part, with the exception of Rodriguez, who made some stupid comment about Barry using any opportunity to laze off. The man quickly vanished up into the laboratory again when Captain Singh came over to greet him, which lifted his mood as he was so very glad to hear once again that he still had his job, even though Joe already told him so.

Then the thing with the criminal happened who nearly hurt a cop in a moment of inattention, so Barry quickly took his leave afterwards, faulting still feeling not all that well for his sudden departure.

Which led him to where he is now…

Barry sighs softly and looks down at himself in his skintight suit, feeling uneasy even though he hasn't yet left the room. He grabs the dark jacket Harrison got for him and unzips it as he replays how the other man moved so quickly that even _he_ wasn't able to follow him with his eyes.

Could he really have similar abilities now?

Being this absurdly fast?

Harrison demonstrated to him Barry's new capabilities just this morning, making Barry's tray more or less disappear after he finished his breakfast before replacing it with a cup of coffee. The memory still makes him smile because he is pretty sure that his friend was actually showing off a bit by doing that, which is just funny, considering how serious Harrison usually is.

Barry closes his jacket and, with a somewhat heavy heart, pushes that thought away before leaving the safety of the trailer.

"Finally." Lisa, who has been learning next to the door against the side of the trailer all this time, immediately walks over to him and gives him a quick once over. There is an amused glint in her eyes when she meets his stare again and smirks. "You look _snazzy_."

He gives her a half-hearted glare and crosses his arms in front of his chest before he notices that Harrison is also walking over to him again. His cheeks immediately grow warm and he can't help but start fidgeting nervously. He really hopes he doesn't look as ridiculous as he feels.

He starts to regret having called Lisa to tag along.

"You're ready to go?" Harrison asks. Barry nods with his heart suddenly beating up in his throat. What if he couldn't repeat what he did before? What if he wasn't able to run this fast again? He has noticed that Harrison seems pleased by the notion that he could have similar powers as him, which is both understandable and sad, because Barry knows how lonely one can feel by being different, but he really doesn't want to disappoint him or the others.

"Y-yes," he agrees, swallowing nervously before turning to the long strip of even road once used by test pilots from Ferris Air.

No… he really _isn't_.

Cisco and Caitlin start explaining to him how they are going to measure his speed, what to keep in mind, and such, but he hardly listens. A tight heavy knot has formed at the bottom of his stomach, and he feels slightly sick as he gets to the starting line for the test.

He never liked running, he hated gym class in school, and as he gets in this all too familiar starting position, his mind is flooded by painful and unwanted memories before he is able to push them away and focus back on the road in front of him.

Harrison crouches down next to him, then, causing him to freeze before he shoots him a surprised and questioning look.

"I'll be there the second you need me," the other man tells him and there is a certainty to how he says it that takes the edge off of Barry's worry. "Just concentrate on running, Barry."

"Okay," he agrees and watches as Harrison gets up again and steps away from him.

Then it is time to run. Cisco gives him the signal, and, after just a second of hesitation, Barry pushes himself forward.

It is as if someone has flipped a switch in him the moment he moves. Suddenly, an indescribable energy is flowing through every fiber of his being.

The feeling is exhilarating, and so he only half-listens to what Caitlin and Cisco tell him via the headpiece he is wearing. For the first time in he doesn't know how long he feels completely free, like nothing is holding him back or keeping him down, and the world around him suddenly doesn't seem so threatening anymore-

The picture of a woman smiling at him crosses his mind, her eyes soft, warm, and loving.

Barry blinks and nearly stumbles but is able to regain his footing just as that thought is replaced by a memory of being pressed down, by a man above him who is hurting him – _had_ hurt him for months back then – and how Barry thought that he would certainly die.

However, another man—this one in yellow—suddenly appeared that night before disappearing just as quickly, leaving Barry's tormentor choking on his own blood—

"-op! Barry, you're going to crash-" Caitlin's voice is in his ears, and he can hear Lisa swear behind her in the background just as he notices the fast approaching water cannisters in front of him.

He tries to stop but knows that it's too late given the speed he is going at. So, he squeezes his eyes shut and tries to prepare himself for impact.

This is going to hurt—

But then someone is grabbing, and he can feel himself moving just as fast but this time not of his own volition. He's brought to an abrupt stop that leaves his stomach feel slightly queasy and his mind hazy and confused.

What…?

Barry blinks and realizes that he is standing next to the trailer again. He also notices that Harrison still has his arm around his back which certainly explains what just happened.

Before he can even utter a word, two arms are flung around him as Lisa pulls him into a bear-hug.

"You idiot! Why the hell do you have to always pull back into your own damn head at the worst possible moment?!" she asks him angrily but doesn't let go of him. "You could have been crushed like a shitty fly on a windshield with how ridiculously fast were going!" Then she pulls back and her eyes are wide with wonder and disbelief. "That shitty rodent has nothing on you, Bear."

Barry can't help but snort which causes Lisa to grin broadly before she cracks up too before pulling him into another hug.

"It's so your fault if I get grey hair before my 28th birthday, you little shit." She mutters against his shoulder before sighing in relief.

"That was crazy!" Cisco exclaims from his spot at the table, his squishy still in hand and his eyes glued to the screen in front of him. "You went nearly 300mph!" He turns to him then and grins. "You and Dr. Wells really seem to be meant for each other because _you_, my friend, are another speedster!"

Barry flushes and ducks his head. His heart is still hammering against his chest, and he doesn't feel particularly steady on his own legs, but he can't help but feel pleased by Cisco's words.

"Just because he can run fast doesn't mean he can't have other powers as well," Lisa interjects as she pulls back and turns to the young scientist. "I'm pretty sure Barry will turn out way more badass than your doctor ever could."

"L-Lisa," he complains unhappily and shoots Harrison a glance, who thankfully only seems amused by the blond woman's words.

"Well, we don't know all about Dr. Wells' powers either," Cisco protests half-heartedly, and Barry notices that his friend cheeks are slightly flushed and he seems to have trouble meeting Lisa's eyes… … Wait a minute. When did _that_ become thing?! Had Lisa actually been serious last night?

Barry's surprise over this unexpected realization regarding the actuality of Cisco's crush is cut short when Caitlin suddenly appears in front of him and demands to take some blood samples.

"And we have to measure your blood pressure," she goes on as she urges Barry over to take a seat at the table. A slight frown appears on her face after she has studied him for a moment. "You look pale again, Barry. Are you experiencing any dizziness? Fatigue?"

"A b-bit," he agrees and notices just then that he really doesn't feel so good anymore.

"You probably need to eat something to make up for the calories you've just burned off," Caitlin informs him, which prompts Cisco to cut in and inform him that, if he is anything like Dr. Wells, he would have to eat around 850 tacos to keep his energy levels up. At his slightly horrified expression, the other man quickly adds that it isn't as bad as it sounds.

"We've been working on this problem," Cisco explains as he gets up and walks over to his backpack. Barry watches him grab something from it before he makes his way back over to him, holding what looks like two rather huge energy bars in his hands. The younger man gives him a big smile and presents the snacks to him. "These two babies will have you covered. Each of them has around thirty thousand calories, which means that you will have to eat around six after you've done a jog using your _super speed_."

"What?" Barry can't help but feel slightly horrified by what he has just learned. That means he will always have to eat around one hundred eighty thousand calories after using this _powers_?! What the hell!? How is he supposed to _not_ starve like this!?

"Don't worry, man," Cisco assures him, putting the two bars down next to him on the table. "Dr. Wells faces the same problem, and he is doing just fine as you can see thanks to me and my brilliant version of _Scooby Snacks_."

"We are not going to call them that," Harrison interject with a frown. "We've already talked about that, Mr. Ramon."

"Sure, of course not, I know that, Dr. Wells," Cisco agrees with his employee a bit too quickly and Barry gets the odd feeling that this is not the last he is gong to heard of it.

"They are giant." Lisa, who has come up to where he is currently sitting and is having his blood pressure measured, grabs one of the bars and weighs it in her hand before she opens it and takes a sniff. The face she pulls doesn't exactly make Barry want to take a bite of it, and the pitying look she gives him then doesn't help either.

"D-don't be a brat," he huffs and turns to Harrison with a slightly concerned frown. "Are they good?"

It isn't reassuring that the other man seems to need to think about how to answer this question. "They're edible," he finally concedes, but quickly adds when he notices Barry's slightly alarmed expression: "Cisco is still working on them, and, contrary to how they tasted at first, they really are alright by now."

"Hey," Cisco complains and sniffs. "It's hard to come up with something tasty when you aren't able to taste it yourself, okay?"

"I'm aware of that, Cisco," Harrison agrees. "And I'm not complaining. You really made my life much easier with these energy bars."

"Not to mention that you'll likely be hungry enough more often than not that you won't really pay much attention to the taste of them, anyway," Caitlin adds as she finishes measuring his blood pressure and gets up to grab a syringe and vials for collecting blood samples.

That doesn't sound like fun. Barry has been hungry many times in his life and it is nothing he really wants to re-live on a daily basis because he can't get enough food in himself. He glances down at the bar next to him, trying to think of how many burgers he would have to eat to get to an equivalent amount of calories and to what amount of money that would add up to.

"Don't look so glum, Bar." Lisa pokes his shoulder and smirks when he looks up. "This just means that you can eat anything you want without having to worry about getting fat."

"Ins-stead I can w-worry about g-getting broke," he points out which causes Lisa to roll her eyes and call him a pessimist.

"You won't get broken nor starve." Barry looks back to Harrison who meets his gaze with a serious expression. "We'll make sure of that."

"Seeing that all of this is your fault in the first place, you better." Lisa shoots the doctor a dark look, and Barry nearly groans because his friend seems physically unable to let go of this.

"I'm just saying." She points out when she notices his glare, crossing her arms, the energy bar still in one hand. "And don't get all mopey again, even if your _Prince Charming_ should decide to kick you out, you know that we won't let you starve, dumbass."

"Oh my god, Lisa, please stop," he nearly whines, unable to look over at Harrison now, which causes his friend to snicker before she ruffles his hairs again like he's a little boy. "You're such a cutie when you get all embarrassed, you know that, Bear?"

"You w-want me to die of m-mortification, don't you?" He groans this time for real.

"Of course not," Lisa chides, tugging at his hair lightly before she lets go again. "And you're stuck with me, no matter what."

"Great…" He grumbles but smiles when she swats his shoulder in protest.

"I need you to hold still for a bit now," Caitlin interrupts his next words and nods to the syringe in her hand.

Barry complies while Lisa turns her attention to Cisco and starts to bug him with possible ideas regarding the taste of the energy bars. He doesn't miss how the young scientist gets all flustered the moment Lisa steps closer, or how she clearly picks up on it and enjoys this reaction.

Afterwards, when Caitlin gives him the okay to get up and eat, he joins Harrison, who is still standing a bit aside from the rest.

The energy bar turns out to taste alright in Barry's opinion, a bit bland but not nasty like he feared something with tons of calories packed into it would.

"You've enjoyed your first run?" Harrison asks curiously.

"Yes, it w-was brilliant," he agrees and can actually still feel a pleasant tingle on his skin when he thinks back to the electrifying rush that went through him for about 20 seconds before he nearly ended up breaking probably the majority of his bones. "Th-thank you, by the way." He gives Harrison a somewhat embarrassed smile. "F-for not l-letting me get c-crushed, I mean."

"Of course." Harrison gives him a bemused smile before the expression in his eyes turns more serious and slightly concerned. He considers Barry for a second before he goes on. "Something seemed to bother you toward the end of the test."

It isn't a question but Barry still gets what the other man means, which causes a slight unease to settle over him as he isn't sure what to say or how to explain.

He doesn't even really know what to think of this odd flashback as it caused a uncomfortable memory to briefly resurface, one which he would've rather have kept locked away somewhere forgotten.

"N-no," he finally answers, turning his eyes towards the wide training area. He can feel Harrison's gaze on himself as he does and fights the urge to cross his arms again. "J-just… it w-was n-nothing."

A brief silence follows, and he knows how lame and unbelievable this has sound, but he has had two very long days so far, and while he told Harrison about the child abuse he lived through when he was younger, he never really did so in actual detail. This memory… it touched upon something that would be hard to explain without sharing more information than he is really comfortable to giving away just yet.

Barry looks back to Harrison when he notices him stepping closer.

"You can talk to me if you have something on your mind that is troubling you," the other man tells him and there is concern visible in how he is watching him now. "I don't want to push you to do so, though, and I respect it if you prefer to deal with this on your own, but just keep in mind that I'm there if you need someone to listen."

This isn't the first time Harrison has offered to listen to him, and, like the couple of times before, Barry feels a comfortable warmth spread through him at the notion that his friend really would want to do so in case he decides to share something more about his past.

"Thank you," he says quietly, giving Harrison a small but grateful smile. "R-really, this m-means a lot to me."

The other man nods, and Barry can't help but notice the way he is currently being studied, like Harrison is really and truly fond of him. Like Barry is actually someone special. It is comforting and nice, but it also causes a familiar heat to return full force to his cheeks.

"Hey, love birdies!" Lisa's voice cuts through the pleasant moment like a hot knife through butter, and Barry shoots her a glare that should have caused her to go up in flames, which she skillfully ignores. "It's getting cold. You two think we can postpone any further testing till tomorrow? Cisco also just offered to buy me pizza when we're back at S.T.A.R. labs, so can we drive back?"

"I did no such thing!" Cisco protests but falls quiet when Lisa puts an arm around him and gives him a sugar sweet smile that probably causes all of the young scientist's blood to shoot to his face judging by how crimson he turns. "Don't be like that, Cisco, I would share with you, of course." She angles her head then a bit and shoots him a rather sultry look through her eyelashes. "And I would be so very grateful to you."

"Lisa." Barry groans before walking over to his friend to pull her away from Cisco, who seems about ready to die of a stroke. "D-don't be a brat."

"Stop imitating Lenny." She rolls her eyes and smirks. "You really _suck_ at it."

"I'm not, I'm j-just pointing out th-the obvious," he replies, dodging when she is tries to swat him over the head for it. He notices the slightly taken aback expression on her face, and it takes him a

moment to realize that it is likely because he has unconsciously used his powers. Before he can even decide how to feel about that, he notices how Lisa gets that sort of slightly manic glint in her eyes that usually never means anything good.

"Oh, we're going to have so much fun with this," she tells him. Barry can't help but frown uneasily because he is pretty sure Lisa's interpretation of fun is not going to fit his own in this case.

"No, w-we are certainly n-not," he argues and can't help but remember that one time when they were both still teenagers and she made him go along pranking her brother, shaving his head while he was asleep after a night out in the _Saloon_. He avoided Len for nearly three months after that, terrified of his revenge because back then he still was mostly afraid of him.

"We certainly are," she disagrees with a smirk, but doesn't elaborate on any possible ideas for future hijinks and instead nods towards the trailer. "Go change so that we can leave, I'm hungry."

Barry frowns and looks over to Caitlin and Cisco, the latter of which still looks a bit like a pale tomato, wanting to make sure that they aren't planning on any more experiments right now as he did just a very short run out here.

"Sure," Caitlin agrees. "You can change, I need to run some more tests before you go for another round, and I need some of the equipment in the lab for that."

That's a bit of a relief, considering how much he is looking forward to finally getting out of the suit, and he is just about to hurry over to the trailer when Harrison steps in front him. He gives his friend a curious look and aches an eyebrow, wondering whether he still wants to do some tests out here. This doesn't turn out to be the case, though.

"You've done really well, Barry," Harrison says, taking a loose hold of his hand. There is small but visibly pleased smile on his lips as he watches him now.

Barry feels himself flush in response, oddly touched by the unexpected praise.

"Th-thanks," he murmurs, ducking his head before he shoots the other man a shy look from under his eyelashes. Harrison's eyes seem to darken for a second, and Barry feels like his heart just jumped up into his throat when he realizes that the emotion he recognizes in them is _hunger_.

It catches him utterly off-guard, and he pulls his hand away before he can think.

Harrison looks about as surprised by his reaction as he himself is before the man's expression is replaced by worry. The other man is just about to say something when they are once again interrupted. … of course.

"Move it, Barry." Lisa meets his glare with a clearly amused look and aches an eyebrow as if not getting why he would be suddenly upset. She seems to have missed the brief interaction between him and Harrison, and he is quite thankful for it because he knows that, despite her best intentions, she would have made the uncomfortable situation between only much worse. "We wanna order pizza, or have you forgotten already?"

"N-no." He shakes his head, and before either of them can say anything else, he hurries back over to the trailer. His face feels hot as he enters it and there is the unmistakable sensation of relief flooding his body the moment he closes and locks the door.

Barry stand in front of it for a couple of seconds before he lets his forehead drop against the cool surface, groaning quietly.

_Great_.

He really could have handled that better…

Slowly, he makes his way over to where he left his clothes folded, trying not to think about what an ass he just made out of himself.

He doesn't feel really hungry anymore.


	23. Late Night Snack

Barry doesn't look exactly peaceful as he sleeps.

He never has, really.

Eobard finds it somewhat ironic that the younger man seemed the most at ease to the world around him during his time spent as a coma patient.

It bothers him.

It shouldn't. He knew what to expect from the beginning, but it still does.

Barry had been severely abused for a large part of his childhood and time as a teenager. Eobard was well aware of that. He made sure of it, after all.

This doesn't change the fact that he still hates how badly it scarred him.

Or how it makes it impossible for Harrison to get close to him just yet.

At least in the way he desires.

Slowly, Eobard steps into the room and towards Barry, who is oblivious unaware of his late night visitor.

Tonight he isn't using his speed, mostly because he isn't sure how Barry and his newly established connection to the speed force would react to his own under these circumstances.

Eobard has always been able to feel the Flash, his existence more like an omnipresent touch lingering at the back of his mind whenever he connected to the speed force, and he has never been able to find out whether this was a one-way thing or whether his former nemesis was able to sense him as well.

It makes things certainly easier now that he doesn't have to hide his powers anymore, especially around Barry, but it would still be a bit awkward to explain what he is doing in the younger man's room watching him sleep should he accidently notice him. Getting Barry to stay at his home had been difficult, and Eobard certainly doesn't want him to reconsider his acceptance of that offer. Especially not by spooking him away.

Not if it means Barry would move back in with Leonard Snart and his annoyance of a sister.

It displeases him greatly how much of the young man's life those two have claimed for themselves as it is, he doesn't want either of them – especially Cold – to retake the position of Barry's main confidant again.

The Snarts have the advantage that they have been part of blonde's life much longer than Eobard has been so far. This doesn't change that Eobard is now a much better source of comfort and assurance than either of them ever could be thanks to his and Barry's shared connection to the speed force, though.

The notion is quite satisfying, and he is certain that this will be enough to make Barry his own in the end.

He just has to be patient.

No matter how bothersome this is.

Barry starts to stir, causing Eobard to freeze for a second.

A soft groan escapes the younger man before he frowns slightly in his sleep and starts to mumble something unintelligible.

He seems upset.

A nightmare, then.

Eobard briefly wonders what Barry could be haunted by right now. He has certainly enough to choose from when it comes to his personal sources of horror.

The thought doesn't sit well with him, and he mentally swats it away like a bothersome fly as he steps closer to the bed.

The newly established connection between Barry and the speed force allows him to feel how unsettled the younger man grows with each passing second, though just watching him is certainly enough to do so. Experiencing it is much more intimate, though, and Eobard can't help but feel pleased by the notion that he and Barry share such a deep bond now.

However, this giddiness only lasts for a couple of seconds, before the whisk of emotions he can feel start to become clearer and sharper. Then he really begins to recognize them for what they are…

Pain, fear, hopelessness, humiliation…

They have a sobering effect on him, uncomfortably so, and Eobard almost feels bad when he realizes that he has started to smile at the prospect of them growing closer.

He doesn't like the idea of Barry being in distress. He hasn't for a long time. Not in this timeline, anyway.

This Barry… he's special.

Perfect.

He is Eobard's, and Eobard will look after him like he always wanted to.

He will make up for the mistakes he made in the past and the horrors he made Barry go through.

Barry groans again and actually lifts his arms, as if in defense of an unseen attacker.

The gesture is quite unsettling, so Eobard decides to wake him before Barry has to experience any more of this.

It is a surprisingly easy thing to do—the touch alone is nearly enough, although Eobard is certain that he would have gotten himself a broken nose if he wasn't able to freely display his super speed right then due to how violently the boy reacts to him.

"N-no!" Barry shouts, the fear thick in his voice. Eobard knows better than to linger close or try to physically restrain the upset man from thrashing. He is awake now, anyway. It will only take him a couple of seconds to realize where he is and that he isn't in any danger. Thus, Eobard gets up again and takes a steps back, making sure to give Barry plenty of space.

"No…" The blonde repeats, softer this time, sounding more uncertain and confused than scared. Eobard watches Barry as he goes still for a moment, upper body twisted away from Eobard as he stares at the opposite wall, leaning heavily on his elbows.

Barry slowly, nearly reluctantly, turns his face to glance over his shoulder at Eobard. Even in the dim light of the dark guestroom Eobard can see him flush the moment he picks up on the actual situation.

He gives Barry a faint but hopefully comforting smile and steps a bit closer again, but stops as soon as he notices how the younger man seems to tense up even more in response.

"It was just a nightmare," he explains softly. "You're save here, Barry."

Barry frowns, looking close to denying anything about being afraid or having had a nightmare in the first place. Considering their current situation though, it would be pointless, and he seems to be aware of how silly that would make him look.

Instead of saying anything, Barry shuts his mouth again and pushes himself up into a sitting position. He tenses as he pulls his legs close and hugs them to his chest, probably an unconscious reaction, considering how he flushes a moment later when he seems to realize what he is doing.

Eobard watches him quietly, well aware that it would be better to wait and see what happens next instead of offering any words of comfort or advice just yet. Barry still looks like he hasn't fully regained his composure and it would not help to make him feel even less at ease.

Seeing him like this, his emotions so unguarded on his face, is oddly humbling. Knowing that he doesn't perceive Eobard as a threat, despite everything Barry experienced in his past, allays some of his fear about having the Snarts threaten his position as Barry's primary source of security and comfort.

The room is silent around them. Eobard listens as Barry's breathing pattern slowly becomes more natural as the young man is finally able to shake off the last echoes of his nightmare.

"D-did I w-wake you?" Barry glances briefly at him as he says this, looking quite embarrassed.

"No," Eobard replies. "I've still been up reading."

It's not exactly a lie. He _had_ been reading before coming here. It's all about technicalities.

"Y-you h-heard m-me?" Barry sounds upset and hugs his legs a bit tighter against his chest.

"Not from my room," he assures him. "I was just about to go downstairs to make myself a small late night snack."

Barry seems to pique up at that, and it is hard for Eobard not to smile in amusement about how predictable he is.

All speedsters need an extraordinary amount of energy in comparison to normal human beings in order to function. If they aren't yet familiar with the source of their powers and thus unaware that they can get this energy from the speed force itself, they are relying on ridiculous amounts of food to provide themselves with constant fuel.

Barry is still utterly ignorant when it comes to his powers. He's hardly had them for a week so far. Eobard knows that it is solely his task to act as Barry's mentor. At least as far as he can without making himself suspicious. However, the public has never had any problem believing he is a genius and he is certain that this time will be no exception. He does have a 'nine month' head start on figuring out how own powers as far as Barry knows.

"Would you like to join me?" Eobard watches how Barry seems to mull over the offer, a faint blush rising on his cheeks.

"I don't w-want to b-bother you," Barry tells him quietly, frowning down at the bed in front of him. He starts to nervously gnaw at his lower lip.

"You aren't." Eobard meets his eyes easily that show both doubt and hope, and he gives the young man an encouraging smile. "I actually would appreciate some company."

He isn't particularly hungry, but he isn't averse to the idea of getting a snack, especially if it means Barry would lose that slightly haunted expression.

"Okay," the young man agrees, somewhat hesitantly, as he uncurls his legs. "Someth-thing to eat wwould be n-nice."

"It would," Eobard agrees, amused.

They make their way down to the kitchen at a leisurely pace, like mortal men. Barry, despite being able to use his speed now, is still very reluctant to do so. He seems scared of it in a way that worries Eobard. Usually, in any other previous repetition of the initial first world, Barry took to his powers naturally, nearly gleefully so. It is different this time.

"You've anything particular on mind as a snack?" Eobard asks after they've entered the kitchen. "I could also order something."

Barry stops beside the kitchen island, still looking a bit tense, and awkwardly shifts his weight from one foot to the other as he considers the offer. He then crosses arms in front of his chest, almost defensively. Eobard doubts that the younger man is even aware of what he is doing, and the revelation tugs at something inside him which makes him want to step closer and offer some sort of comfort.

"M-maybe pizza?" the younger speedster asks hesitantly, shooting him an uncertain look, as if he was worried about being a bother.

"That sounds good," he agrees easily. "I know a place that still delivers at this time and is quite good."

Barry relaxes a bit and offers him a small but grateful smile.

They settle on two XXL tropical Hawaiian pizzas, one XXL New York deli pizza, one baked lasagna, and two cheese cakes before Eobard does the order. It should be enough to quench the younger speedster's appetite and hopefully help him catch some more rest tonight before he has to leave for work in the morning.

While Eobard is on the phone, Barry takes a seat on the island, nursing a glass of water he got for himself, looking a little more at ease.

"The food should arrive in thirty-five minutes," Harrison informs him after ending the call before making his way over to the island to take the seat opposite Barry.

"G-great," Barry offers but sounds mostly tired. There are dark circles under his eyes, making it obvious again that he has had quite some trouble finding rest the past few days. Eobard knows that this isn't an uncommon thing for him as the younger man tends to have troubles sleeping more often than not, and with everything that has happened to him over the last couple of weeks, it's really no surprise that this would only cause his sleeping issues worsen.

It probably doesn't help that he still feels extremely guilty over what happened with Mardon a bit over a week ago, and his reluctance to put on the costume and go out to face the Weather Wizard, which then resulted in the death of Joe West should Eobard not have taken care of the super powered criminal in his stead.

This also still gives Eobard a headache. He hadn't expected Barry to _not_ go out there and fight. It seemed so unlike him. While it didn't exactly worry Eobard, knowing that he changed the timeline enough by now that he should have considered the possibility of something like this happening, it still was something he entirely understood.

"I…" Barry's voice sounds thin as he breaks the heavy silence that has settled between them. He coughs lightly before going on. "I-I… I d-dreamed of one of m-my earliest f-foster b-brothers."

Eobard feels a bit taken aback for a second. He didn't expect Barry to share the content of his dreams with him just yet. At the same time, it also fill him with an inappropriate sense of glee, considering how long he was waited for this moment to happen.

"H-he w-was…" Barry looks distressed for a moment briefly before he takes a slow calming breath. "He w-was m-much o-older th-than m-me. T-ten y-years. I w-was s-six a-at th-that time… h-he… hhurt m-me…" He stops here, frowning down at the glass in his hands as he swallows.

Eobard doesn't miss the tight grip he has on the thin glass and worries for a moment that Barry might break it and hurt himself. Ultimately, he doesn't say anything about it. Right now, he knows he shouldn't do anything else but listen.

Barry licks his lips and shares with him a look of uncertainty, his skin nearly sickly pale, but his cheeks still flushed in what has to be embarrassment.

"He l-liked t-to... h-his f-family, m-my f-f-foster f-family, th-they h-had a b-big g-garden and h-his pparents d-didn't p-pay m-much at-tention t-to e-either o-of us… th-they… they d-didn't l-like m-me… or him… h-he g-got a c-couple of f-friends wh-who w-were over all th-the t-time…" Barry breaks off and bites his lower lip hard enough that Eobard nearly expects him to draw blood.

"Th-they… one d-day th-they g-got b-bored a-and… th-there w-was a w-wooden b-box in th-the b-bbasem-ment th-they… the b-box, I d-don't r-remember wh-what it w-was f-for, b-but it w-was smsmall, e-even f-for m-me… I c-couldn't m-move… I w-was c-curled up a-and… th-they… i-it w-w-was d-dark a-and… th-they b-buried m-me… I-I…" He stops again and squeezes his eyes shut, grimacing like the memory is causing him actual pain. "It w-was d-dark a-and… I c-couldn't m-move a-and… aand I w-was s-scared… I-I s-screamed f-for h-help b-but… n-nobody h-heard m-me a-and… I… th-there w-was a th-thunder s-storm, i-it w-was s-so l-loud… r-really loud, and I w-was b-buried in th-the bbox a-and c-could f-feel it… it w-was s-so l-loud… I could f-feel it in m-my b-bones and… I w-was s-so s-scared… I th-thought I w-was g-going t-to d-die…"

Barry grits his teeth and rubs his eyes angrily as he tries to calm himself again.

Eobard watches him silently, surprised by what he has just learned and angered by the fact that he hadn't known about this. He's pretty sure that he knows what family Barry is talking about as the young man only had one foster family before his seventh birthday. Eobard picked them because they were abusive and neglectful individuals. He also knew the son was violent and had a malicious streak. He watched them break Barry in many ways, not with sexual abuse just then, but it was still hell for the little kid who was still missing his home. A home he could hardly remember anymore.

Unfortunately, due to his work as Dr. Harrison Wells, he had other things to look after at the same time, and it seems that during one of his lapses in watching over the young Barry Allen, the nasty older foster brother decided to have some fun with him.

Eobard wonders how long the little shit had kept Barry buried in a tiny box in utter darkness. It could not have been longer than three days, he never let more time pass between his check-ups on Barry than that, and considering that he probably would have suffocated if he had been kept down there for more than an hour or so, it could not have been that long. Whatever the actual period of time, it was obviously enough to traumatize him, and suddenly his fear of thunderstorms makes a lot more sense.

"I… I w-wanted t-to h-help," Barry goes on after a long tensed moment of silence. "I w-wanted to sstop M-Mardon, b-but… I… h-he…"

And now Eobard understands.

"He uses the weather as his weapon," he points out quietly. "Thunder and lightning."

Barry sniffles quietly and nods, unable to meet his eyes. He's hugging himself again and looks utterly miserable. "I w-was s-scared."

"Which is understandable," Eobard assures him soothingly. "Even if you hadn't had such a horrible experience as a little child, it would be." He wants to get up and walk over to the young man, offer comfort in a more physical way than mere words, but he knows that that would only frighten him more considering how visibly upset he is already. "Mardon's dangerous and you've just woken up from a nine month coma. Nobody holds it against you that you don't feel up to fight people with ridiculous powers like controlling the weather."

"Joe nearly d-died," Barry reminds him, looking so damn guilt ridden that Eobard nearly tells him to stop it. "B-because I'm a c-coward…" He sniffles again lowers his head. "C-Cisco w-was w-wrong, I'm n-nothing l-like a h-hero…" He glances briefly at him, looking utterly miserable. "I'm n-not like y-you, Har-rison, I'm w-weak a-and… d-damaged…"

It is infuriating to hear Barry talk about himself like that, and Eobard nearly hisses at him to shut up. Barry Allen is the Flash, one of the most powerful beings to ever walk the earth, with powers that expand well beyond his inhuman speed. It's one of the reasons Harrison picked him as his partner. He knew the moment he first found out about the scarlet speedster that the young man was supposed to be his.

Hearing Barry talk about himself like this is… upsetting.

However, his anger is quickly squashed again. Eobard actually feels a bit guilty about having nearly snapped at the younger man for displaying one of the scars he has to carry around due to him. It seems that Barry isn't the only one who would benefit from some rest.

"Someone who lived through an experience like this and still came out as a decent and upright person who cares about others is not what I would define as _weak_." Eobard meets Barry's surprised eyes firmly. "You had an awful childhood, and you obviously were hurt in more ways than anybody, let alone a child, should have to experience. You still decided to live on and make something out of yourself, and prove that anybody who would think that this could result in damaging a person beyond repair, yourself included, was wrong."

Barry blinks rapidly, trying to hold the tears back, but unable to stop them from falling then. He sniffles again and brushes them away, averting his gaze back to the surface of the table.

"You're not weak, and you're not broken. You're hurt, but this doesn't belittle what a magnificent and intelligent man you've become." Eobard means it, all of it, and while he knows of Barry's lacking self-worth, it still doesn't sit well with him to experience it firsthand again. He gets up, causing the younger speedster to freeze and shoot him a concerned, wary look.

He moves around the kitchen island slowly, trying to appear as little as possible like a threat to the still clearly upset man, who keeps watching him with a scared expression as he stops beside to him but doesn't flee. Not that Barry would be able to outrun him anyway just yet…

"You're hurt," he repeats quietly as he meets the younger man's eyes. He's reminded once again suddenly how beautiful Barry looks, how close to breaking apart.

Harrison keeps moving slowly as he reaches for him, cups his neck and urges Barry very lightly to tilt his head a bit back. "But you're not weak. You're one of the strongest people I've ever met. Strong and kind…and beautiful."

Something flashes across Barry's eyes, a mixture of surprise and _desire_. Eobard has to fight down the urge to smile, instead leaning down closer to him…

Their lips meet this time without interruption. Harrison nearly groans in relief and excitement, because he has waited so long for this. It's incredibly difficult not just giving into his desire right then and there, to pull Barry closer and deepen the kiss before pushing him to the ground and taking him. To _finally_ have him in all the ways he dreamed of—

Barry makes a small sound, not one of distress, but rather one of surprise, as though he truly enjoys the feeling of Harrison's lips on his own.

It causes a pleasing warmth to coil in Eobard's guts, and so he takes a small step as he sucks Barry's lower lip between his own, which earns him a soft whimper. It is a delicious little noise, and he wants to hear it again so badly.

This isn't the first time Eobard's experienced their '_first'_ kiss under similar circumstances though, and he knows how easily Barry's enjoyment can turn to terror. Thus, he forces himself to pull back after half a minute or so and gives the neck he is still cupping a slight squeeze, meeting the other man's eyes with a soft smile.

Barry's cheeks are flushed, and he looks utterly dazzled. It causes Eobard to smile fondly because this marvelous being will be his—_is_ his now already.

"You're a wonderful young man, whom I've had the great fortune of meeting," he says quietly, slowly drawing small soothing circles with his thumb behind Barry's left ear. "You're not made by your past, Barry, but by your actions."

The flush intensifies, and Barry averts his eyes for a second before gazing up at him again, looking shy and relieved and grateful.

Eobard thinks that the feeling that swells up in his chest, the warmth that settles over him, must be _love_.

It is reassuring and calming thought, while at the same time he feels a bit smug because Leonard Snart has never had this, and never _will _have this. This is his, this intimacy between them, and it's something Snart will never be able to lay is damn fingers on.

It catches Eobard off-guard when he realizes how bluntly he displays his jealousy towards the other man, even if it is just in his own mind. He is very self-observant, and while he tried to ignore it in the past, he knows that he feels threatened by Snart. He usually tries to not acknowledge it.

However, there have been past timelines where Captain Cold and the Flash…

Eobard pushes that thought away, annoyed at himself for thinking about this now of all time.

Instead, he forces himself to focus on Barry again, who is still watching him with such unguarded and open eyes. Barry trusts him.

"Thank you," Barry finally says quietly, taking a loose hold of Eobard's wrist as he closes his eyes with a soft sigh.

_You're magnificent, and you're powerful. You're everything I've ever wanted_, Eobard thinks.

_You're __**mine**_.

They stand like this for a long time, close and quiet, and the tension slowly seeps away from around them. It is replaced by a much more comfortable feeling, something warm and soothing.

The pizza delivery guy finally arrives a minute later though, and Eobard has to answer the door. Barry seems to let go of him only reluctantly.

When Eobard returns to the kitchen with their order, Barry is only just putting out two plates on the kitchen island. It is a nice sight. Something mundane and normal, sure, but still nice.

The food turns out to be quite to their liking, and while he is still not really that hungry, he enjoys watching Barry eat the first Hawaiian pizza with gusto while he himself nibbles away on a slice of his own.

"You're enjoying the food?" he asks, watching with some amusement as the younger man looks slightly guilty, as if he think he's taken way more than is appropriate. Barry is still getting used to having to eat this much to keep himself going though, and worries about how much he is costing him.

"Yes," the younger speedster agrees, eyeing the box with the New York deli pizza with visible hunger. Somehow though, he is able to refrain from immediately reaching for it.

"You don't need to hesitate," Harrison replies. "Just take it. I've ordered the food to be eaten, after all."

"You ordered the deli pizza," Barry points out, but shoots the cardboard box another hopeful glance.

Eobard snorts, pushing the box over to him. "Just take it. I can get another one if I want."

"You're n-not really hungry, are you?" Barry is watching him with a slight frown as he accepts the pizza, clearly aware that Harrison hasn't even eaten half of his own plate by now. "Not anymore," he replies easily. "I wanted a snack, and I got one."

"You don't have to stay d-down here w-with me. I don't w-want to keep you up."

"You aren't."

They study each other for a long moment, and Eobard knows that Barry is trying to gauge whether he is saying the truth or not. The blonde looks calmer again, more collected, which is good. Seeing him so upset and tense before had been uncomfortable to watch for the most part.

"Thank you." Barry ducks his head slightly. Eobard watches his cheeks flush once more. It is slightly amusing how much the younger man is prone to blush, especially around him.

He allows himself to reach over and cover Barry's hand, the one that is still resting on the pizza box, with his own. Their eyes meet, and Eobard smiles warmly. "You're welcome." ***

Barry feels oddly on edge.

It isn't his nerves.

Well…not all _that_ much, at least.

It's the sensation of having too much energy. He feels the ever present urge to move, and he can't remember when keeping still has ever be this difficult for him, even as a child.

He frowns down at the shoe prints on the ground in front of him, trying them to make sense of them by sheer force of will.

Of course, it doesn't work, and the shoe prints stay the same. Six pairs, all identical but all seemingly belonging to somebody else…

How odd.

"You've something for me, Barry?" Barry shoots a glance over his shoulder and meets Joe's eyes. A familiar guilt settles over his shoulders as usual when he is around the detective these days, but he tries to ignore it.

It and the ugly scar on the right side of the other man's face that runs from his temple down to the middle of his cheek where a piece of broken wood had hit him during Mardon's rampage…

"Barry?" Joe sounds concerned, and Barry realizes that he has vanished inside his own head again.

Stupid…

"W-well," he starts and turns back to the mysterious footprints. "Kind of."

"Kind of?" Joe arches an eyebrow.

"There are shoe p-prints th-that belong to s-six p-pair of shoes." Barry nods to the ground in front of him as he points them out. "And th-they seem to be c-completely-"

"Allen," Captain Singh interrupts him as he joins them, stopping next to Joe, an impatient and slightly annoyed expression on his face. "What do you have?"

"Sh-shoe p-prints," he stammers without thinking and feels how his cheeks heat up in embarrassment. The captain seems to fight the urge to roll his eyes while Joe is unable to hide a slightly exasperated but fond expression.

"Shoe prints?" Singh asks with a frown. "From the murderer?"

Barry swallows and coughs lightly, before he nods somewhat hesitantly. "Th-the m-murderer and his ac-complices."

"Accomplices?" Singh seems to find this piece of information hard to believe for some reason as he shares a look with Joe. Barry is almost certain he is missing something here.

"Y-yeah…" he tries to make it sound like he is certain about it, but it still comes out more like a question.

"The security cam shows only one man that entered the shop before the murder occurred," Joe explains, once again eyeing him with concern.

"Th-there are m-more sh-shoe p-prints, though," Barry insists and tries to ignore how stupid he sounds now that his stammer is acting up again. He's been feeling off all day, and having the captain loom over him and look at him like he can't remember why he hired him in the first place is not helping.

"If that's really the case, it means more work for you," Singh points out rather tersely. Barry is pretty sure the only reason why the captain isn't chewing him out for his probably rather unlikely sounding claim, considering the security cam footage, is because he takes pity on him. This doesn't do anything to make Barry feel any less like an idiot though.

The captain's mobile phone rings just then, and Barry turns his attention back to the shoe prints in front of him, frowning as he tries to ignore Joe's intense gaze on the back of his neck.

"I've to go back to the precinct," Singh tells Joe after ending the call, looking grim and annoyed all over again. He leaves without another word to Barry.

They both watch the captain walk off. Barry tries not to feel like he has just embarrassed both himself and Joe.

"You think there are more than one?" the detective asks, crouching down beside him as he glances over the ground in front of them with a thoughtful expression. After a brief moment he nods and shoots him a look of consideration. "This is an unusual number of foot prints for one guy trying to get quickly in and out."

"Yeah," Barry agrees quietly, feeling somewhat grateful to Joe for not dismissing his observation like the captain had. "I th-think there were s-six of them."

"You can see that from the prints on the ground alone?" Joe asks, but doesn't sound like he is outright doubting him.

He shrugs. He isn't sure how to reply. He has always had a quirk for his job, he isn't sure why or how.

"I'm p-probably w-wrong, anyway." Barry gets up. "I p-probably just made an idiot out of mys-self."

The notion is daunting, especially because he still got his job back despite being absent for nearly a whole year.

"You seemed to think that you were on to something before," Joe remarks after he has straightened up as well. "You should stick to that hunch. You usually have a nose for these kind of things, and the captain knows that as well."

Barry nods even though he doubts the validity of that statement.

With a soft huff, he reaches up and rubs his eyes. He still feels odd, like his skin is too small for him, like he should move.

… like he should run.

He frowns and pushes that notion away. He has other things to concentrate on, like solving a

homicide.

"Barry," Joe starts, and Barry turns his attention back to him. The other man doesn't immediately continue. Instead, he considers him for a moment. "You know that you can talk to me, right? I mean, I'm just Iris' dad, but we've known each other long enough that I consider you a very good friend of mine."

Barry can't help but smile. Hearing this is unexpected but nice, and it definitely lifts his mood. He nods. "Of c-course, Joe. I know."

Over the years since he met Iris, he has grown close to both her and her father, and by now he considers Joe nearly something of an uncle, someone who is there if he needs help, and who welcomes him into his house like he is an actual part of the family.

"I'm sorry if I w-worry you." He really means it. Joe is a good friend who cares about him, and it isn't surprising that he has picked up on the fact that something weird is going on. The man is one of the CCPD's best detectives after all. The problem is only that Joe doesn't know about his powers… yet.

Harrison told him to be careful about sharing this secret, and he understands that. Should the wrong people find out about his strange powers, it would most likely lead to him ending up as a guinea pig.

The notion of that alone scares him.

But Joe… he and Iris should know.

"There is nothing for you to be sorry about," Joe tells him earnestly. "I know that you've a lot to deal with after the last nine months, and I understand that it is difficult. I just want you to know that Iris and I are here for you if you need anything, whether it be someone to listen or help in any other way."

"I do. Thank you, Joe." Barry sometimes wonders whether this is what it would be like to have a father. He never really had one, but he likes to think that this comes close to it.

"Good." Joe nods. "And don't forget about dinner tomorrow." He makes a slight face even though he tries to hide it. "Iris wants me to remember you that it is _fine_ to bring Wells along."

Barry nearly snorts, more amused than annoyed by Joe's ongoing and odd mistrust of Harrison.

"You s-sure you don't w-want to skip tom-morrow?" he asks, grinning. "You w-wouldn't only have tto deal w-with Ed-die b-but with Harrison as w-well."

"Don't remind me." Joe huffs. "The both of you will be responsible for me going grey before I'm fifty."

"I don't get wh-why you d-don't like, Eddie. He's a r-really nice guy." Barry remarks as he crouches down again and starts to go over the foot prints once again.

"He's a cop." Joe makes it sound like it's a horrible concept, even though it is his own chosen profession. Barry shoots him an amused look.

"So are you," he points out.

"This is exactly the reason I didn't want Iris to join the force."

"So she w-wouldn't date?"

Joe shoots him a glare. Barry lifts a hand in an appeasing manner, knowing full well what the other man is going on about.

"She's just setting herself up to get hurt," Joe remarks darkly.

"Or she's f-finding someone who m-makes her happy," he adds as he starts to take some more pictures. "Sh-she's c-clever. She knows wh-what she's doing, Joe."

"She's a kid."

Barry snorts and shoots the other man an amused look. "She's t-twenty f-five."

"Age doesn't change a damn about her being my baby girl," Joe argues. Barry thinks that they've just reached the root of the problem but stays quiet about. He certainly isn't going to start an argument with him by accident. Joe is a really amazing guy, but he could be so damn childish if he felt wronged by someone.

Aside from that, he is also pretty certain that Eddie being a cop is only part of the problem. What is probably a much bigger thorn in Joe's side is that Eddie is now his new partner as well and after what happened to Fred…

"Tell Iris th-that I'll ext-tend the invitation to Harrison." Barry lowers the camera and turns his head to face Joe. "Th-though, he'll most l-likely pass. He's qu-quite busy right now."

Harrison and Cisco are working on the treadmill again, adjusting it to Harrison's continuingly increasing speed. Barry is pretty sure that his partner would agree and tag along to the dinner tomorrow, but he doesn't want to make the whole thing any worse for Joe than it has to be. Also, Harrison really doesn't deserve to be put through a meal like this.

"That's a real shame," Joe says, and Barry rolls his eyes before he turns back to his task at hand.

"He's going to s-stick around. One w-way or an-nother you'll have to l-learn to accept him."

"I've enough trouble to deal with now that Iris is dating my partner, Barr. You and Wells are far down on my list of things I've to face and come to term with right now."

Barry chuckles as he snaps another photo.

It's good to see how some things seem to stay just the same no matter how much everything else changes.


	24. Beers, Comfort, and Uneasy Truths

Barry pushes his way into Len's apartment the moment the other man opens the door.

"Hello…?" Len eyes him with a slight frown but doesn't stop him.

"F-family is t-too damn complicated." Barry huffs and let himself drop onto the couch. He rubs his face with a soft groan.

"I take it that it was a _nice_ dinner at the West's, then?" Len asks as he makes his way over to the kitchen and sounds way too amused for Barry's liking.

"L-let's say it like this, it c-couldn't have gone m-much worse if I had b-brought H-Harrison w-with me," he remarks morosely.

"Ouch." Len chuckles, and Barry listens to how he opens the fridge. "You want a beer to quell your sorrows?"

"Yeah." He sighs and lets his head drop back. "Iris is angry at me f-for not s-sticking up more for her and Eddie, and J-Joe is angry at m-me for not t-taking his side… how am _I_ always ending up as th-the bad guy?"

"You're too nice and let other people walk-"

"It w-was a _r-rhetorical_ qu-question, Len," Barry cuts his friend off and shoots him a glare as the other man makes his way back over to him with two bottles of beer.

"'S still true." Len hands him one bottle before he takes a seat next to him. "You want to make everybody happy and end up making nobody-"

"Len." He moans and punches the other man's upper arm lightly. "Don't."

"You're way too nice," Len repeats with a smirk as he opens his drink.

"Someone has to be around here," Barry grumbles and pushes his shoes off before he moves over so that he can pull his feet onto the cough and rest against his friend. "… and you're 'n jackass."

Len snorts and takes a pull of his beer before he asks. "So you came between the cop and his daughter?"

"More like being shoved b-between the fronts," he remarks a bit tersely and opens his own beer. "I'd be angry at Eddie as w-well if that guy hadn't l-looked so very uncomfortable towards the end. I th-think he would have preferred taking c-care of a hostage s-situation over this dinner."

Len chuckles. "Sounds like it was a complete success."

"In getting Iris and Joe all r-riled up ag-gain," Barry agrees and grunts. "Those two can be so rid-diculous at times."

"Which you knew already before accepting the invitation to the dinner."

"… you're supposed to be on _my_ side here."

"You've my deepest sympathy, then."

Barry grins and shakes his head. "You're still horrible at this."

"At what? Being honest?" Len replies drily.

"At feeling pity for me after the m-miser I j-just w-went through."

"You poor darling," Len mocks for which he gets a light jab with Barry's elbow to the side.

"B-be nice to me, or I'll t-tell Lisa," he mock-threatens.

"You really think you'll get any more sympathy from Lisa for accepting an invitation to a dinner you knew from the get go could only turn out like this?"

Barry frowns and meets Len's amused look with a half-hearted glare. He knows that his friend is right, after all.

With a soft huff, he lets his head fall back so that it is resting on Len's shoulder. "This just sucks."

"They'll calm down till Monday," Len points out.

"I hope so," he murmurs and closes his eyes for a moment. The fight between Iris and Joe has him pretty upset. He doesn't like it when people fight, especially ones he cares about, and especially when he feels like he should have done something to prevent it, but neither of them wanted to listen.

"Joe's s-still upset ab-bout Fred." Barry nips on his beer and studies the bottle.

"He'll get over it eventually," Len says, and while Barry isn't looking at him, he can feel his friend's gaze on him.

"Yeah… I know…"

Joe's tough, Barry is well aware of that. He also knows that this man can hold a grudge like hardly another person, and it worries him. What if he eventually finds out that it has been _him_ who is responsible that his partner was killed by Marco? Harrison told him that it would be better to keep it to himself that he has powers, at least for now, and Barry gets it, it's just…

He frowns and takes a pull of his beer, enjoying the bitter taste that reminds him of the man next to him, of Lisa, and comfort.

"You're doing it again." Len meets his confused expression with a slightly annoyed on.

"What?" Barry asks. "Wh-what am I doing again?"

"Guilt-tripping yourself into the ground, brat."

It is annoying at times how well the other man knows him. Barry feels like an open book around Len who just needs to throw a glance at him to know what is bothering him, and while this can be nice and helpful at times, it also makes it hard for him to dodge topics he doesn't want to talk about.

He doesn't reply and instead looks back over to the old television in front of them. On the dark screen, he can make their images out. He keeps his eyes fixed on them.

Len stays quiet too. He knows that trying to urge him to talk wouldn't get him anywhere today, and Barry is grateful for it because Lisa never is as considerate when she wants him to open up about something. It is one of the reasons why he has avoided her for the last week or so.

Like usual, it is Barry who finally breaks the silence, though. Simply because he knows that Len has a point, and usually talking to him helps.

At least, somewhat.

"It's n-not that I-"

A harsh knock to the door cuts him off, and both of them turn to source of the noise.

Len grunts in annoyance and pushes Barry a bit away so that he can get up.

"I-is this a b-bad time?" Barry asks disappointed as he actually wanted to talk now but seeing that he surprised Len with this visit, it is quite possible that the other man has already other plan for tonight…

"Nah." Len grunts as he unlocks the door after shooting a look through the door spy. "Just Mick."

Barry hums and relaxes again.

"Yeah, 's just me," Mick agrees when he enters a moment later as he seems to have caught the last bit. "Sorry I'm not one of your whores, hope you aren't too disappointed, Snart."

Len doesn't even bother to reply to this little quip and instead returns to his spot at the couch.

"We're having a party here?" Mick asks as he follows him and his gaze falls upon Barry.

"Pity-party," Len elaborates. "The brat says he ruined the Wests' dinner, and now they don't like him anymore."

"Don't b-be an ass," Barry grumbles and puts his feet back down onto the floor so that Mick can sit down next to him.

"That sounds like we need more booze." The tall man rumbles in his usual amusement and lifts the six-pack he brought with him.

Barry chuckles and gives his friend a fond look before glancing over to Len. "I l-like him b-better than you."

"How sad," Len replies with a smirk. "Does that mean you'll start to pester him from now on when you need someone to listen to the tragedies of your daily life?"

"Wouldn't mind," Mick pipes up and settles a bit more comfortable into the couch. "'M not having a stick up my ass like certain others here do, after all."

"Thanks, Mick." Barry smiles at the other man before he lets his head drop back and sighs. "Nice t-to know th-that there is s-someone who doesn't mind me."

"Oh, poor you," Len snarks. "I'll start to cry any moment now in sympathy."

"D-don't b-bother." Barry shoots him a grin. "I've Mick now."

"Yeah, he's me now, Snart," Mick agrees which causes the other man to snort. "I don't know why I let you morons even in."

"Because we're friends," Barry points out, and Mick adds. "Yeah, one big happy _family_."

"Lucky me…" Len takes another pull of his beer and leaves it at that.

A brief but comfortable silence settles over them, and Barry decides that he is glad that he has decided to come here-

"You and your boyfriend have a quarrel?"

He frowns and turns his head slightly so that he can meet Mick's eyes. "What?"

The other man shrugs. "You came here, didn't you? Why not going to your better half?"

Barry shifts a bit and turns his gaze back to the ceiling. "He's busy."

"Yeah? With what? Speeding around and playing hero?" Mick asks, and Barry doesn't miss the faint annoyance that clings to his words.

"He _is_ helping p-people," he points out slightly irked by the other man's tone.

"While looking like some cheap pornstar in that tight leather get-up of is."

"It's not l-leather-"

"He still looks like someone you'd usually see on the screen when you watch some gay porno," Mick cuts him off and shoots him a smirk. "Not that there's something wrong with it if you like that stuff."

"Interesting that you seem to know so much about gay porno," Len points out while Barry glares at the other man. "Not that there's something wrong with it if you like that stuff."

"I've no problems with gays. Fuck who you wanna fuck, as long as you get off-"

"No, stop, _p-please_." Barry groans and covers his face with his hands. "D-don't talk ab-bout sex when I'm around."

"You're telling me you didn't get it on with your doctor when he is all geared up in his red leathery suit?" Mick asks which is just plain _wrong_.

"Oh my g-god…"

Len barks a laugh and seems to enjoy Barry's growing mortification, that _jackass_.

"Sh-shut up! N-no m-more talk-king about my b-boyfriend, okay!?" He shoots both of his friends a glare, though he is pretty sure that most of the menace is lost due to how crimson red his face is probably right now.

"Has he come up with a name by now, anyway?" Mick goes on, obviously ignoring him. "He's fast, so it should be something funny like-"

"Mick! S-stop!" Barry shoves his elbow in the other man's side who hardly flinches. "D-don't, ok-kay? I d-don't unders-stand wh-why L-Lisa h-had to t-tell you at all!"

This may be the other reason why Barry is currently avoiding Lisa. Harrison has been understandably upset when he learned that the blond woman told her brother and Mick about his and Barry's powers, and Barry still feels bad about it because he was the one who wanted to tell her so badly…

"We're not getting your partner in trouble," Len tells him calmly. "His secret stays with the three of us, right Mick?"

"Sure," the other man nods and sounds surprisingly earnest.

"He could g-get in trouble should anyb-body learn about his ab-bilities," Barry reminds them just to be on the save site. The notion alone that Harrison could end up as a guinea pig somewhere is upsetting-

"We're not exposing him," Len repeats firmly and this time he turns to face Barry. "He's not the only one we'd get in trouble with this after all, is he?"

Barry feels his cheeks grow uncomfortably warm again, and he lowers his head to study the brown bottle in his hands.

This is not something he wants to talk about…

"You've decided yet whether you want to join Wells as his little sidekick?" Mick asks after a minutes or so went by, and before he can even open his mouth to reply, Len cuts him off firmly. "He's _not_."

Barry frowns in annoyance. "That's n-not for _you_ to d-decide, Len."

His friend turns to him with a slight scowl. "Don't be an idiot. You already feel guilty enough about Wells not being able to save everybody in the Gems, what do you think will happy when you start to run around to _help_ people and someone dies?"

"I'm n-not saying I w-want to d-do wh-what Harrison does, b-but having th-these power is a r-responsibility-"

"Like hell it is," Len cuts him off sharply, and Barry can't help but tense up due to how angry his friend suddenly sounds. "You've enough problems on your own plate to deal with. You put yourself out there, and you'll get killed within a week because your stupid inferiority complex makes you put anybody else before you!"

"I d-don't-"

"What's about Mardon?" the other man goes on, ignoring his protest. "Would you've been able to stop him? You know that idiot, and while you don't like him, I doubt very much that you could've hurt him."

"Th-that's not f-fair, Len, I-"

"What if it was me or Mick?"

This causes Barry to freeze, and he looks at Len with wide taken aback eyes.

"Would you be able to take us down?" Len asks more quietly. "You can't even turn us in as it is, Barry."

"That's n-not…" Barry swallows and can't help but feel slightly betrayed.

They don't talk about this. _Ever_.

"You're a sucker for your friends," Len says nearly tentatively. "You'd have to really face the fact that we are the bad guys here, you couldn't just hide in your lab and ignore this."

"I d-don't d-do that," Barry argues in a slightly hoarse voice, and suddenly being so close to these two is just too much. He gets up, feeling hurt and a bit betrayed because he hasn't thought that Len thought this of him.

That he is a _coward_…

He reaches up to brush his finger over his eyes, angry at himself when he feels the warm dampness of unshed tears. "I sh-should go-"

"For fuck's sake," Len mutters under his breath and gets up as well, cutting Barry's way around the couch table off. He meets his eyes with an expression that is both annoyed and somewhat guilty. "You don't need to go, brat. I didn't mean for it to come over this harshly."

"I wouldn't stick around either if you talked to me like that," Mick remarks drily from his spot at the couch. "I'd have decked you before leaving, tho."

This gets a small chuckle from Barry, and he rubs his eyes once more because they are still itching.

"What a loss that would be," Len replies just as drily before he turns towards Barry again. "I mean what I've said, I don't think that it is anything but a disastrous idea for you to do something like Wells is doing, but it's not for the reason I made it sound like-"

"I'm n-no c-coward," Barry says bitterly and forces himself to meet the other man's eyes. "And us… you b-being my f-friends is _not_ a w-weakness."

"No," Len agrees quietly. "You're not a coward, but that is one of the reasons why I think you shouldn't try and play a hero like Wells or that nutcase in Starling City does. You care too much for others, having to deal with the maniacs and lowlifes that are out there is only going to hurt you badly in the end."

"I'm n-not an idiot," Barry argues stubbornly. "I kn-know how ugly th-the w-word can be-"

"I know that," Len cuts him off with a frustrated sigh. "And I'm not saying you are, but you're empathic towards others. You're working to help people, but you aren't a beat cop or a detective who actually have face the ones who've pulled the trigger. You do everything possible within your comfort zone and that alone is admirable, but you're still uncomfortable of even just being touched by others or actually having to face the murders you've helped to take down."

His friend reaches out for him, and Barry lets him grasp his arm reluctantly, no longer able to meet his eyes. "I'm not saying that you're a coward because of it. You aren't, but you're still not over what happened to you, and if you put yourself out there you'll have to fight, you'll have to go up toe to toe with guys like that. Murderers, abusers, and rapist. The twins' problems are hardly only bank robbers or car chases, and do you really think that you're up for this?"

Barry bites his lower lip and tries to not feels so upset about this. He isn't really angry at Len. Sure, him saying this stuff isn't exactly nice, but he has a point…

It is just that Barry hates how right he is.

… because he is still _damaged_…

"Barry." Len sighs softly, and Barry doesn't fight when he pulls him closer into a hug.

Hugs aren't something he gets too often from Len which is a shame because he is a really good hugger…

"You're a great person," the other man says quietly while Barry buries his face into the crook of his neck. "You're not weak, and you're not broken." His breath is warm when it hits his skin, and he shudders lightly in response.

"You're just still healing," Len goes on and starts to rub his back with one hand. "Just give yourself some more time, okay?"

"'kay." He agrees somewhat reluctantly. It is embarrassing how thin his voice sounds, and he really doesn't want to let go and step back after he has lost it like this again. He still does, though, because he knows that he can't hold on to the other man forever, no matter how much he wants to right now.

Len pats his back once more and gives him a faint but warm smile which Barry returns before he ducks his head. "S-sorry about… th-this…"

"It's fine." Len shrugs.

Barry settle back down on the couch after that, and Len calls a pizza delivery while he gets himself another beer from the fridge.

"So," Mick starts and eyes him somewhat curiously. "How's life with your new powers."

Barry smiles slightly and shrugs, glad that his friend isn't uncomfortable around him after what has just happened. "Same as b-before."

"Really?" The other man makes an incredulous face. "Being super-fast all of a sudden has no perks?"

"I'm not using th-them," Barry explains and takes a sip of his beer before he grimaces because it has gotten too warm by now.

"Why?" Mick gives him a look like he really doesn't get him right now.

Barry shrugs and studies the rim of the bottle's head again while he turns the smooth glass in his hands. "Doesn't f-feel right. 'S like I'm cheating or… dunno." He shrugs and glances at Mick.

"You can move faster than sound, and you don't use this for anything?" his friend repeats slowly.

"Pretty much."

Mick snorts and shakes his head before he takes a pull of his own beer. "Of course."

Then, he seems to stop for a moment, and Barry already knows that he is not going to like what he has come up with when his friend turns back to him with an amused glint in his eyes.

"You know, we'll pull a thing next week for which your powers would come in-"

"_Don't_, Mick." Len's sharp voice cuts the other man off. He is still in the kitchen on the phone and when Barry glances back at him, he can see that his friend is currently glaring daggers at the other criminal.

"He'd be a handy asset," Mick points out, but Len doesn't seem impressed in the least as he covers the receiver of the phone. "He won't, and he isn't interested."

Barry frowns annoyed but decides to ignore his friends as he lets himself sink a bit lower into the couch, sighing softly.

It's been a long day, but he's still glad he came over, he feels calmer again…

Someone pushes him lightly, and Barry blinks his eyes open, slightly confused for a second. Then, he realizes that he must have been about to nod off and turns to Mick who shoved him. His friend meets his gaze with an amused smirk. "Don't fall asleep, I don't need you to drool onto my shoulder again."

"Th-that was _one_ time," he grumbles and rubs his eyes just as Len rejoins them.

"I've ordered two family sized Chicago deep dished just for you," Len tells him and hands him another bottle of cool beer which Barry gladly accepts. "I hope that's enough for your metabolism."

"It's fine, thanks. I've had like two seconds at Joe's," he explains and let himself settle against the his friend again.

"While they were fighting?" Len sounds surprised, and Barry understands because he usually isn't good with eating when he is in such a situation due to his easily upset stomach. Next to the ability of being super-fast, he seems to have gained a stomach of steel as well, though.

"Yeah, I was just really hungry." He shrugs and rests his cheek on Len's shoulder.

"Does that mean I won't be able to call you beanpole for much longer anymore?" Mick asks in fake concern.

"B-bite me."

The other man snorts and reaches for the remote control of the television that is resting on the table in front of him. "There's a baseball game I wanna catch."

Len hums and asks. "Who's playing?"

"Angles against the Rockets."

"They both suck."

"_You_ suck."

Barry smiles and closes his eyes. He feels drowsy and comfortable, and it doesn't take him long to nod off once again as he listens to his friends' debate about which team has been the best baseball team so far in this season.

When he wakes up to someone shaking him slightly, the first thought that crosses his mind is that it has to be due to their food having been delivered, and he forces his eyes open with some difficulty.

"'M 'wake," he murmurs and reaches up for the hand that is still holding his shoulder.

As expected, it is Len who has woken him, and Barry gives him a drowsy smile that quickly wanes when he notices his friends pinched expression.

"Is everyth-thing alright?" he asks and makes a protesting sound when he notices the open and nearly empty box of pizza on the table in front of him.

"Don't worry, yours' still in the kitchen." Len snorts and seems to fight the urge to roll his eyes. Then the amusement seems to leave him, and he looks grim once again.

Before Barry can ask what has happened, Len nods to the entrance…

Where Harrison is standing.

"Huh…" Barry blinks a couple of times, uncertain whether he is really all the way awake, and rubs his eyes. His confusion is quickly replaced by worry, though, when he really realizes that his partner is really currently present in Len's apartment.

"Harrison? D-did someth-thing happen?" he asks concerned and get up, glad when Len steps back and let him pass.

Harrison looks a bit embarrassed for a second which catches Barry off-guard seeing that this is a rather unusual expression for him.

"Your friend Ms. West called me," Harrison explains as he watches him comes closer. "She told me about the dinner and how it didn't go as well as you've hoped."

"Iris c-called you?" Barry is surprised for a moment and reaches for the back pocket of his pants where he usually puts his phone...

… and where it _isn't_.

He groans softly and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I forgot it th-there…"

"Yes," Harrison agrees. "And she was a bit worried about you after you've left, and she couldn't reach you."

"So she called you," he finishes, and makes an unhappy face. "S-sorry, I d-didn't mean to worry you…"

Barry pauses then and frowns. "How d-did you know I'm h-here, th-though?"

"Yes," Len agrees from behind him, audibly tersely. "And why the fuck do you know where I live?"

"You expect me not to keep taps on known criminals who went in and out of my laboratories for months, most of the time without my actual permission?" Harrison replies and sounds slightly amused. Barry can actually hear Len grind his molars over this, and shoots an uneasy look between both of them. Harrison seems to notices this as he goes on. "You don't need to worry, Mr. Snart. I won't cause you any troubles."

"Did you use your superpowers to follow him back here?" Mick asks from where he is leaning against the wall next to kitchen entrance, eying Harrison rather hostile.

"M-Mick," Barry warns him, annoyed that his two friends have to behave like this towards his partner.

"I didn't," Harrison replies, and Barry feels himself relax somewhat, at least till the other man adds. "I used a tracker."

"_Harrison_!"

At least, Harrison has the decency to look somewhat guilty. "I know that it wasn't the best way to deal with this, Barry, but I was honestly concerned about you."

"Or your inventions," Len adds with a sneer.

Harrison ignores him, and instead steps a bit closer to Barry. He reaches for him and takes a loose hold of his right writs while he seems to give him a brief once over. "Iris told me that I'll probably find here, and I just wanted to make sure that you're okay. Ms. West did sound quite worried, but I'm still sorry for intruding like this."

"W-well…" Barry turns his hand to take hold of Harrison's in return and briefly glances back to a still very pissed off looking Len. "Thank you, I… I m-mean for making sure th-that I'm alright. I'm n-not angry, I sh-should have called or t-texted you, but the d-dinner w-was a b-bit ups-setting, and I didn't w-want to bother you at w-work. I just needed t-to go somep-place to c-clear my head."

"I understand." Harrison gives his hand a squeezes. "I'm quite familiar with the need to clear one's head once in a while."

Barry chuckles and can't help but think that he really likes the way Harrison is smiling at him right now…

"Your food is getting cold, beanpole," Mick interrupts the tender moment like the pro he is. Barry shoots him a glare over his shoulder and is disappointed when Harrison lets go of his hand and steps back. "I think I'll leave you to your meal then."

He wants to protest and tell him that he can stay as well, and that they could share but…

Barry knows that this wouldn't be such a good idea. Neither Len nor Mick seem to like having his partner around, especially now that they found out that Harrison used a tracker on them.

"Are you g-going back to th-the labs?" he asks while he tries to fight off the guilt about letting him leave alone like this.

"We're done for today. I will go home and call it a night."

"Okay." Barry agrees. "I'll probably be home in a bit too."

Harrison nods before he briefly glances behind him to the other two men, and then he is gone, fast enough that even Barry isn't able to watch him leave.

A brief moment of silence follows.

"Pretentious dick." Mick snorts, and Barry shoots him another dark look, but as usual it doesn't show any effect.

"Go grab your food," Len tells him, and he doesn't miss that he still sounds rather grim.

"I'm s-sorry about th-this, Len," Barry apologizes and really means it. He knows that his friend doesn't like Harrison and this probably did nothing to change that.

"It's fine, not your fault, brat." Len nods towards the kitchen with a faint smirk. "Get your food, you're probably already starving as it is."

As if on a cue, Barry's stomach rumbles loud enough that he feels himself flush in embarrassment again.

"Right," he mutters and quickly makes his way over to the kitchen, ignoring the amused looks he receives from his two friends, while they retake their seats on the couch and turn the TV back on.


End file.
